She dug another fingernail into her arm, under her skin, and slashed away. The bright red welt joined multiple others on her other arm and legs, and one on her face. She felt disgusted at herself. She
hated
herself.
Useless. She slashed another line on her arm. Weak. Another joined its bleeding brethren. Abomination. Another slash. Unwanted. Slash.
She stood up unsteadily, pain screwing her brain over but she stared determinedly at the brick wall of a building. Snow fell in flurries and landed on her upturned face and she stared at the black sky above. The moon couldn't bother to grace her with its presence to witness her last moments. Pathetic me, she thought. A laugh came tumbling out of her mouth, so despondent that even dogs in the nearby area started howling.
Looking back on her life, she realised it was so miserable that it somehow felt funny. Hilarious even. She laughed until her stomach ached and tears rolled down before she smiled sadly again then screamed out all her anguish—
and ran into the brick wall.
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A really rancid smell invaded her nose that she couldn't ignore it even when she was close to death. She used the momentary conciousness to open her eyes and stared blearily at the source of the horrid smell.
A pair of sunglasses. Attached to it was an old homeless man...ahh...what do they call them? MADAO...right?
"LITTLE GIRL CAN YOU HEAR ME?! ARE YOU OKAY?! I'M GOING TO GO FIND HELP RIGHT NOW DON'T DIE ON ME YOU HEAR ME?!"
MADAO's eyebrows were furrowed in worry and he held her head with extreme care, before lifting her onto his back, ignoring all the blood that was getting onto his clothes (or rags rather). The horrible smell multiplied ten fold for her and she swear the little lifespan she had shortened immediately from 2 candles to one burning stub. She almost wanted to crawl off the back of MADAO to escape the stench but didn't have the strength to do so. Still, she was very touched by MADAO's actions. In her 19 years of life, no one gave an ounce of care about her— there was Yura, but she was dead. Because of her.
Hey Yura, I'm going to join you soon in the afterlife, wait for me okay?
She closed her eyes and whispered 'thank you' to MADAO before darkness took over once again.
Hasegawa strained himself to run faster as the little warmth the little girl had left started to fade.
"Hell, I came for a little stroll for more cardboard and I picked up a dying girl instead...AHH GOTTA GET TO YOROZUYA QUICK!"
Hasegawa turned his head slightly to look at her arm draped over his shoulder. Skin flapped and deep gashes that would surely leave scars lined her arm. Hasegawa then peeked at her fingers to find blood and little pieces of flesh stuck in her long fingernails.
Self-harming...huh...she needs more help than I thought. Hasegawa shook his head and concentrated on running.
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"Oi, oi, its 3 am in the morning, what the heck—" Gintoki stopped in his tracks once he slammed open the sliding door to find Hasegawa panting heavily, while piggybacking a mangled girl still dripping blood everywhere.
Damn. Gintoki has seen alot of blood and gruesome things throughout his life, but the suddenness and the contrast of the crimson blood making pretty red flowers (A/N: HAHA PIRAKO) in the stark white snow surprised him.
"Washts going on Gin-chan...itsh sow early..mmgh." Kagura rubbed her eyes and yawned as she stumbled to the front door.
"Kagura, go prepare some towels and hot water. Get the first aid kit too. Quick!" Gin switched on to serious mode and Kagura was wide awake in an instant. She finally took a good look at the supposed huge beef she thought MADAO was carrying, and realised it was a badly injured girl. Kagura's eyes widened and she sprinted off to prepare the things needed.
Meanwhile, Gintoki laid out another extra futon in his bedroom and Hasegawa put the girl down, careful not to touch her wounds too much.
"What the fuck happened, attacked by some random crazy guy?" Gintoki sighed and ran a hand through his natural permed hair.
"Nah, found her in some deserted alley while I was looking around for some cardboard. Look at her fingernails, she self-harmed." Hasegawa lit a cigarette and took a deep breath of smoke.
"Probably even tried to kill herself by running into the wall." Gintoki glanced at her bleeding head just when Kagura burst into the room, Sadaharu right behind carrying the first aid kit in his mouth.
"Ahhh it's going to be a long night." Gintoki complained as he dunked the towel into the pail of warm water.
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So warm. She opened her eyes slowly and saw an unfamiliar ceiling. Am I not dead? Or is this hell? Does hell even have houses? And this futon is really comfortable...why the heck am I in it?
She turned her head (very slowly too since her head was still throbbing and felt like a gorilla was pounding away with a 1000 ton hammer) to find a huge mountain of fluffy white fur and 3 humans. A red-headed girl, a sliver-haired man, and sunglasses. Oh sorry, MADAO.
