It Must've Been Love
C.C. Babcock was in a very, very bad mood.
She couldn't get any work done because Maxwell was too distracted by Nanny Fine, her mother was less than impressed by their latest production (and didn't waste any time in letting her know so), and to top it all off, Brighton just put a gym sock in one of her martinis.
But what really ticked her off was the fact that Niles had just met someone new; Amy.
This was surprising for C.C. because – well, let's face it – Niles meeting someone would be, if anything, a relief for her, someone to finally get that butler out her hair! But no, she felt… quite the opposite.
Niles and Amy were always spending time together. It seemed for C.C. a relief at first but after a while, she couldn't help but feel left out whenever she saw the both of them laughing together. Heck, Niles wouldn't even pull out a zinger anymore, and C.C. was strangely beginning to miss all of that.
And that is why she stormed into the kitchen that day, yelling:
"Niles! Where the hell is my coffee? I haven't got all day, you know!"
She huffed as she slumped down into her chair.
"No need to be so snappy," he mumbled as he prepared her drink.
C.C. rolled her eyes. Well, damn you too.
"Fine!" she said as she turned to Niles. "If I'm such a pain in the ass why don't you go talk to that Amy girl instead?"
Niles furrowed his brows in confusion. "Miss Babcock, why are you acting so hostile?" he asked, looking for a mug. "And according to my calendar you have at least a week before you start hating me for no reason."
C.C. shook her head, trying to control herself before she exploded. That's it.
C.C. was trying to keep her cool but her fingers were drumming dangerously fast on the tabletop. "Niles, why are you so insulting?"
Her question caught him off guard. She's supposed to reply with a zinger! "I beg your pardon?"
"You heard what I said," she replied, walking over to Niles. "You think you're so funny, don't you? Insulting me everyday, calling me names. Well, you know what? It's really not funny AT ALL! No. No, in fact it's annoying!"
That last word really hit Niles like a tonne of bricks. "Annoying?"
"Yes!" She yelled as she started pacing the room.
"And it just – it makes me so – " She clenched her fists trying to think of the right word, "Sometimes you make me so - " What was that word? "So-"
Niles was getting impatient, "Oh, will you spit it out? I make you so what?!"
"YOU MAKE ME SO ANGRY, NILES!"
C.C. clutched her chest, trying to steady her breathing. Damn you, damn you, damn you.
"Miss Babcock? Are – Are you alright?" he asked, his eyes full of concern. Niles immediately clutched her shoulders, worried she might collapse to the floor after that sudden outburst.
She huffed as she stared at a spot on the floor. There were so many emotions running through her right now; anger, frustration, confusion, hate. What the hell was he expecting when he asked that?
And yet there was something… so very profound about the whole situation. Never before had she displayed her emotions so strongly. Never before had she felt emotions so strongly. This was, after all, C.C. Babcock. And C.C. Babcock had always had her emotions in check.
She felt strange. But it was a good kind of strange. The kind of strange that just took time.
For a moment there, that feeling - whatever that feeling may be - twisted itself in such a way, that it wasn't just anger anymore, not really. No, it was a mix of something else, something almost... pleasant?
And that brought her back to Niles' question:
Is she alright?
And at the same time there was a sadness to it. But it was a very pronounced kind of sadness, a very - a very fond kind of sadness.
It was such an odd mixture of emotions, all of them interwoven into that one bittersweet feeling - whatever that feeling may be - and C.C. for once wasn't sure if she actually was alright. That feeling of uncertainty, that feeling of not knowing, it was something so foreign to her. It made her feel so.. so free?
She felt as if she had just realised something, though she wasn't quite sure what it was.
And in spite of all of this, the shouting, the yelling, the fighting, she couldn't help but feel... happy.
Still staring at that spot on the floor, she broke into a tired, relieved kind of smile, and replied:
"I'm – I'm wonderful."
Niles looked at her funny. Has she gone mad? "Are you sure, Miss Babcock? You don't need a drink or something?" he asked, worrying if the workload she was under had finally taken its toll on her.
She smiled, shaking her head as if that was the silliest question she had ever heard, "Yes, I'm-"
She turned to face Niles.
Her cheeks suddenly began to feel very warm, her breathing was getting heavy, her head felt oddly light...
Is this still anger?
She looked at that worried expression he wore on his face, that sandy blond hair which always seemed to have the right kind of messiness to it, those concerned eyes –
Oh, those eyes... So very blue, you could get lost in them...
And C.C. herself was beginning to feel very, very lost in those eyes.
"I'm fine," she sighed, her hand still clutched to her chest.
"Miss - Miss Babcock," he said, in a softer tone now. "Your cheeks are turning pink."
"Are they?" she said dreamily as she touched her right cheek.
Both were silent for a few moments. The tension in the air was so thick you could slice it with a knife.
Oh, and she could feel that strange, unnamable feeling growing at the pit of her stomach, and as it grew, she could feel as if it were gripping and tugging at her poor, racing heart. No, things were moving much too fast now, much too fast for her liking, and C.C. was starting to have trouble keeping up...
For a moment there, that feeling - whatever that feeling may be - started to become very overwhelming,
Too overwhelming, that C.C. had a sudden urge to - well, it's just that they were standing so close to each other now and it was almost as if -
Is this anger I'm supposed to be feeling?
Almost as if they were about to...
"Yes, well, I - uh - I really should be going, I need to get the groceries for tonight's dinner," a very flustered Niles said as he proceeded to leave the kitchen. He turned and nodded in C.C.'s direction, "Miss Babcock."
And with that, he left.
C.C. didn't say anything, nor did she move. She was still trying to register what just happened.
She slowly walked towards the door, one hand on the countertop. She needed support as her knees were feeling weak.
And she stared longingly at Niles as he went away.
And she stood there for a very long time.
And she slumped back down in her chair.
Of course it was anger! Of course it was hate! What else could it have been? C.C. thought, shaking her head.
Because anger is what happens when someone insults you, anger is what happens when someone annoys you!
She turned to the countertop and saw that cup of coffee Niles had prepared for her.
Isn't it?
She sighed heavily, confused.
It felt so much like anger but - but it was just so different, so - so strong! What was it then? Sadness? Fear? No! No, it must've been-
C.C.'s eyes widened as it dawned on her.
"Oh, God."
C.C. Babcock had just realised what the name of that particular feeling was.
"It must've been love."