Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, or it's characters, neither do I own the songs used in the story there is NO COPYRIGHT INTENDED.
Sad Songs
Bella's P.O.V
My room had become so messy lately, Edward had offerred to help me clean it, and I had grudgingly agreed. Even I had to admit that it was starting to become hazordous.
While Edward sorted through the pile of things on my table where my cd player was, I takled the horror's of underneath my bed.
Just as I was getting ready to vacum up the dust bunny coloney that seemed to be living under my bed, I heard the familar notes of "It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing" by Shania Twain.
Hope life's been good to you
since you've been gone
I'm doin' fine now--I've finally moved on
It's not so bad--I'm not that sad
I'm not surprised just how well I survived
I'm over the worst, and I feel so alive
I can't complain--I'm free again
[Chorus:
And it only hurts when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath--to forget
Don't think I'm lyin' 'round cryin' at night
There's no need to worry, I'm really all right
I've never looked back--as a matter of fact
[Chorus
It only hurts when I breathe
Mmm, no, I've never looked back--
as a matter fact
I spun around to see Edward hovering over my cd player listening to the words of the song. I tried to ignore it, knowing that if I explained what the cd was it would hurt Edward just as much as it was hurting me, and I silently scolded myself for not throwing the disc out.
And it only hurts when I'm breathing -- when I'm breathing
My heart only breaks when it's beating -- when it's beating
My dreams only die when I'm dreaming
So, I hold my breath--to forget
It only hurts -- Hurts when I'm breathing
Heart only breaks --Breaks when it's beating
Dreams only die --Die when I'm dreaming
It only hurts when I breathe.
The song ended and the next one came on, this time it was "Break My Heart" by Hilary Duff.
Someone always gets their hearts stomped to the ground
This is what I see every time I look around
I never thought that this would happen to me
I never thought I'd end up this way
And now that you're through with me
Don't know what to do with me
I guess I'm my own again
Like I'm some kind of enemy
Never a friend to me
Remember when you used to say
Things will always be this way
[Chorus
Why don't you, break my heart
Watch me fall apart you see
I'm falling apart, look what you're doing to me
Now I'm trying to get my heart up off the ground
My confidence is gone
Happiness can not be found
So look what you did to me
You got the best of me
And now I'm stuck with all the rest
It will never be the same
Why don't you, break my heart
Watch me fall apart you see
I'm falling apart, look what you're doing to me
Break my heart
Watch me fall apart you see
I'm falling apart, look what you're doing to me
All I ever wanted
Has left me standing here alone
It started with you and ended with me
All I ever needed
I had it with you in my arms
It started with you and ended with me
Break my heart
Watch me fall apart you see
I'm falling apart, look what you're doing to me
Why don't you, break my heart
Watch me fall apart you see
I'm falling apart, look what you're doing to me
Why don't you, break my heart
Watch me fall apart you see
I'm falling apart, look what you're doing to me
Why don't you, break my heart
Break my heart
Break my heart
Break my heart
Break my heart
Break my heart
Break my heart
I felt unwanted tears spring to my eyes, as I remembered listening to these songs and I fought them back before Edward could see. "Still Under The Weather" by Shania Twain filled the room and I couldn't help it any more, tears began streaming down my face.
My first lesson losing a love was you
Learning to live with your memory was lesson number two
And I can't lie, baby
I still cry sometimes
But I've come a long way
Towards gettin' you out of my mind
I'm still under the weather
But I'm over the storm
I still miss the shelter
Of your loving arms
But what I thought would kill me
Has just made me strong
I'm still under the weather
But I'm over the storm
Sometimes your memory still gets the best of me
But that lonely ache in my heart
Ain't as bad as it used to be
And sometimes the way that I'm feelin'
Inside doesn't show
But I know
I'll get over you, I've just got a long way to go
I'm still under the weather
But I'm over the storm
I still miss the shelter
Of your loving arms
But what I thought would kill me
Has just made me strong
I'm still under the weather
But I'm over the storm
I'm still under the weather
But I'm over the storm
Edward pressed the pause button and came over, noticing the tears staining my cheeks, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his lap.
"Shush Bella, shush, it's okay. What's wrong?" he asked confusion coloring his tone.
I shook my head, wanting to spare him from the pain those songs were causing me to remember.
"Bella," his tone was stern and authoritive now, "Tell me." he forced me to look into his eyes, trying desperatley to dazzle the answer out of me, but I only cried harder, remembering times when I struggled to remember looking into them.
"It's nothing." I said trying to sound calm, but my voice came out shaky and it broke on nothing.
He took my face in his hands and his eyes turned pleading.
"Please Bella, I hate seeing you in so much pain, I want to help."
I sighed, there was never anything I could keep from him when he really wanted to know.
"That was the cd of songs I listened to when you left me," I said still crying so my words came out in gasps. "Back in Pheniox I used to do it all the time to help focus my emotions and deal with them, but of course it didn't help. None of those songs even came close to what I was feeling, how much pain I was in, and how worthless I felt." I continued watching his face warily, expecting his features to contort in pain, as he blamed himself again.
A look of comprehension crossed his face, but it was quickly overshadowed by pain, he began comforting me, even so.
"I'm so sorry." he whispered fiercely hugging me tight to his side.
I hated myself for doing this too him, so I pushed myself up to kiss him whispering "It's okay, it's not your fault."
He looked like he was about to disagree so I quickly covered his lips with mine.
"Well," he said pulling away gasping "at least you picked some fairly decent songs, I never knew you had such good taste," he said a hint of a smile playing on his lips "and that first on struck a cord with me too even though 2 of the three didn't exactly fit."
I smiled, my cheeks still stained with tears.
"Plus," he added "this helped me understand you better, and it seems we were both equally miserable." he said trying to make his tone light and joking.
It worked, I laughed. "Well that's great, I wouldn't want you getting lucky and being more miserable than me, that just wouldn't be fair now would it?"
He scowled in mock outrage "Certainly not." he said his eyes teasing.
I leaned up and once again planted my lips on his, smiling this time.
"I love you." I whispered against his lips.
"I love you too." he whispered back.
We ended up forgetting all about cleaning and just sat their in each others arms, more happy and in love than anyone had the right to be.
Later on I broke the cd in two throwing it away along with any doubts I had, returning to my happy life with Edward there for every moment of it.
The End
I hope you guys liked it it's my first sad mixed with romantic fic, please review and I'll do a sequel this time about Edward and what happens when Bella finds his cd. Love ya'll and thx for reading:) :)