She coughed lightly and the mountain of fur let out a bark that woke all 3 people. Ah, so the mountain of fur was just a huge ass dog.
"SHE'S AWAKE GIN-CHAN LOOK! Yo, I'm Kagura, and this is my dog Sadaharu, and this is Gin-chan, and this is MAD...sungl—Hasegawa." Kagura pointed excitedly at each individual as she introduced them.
"Yo, you awake? You haven't lost your memories right? Can you remember your name?" The sliver haired man yawned and scratched his chin.
She blinked and thought back for a moment, sadness clouding her green eyes. She still remembered everything unfortunately, including this MADAO's effort to save her. She offered a small smile to the people looking expectantly at her. "Water."
"What? Your name is water? Your parents must have short-circuited brains to call you that."
"Gin-san, she meant that she needs water to drink, not that her name is water." Hasegawa spoke up and glared at Gintoki like he was the one with the short-circuited brain.
Kagura helpfully lifted her head up and tilted the cup of water to her parched lips. She drank greedily and only stopped when not a single drop was left.
"Sorry for the bad introduction, I'm Mihoshi Rae. I really appreciate your intentions for saving me...but it wasn't needed." Rae trailed off at the end, but her words still rang out clearly in the room.
How ironic that help only arrived after years of pleading and praying. Where was help when I needed it? Rae thought bitterly. She wished she was dead instead. Wouldn't have to face a tommorow without Yura-chan.
"Oi, oi, we went through the trouble of reviving you, at least tell us what happened," Gintoki gestured to Rae's wounds, "maybe we could help."
A shadow passes over Rae's face and a cold mask slammed into place, shutting out whatever emotions Gintoki's question evoked. "Its nothing really, just your typical teenager being all emotional." Rae tried smiling but it twisted unnaturally.
All three looked at her sullenly, but no one pressed Rae to talk more.
Gintoki and Hasegawa left soon after to acquire more medical supplies, leaving Kagura and Sadaharu to watch over Rae.
"Ne, Rae-san, would you like some sukonbu, uh-huh? I can only cook rice with raw eggs, but Gin-chan said unwell people must drink porridge, so we can only wait until Shinpachi comes to cook for us. Sukonbu is healthy too. Here, I'll give you some of my stash."
Kagura stood up and pried open a loose floorboard (yes, in Gin-chan's room), reaching into the surprisingly deep hole filled with a stash of sweets and junk food and ALOT OF SUKONBU, before throwing 3 packets of sukonbu onto Rae's lap.
"Thank you."
"Nah, eat those and recover quickly! Speaking of Shinpachi, he's a Yorozuya member and he's just glasses actually. He should be coming pretty s—ah he's here he's here!"
Kagura bounced out the room and greeted him before yelling at the poor boy to cook some porridge for the new guest.
"Eh? New guest?" Shinpachi rounded the corner and greeted Rae with a good morning before scuttling back in shock.
"WHY IS OUR NEW GUEST A MUMMY?! DID YOU TWO GO EXPLORING SOME TOMB IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?!"
Rae checked herself out to find she had been wrapped from head to toe in bandages, and multiple plasters had been stuck together to form a long plaster covering her gash on the face. Only her eyes and mouth peeked out from the bandages as she blinked at the bespectacled boy in front of her.
Recovering from his shock (by Kagura kicking his shin and reminding him to cook porridge), Shinpachi apologised for his mistake and hurried away to the kitchen with Kagura tagging along, explaining what happened yesterday night.
Rae relaxed into the futon and closed her eyes, giving a little sigh. What a lively household. Sadaharu whined and laid his big heavy head on her body, almost suffocating Rae and hurting her wounds a little, but she didn't mind.
She glanced at the sharp scissors lying near her bed which was used to cut the bandages, but Sadaharu growled a little, as if he knew what she was thinking about. He definitely was keeping an eye on her. The vibration of his growl tickled her, and Rae giggled. Raising her hand (again, slowly) to pet Sadaharu, she thought: Maybe it isn't so bad to relax and sleep for now.
Rae escaped into blissful sleep.
Rae is pronounced RAH-EH
She seems even more suicidal than Hasegawa heheh, not that its a good thing.
If anyone is self-harming, or needs help, please come message me, I may be able to help, even if its only a little. Don't suffer alone.
I suck at author notes and descriptions. Gah. I HAD SO MANY JOKES I WANTED TO IMPLEMENT BUT ITS STILL AT A BIT OF A SERIOUS STAGE NOW SO I HAD TO HOLD BACK AAAAA
NOTE: in this story, the OC is not paired with anyone, its a story of her finding help, love and family, recovering from her dark past. There is gin x tsukuyo and okita x kagura though. :D
Maybe I should pair her with Shinpachi.