Title: Spider Prank
Author: S J Smith
Rating: Gen
Disclaimer: I don't own the original, I certainly don't own this version, either.
Summary: Roy's not the only one scared of spiders.
Notes: This story takes place in D M Evans's 'verse, which includes "Source of Sorrows", "Sorrows Dark Array" and "When Sorrow Comes" (all of which should be here on FFN, if you want to read more). The Sorrows verse is one of my favorite fandom series, and one I reread at least once a year.
"The bastard's scared of spiders." Edward rocked his chair back onto two legs, folding his arms and grinning in delight.
"Brother, don't," Alphonse groaned. "It's cruel." He turned to his brother's erstwhile fellow prankster. "Isn't it, Dev?"
Dev shuddered. "Even the bastard doesn't deserve spiders. No one deserves spiders."
Edward snorted. "Spiders aren't bad. I mean, only a few of them are poisonous; they take care of a lot of insects that would otherwise destroy crops we need to feed ourselves; they make gorgeous webs that can be used to heal wounds in a pinch - "
"Ishvala!" Dev's shudder went full-body. "I don't want anyone putting a spider web on me!"
Flashing a lot of teeth, Edward said, "Guess you don't want to know how you got healed from that last explosion you lived through."
"It wasn't through a stupid spider!" Leaping to his feet, Dev stalked around the office the Elric brothers shared in the military headquarters. "It was through Ishvala's graces, and excellent healers." He pointed a finger at Edward's smirk. "Not spiders!" He stomped out of the office.
"No, Brother," Alphonse chided.
"Oh, come on, Al, just a few little spiders, and." Edward's grin stretched almost painfully wide as he dropped his chair down on all fours again. "Now, where can I find them?"
Alphonse groaned. Now he'd have to get Winry involved, and she'd yell at Edward, and Edward would yell at him, but at least he wouldn't have to hear about it from Dev and Riza…because she'd be the one to shoot his brother, if he actually scared Roy with spiders.
~ end ~