Okay me and my friend were talking about contests we sould do for our Zelda guild during the holidays and i just came up with some funny ideas. So here they are, a Christmas Fanfic in September. I am sorry for the OOC-ness of this story but im bored, and really random. But You'll laugh.
I DO NOT own the Legend of Zelda games nor will i ever but enjoy this fic.
A Zelda Christmas
It was early in the morning when the castle was busying around with all the christmas cheer. The king was placing some of the gifts under neither the tree, that was to Zelda's friends from both the King and Zelda, when a teenaged girl wearing pink with long blonde hair came runing down the stairs followed by two girls, one wearing green with green hair and the other with a white night gown on with long red hair. The king turned to them and smiled.
"Well morning Zelda, Saria, Malon" he said.
"Morning father." "Morning sir." The three girls chimed togeither. Sitting down and sipping on the newly arrived hot apple cider. Then they heard foot steps coming towards th room. The tapping of leather boots gave away who it was. Link turned around the corner, an arm full of wrapped presents, he walked over and sat them down by the tree. Dressed in his usual green tunic and hat. He sat down next to the girls, a sweat drop on his head as all three girls dazed at him. Then at the same time looked away with blushes on their faces with the same thought going thru their heads.
I hope I get cought under the mistletoe with Link
"Well then, since Link is here we can open presents."The king said softly as he grabbed one of the ones he was giving out and handed it to Saria. It looked like a box of chocolates. She blushed thinking The king is a freaking pedofile she then opened it, her face going pail. the girls looked at what it was. It was a bunch of pickled foods such as, pickled chicken feet, pickled bean sproits, pickled bull livers. "T-thanks" She said softly
The king then reached for an other present handing it to Malon. She then opens it up. It was a letter telling her about singing lessons"m-my father said i sing good"she said before going into the nearest corner and resuming the fetal posstion, going all Emo. Everyone in the room quickly gained a sweat drop.
The king then reached for a heavy present for Link, handing it to him. Link opens it finding three books entitled. Lockpicking 101: You don't really need a small key . The second one Entitled Legend of Zelda Strategy Guide The last one How to Save the Kingdom Correctly Link smile was stranded"thank you sir"he said thru gritted teeth.
The king reached for the last one. which was for Zelda. Zelda's face was lighten up. He remember how much she wanted that new gaming system called Wii along with the game Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess. She he tried giving it to her.
Flash back
It was 3am as he stood in the chilling rain waitting for the Gamestop to open up, He was second in line. Once the doors were opened he went inside only for the person in frount of him had bought all the shops Wiis and Twilight Princesses. Two days later he had come down with a bad cold.
The king did remember though how she kept saying that she wanted TP. Which he thought meant toilet paper. He then handed her, her present. Zelda quickly opened it and went pale, It was a package of mega roll Charmin Ultra. Zelda smiled as the King said, "Just what you wanted!"
Link laughed gently to himself only to get smacked with the package in his face. He sighed and went to give Zelda her present. Zelda quickly opened it. Only to find a book Entitled How NOT to be kidnapped by an evil Lord Trying to Take Over the Kingdom and Having a Teenaged Elf Wearing a Dress and Tights Save Her.
Zelda then threw the book at Link, making him fall backwards into the tree, the tree then falling ontop of him. Making all three girls laugh as he got up, an ornament hanging from both earrings. He quickly removed them to hand Malon her Present.
Malon Quickly opened the present and looked at the packed meat to read the label"Horse meat" Malon quickly ran after Link and wrapped her hands around his neck banging his head against the floor"You butt monkey how could you do this to Epona?!?!" Link Quickly replied" I...didn't...Epon...a...is...right...out...si...de." Malon quickly got up and dusted off her dress. "oh I'm sorry Link"she said. Link nodded catching his breath.
Link regained posture and handed Saria a present. It was a simple book that was titled My first Ocarina . Saria smiled and then pulled out her Ocarina and started to play the songs in the book. Hot Crust buns was filled though the room.
There was this yelling noise from somewhere outside then a Tiny man in Green came flying through the window with a red popped ballon on his back as he stood up. Brushing himself off and then smiled. "Sorry guys, I guess I had too many egg nogs when I broke out of the 'Happy Hotel'." he said. Link slapped his forehead shaking his head. then there was loud foot steps. "Oh by the way, someone else came with me from the Hotel" Tingle said as Gannondorf walks around the corner.
Without any more presents to passout. The gang and their two friends, one who was consently calling Link a fairy. And one Who keeps looking at Zelda oddly. They ate a large, and by large I meant a feast, dinner. It was silent execpt for the plup when Link finally knoked Tingle out. and threw him in a random room. They gathered around a piano and started to play christmas songs. When Link came up with a random one right when Tingle was walking into the room holding his head.
Joy to the world
Tingles dead
We bar-b-qued his head
Don't worry about the body
We flushed it down the potty.
And round and roung it goes
Tingle still obvously drunk joined in with everyone and everyone was holding hands. One everyone was leaving. Tingle and Gannondorf looke dup and noticed some Mistletoe. Gannondorf then lifted him up and kissed him on the lips. Both blushing deeply when Gannondorf dropped him like a sack of peanuts. Then they all parted their own ways. Zelda. Link, Saria and Malon all green at the gills and running for the bathroom to vomit. due to the yaoi-ness that just happened.
Okay Guys I got really bored and then sleepy so I finished this quickly, it could be better, i might fix it later. But reveiw! Pwease.