Hikari: Hi, ya'll! Oh, I've always wanted to say that . . .

Roy: Weell I wanna say I like pie do you like pie? mumble mumble

Ed: hehe . . . too much coffee, as usual . . .

Hikari: well, next story.

Hikaru: HI!!!!!!!

Hikari: . . . whoa.

"Edward Elric, or Major Elric, has a report due in a day," mumbled the Colonel as he scribbled ferociously on a piece of parchment.

"A reminder to be passed on to Fullmetal. Got that, Lt. Hawkeye?" Hawkeye saluted.

"Yes Sir. Message to Edward Elric about a report due tomorrow." She left the room.

"Finally, some peace," he sighed. He thought about getting married, then having children, and . . .

"Lt. Colonel, you're fired!" screamed Bradley. "That was too unacceptable!"

"NOOOOOOOO!" he screamed.

Fullmetal came rushing into the room.

"Go away, Bradley, I need to talk to him in private."

He shooed him off then approached Roy.

"You're fired, eh? So, I don't have to obey you anymore, do I?"

Roy's eyes widened in surprise. No more Fullmetal running around doing his errands, chores, or orders! Just the thought of it scared him. He suddenly had a flower in his hand. He was handing it to Fullmetal. Slowly, the office turned into a green meadow full of flowers. "Ed, will you marry me?" the flower tuned into a ring. He noticed something. Ed's hair was down. He had so feminine eyes, glowing in the sun. His eyes slowly were dragged down, drawn to something big. Or, actually, some things. Edward had a chest!! 'Oh, my god!' Roy thought. 'Hotter than ever now!' "Roy! Roy! Roy! Wake up!" Roy drew himself to kiss Fullmetal. "Roy!" He could still talk while kissing?

"Roy, what the hell are you doing???" He opened his eyes, finding him and Fullmetal face-to-face. He was making kissy-lips, so he stopped immediately. Ed was on the wall, scrunched up as if Roy was after him. Well, he was, but not intentionally.

"I apologize, I was having a dream," he said dreamily.

"So, What did you want?"

"Colonel, I need to talk about the report," he watched him put down the piece of paper he tried to hand to him in his sleep.

"Yes?"

"I have to go out of town to visit my friend Ashley, and I will be gone for a week."

Roy raised an eyebrow. "So, you can't hand in the report? Perhaps you could hand it in when you get back. I will come to your dorm immediately in a week."

"But, sir, I will be with my friend the whole time, I wouldn't have time to do it!" he explained rapidly.

"Well, buh bye now."

Roy hurried to shove Fullmetal out the door as if nothing happened. Nothing had happened, hoped Mustang. If something did, Ed would be screaming at me right now. But, as a matter of fact, Ed was screaming.

"Tell me why you tried to flipping k" Ed stopped talking when Hughes walked into the room, smiling a slick smile that Hughes always smiled when Ed or Roy hints that they're in love, even though they aren't.

"Hello, boys, I was just taking a . . ." he fell silent when he saw Ed's hand on Roy's shoulder, trying to wriggle free of the Colonel's grasp. He was only holding him because it would make him go away faster. But Hughes thought otherwise.

"Er-I need to go my train leaves in 20 minutes."

"Where are you going, Ed?" Hughes asked suspiciously.

"To see a friend."

"Who?"

"Ashley,"

"OOOOOOoooooOOOOhhhhhhh! ED'S GOT A GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!" he screamed.

"Do not! She's a childhood friend NOT a girlfriend. Besides, I haven't seen her for 5 whole years."

"Reeeeeaaaaaallllyyy . . ."

"Whatever."

At the train station

"Bye, bye, Nii-san! Have fun!" Al waved at the person sitting beside the window. "Why can't I come?" he mumbled to himself. "Oh, whatever," he walked off silently.

"God, I HATE Hughes sooo much right mow . . ." Ed sighed.

He wanted to eat all of a sudden, his stomach growling loudly, but blending with the sound of the train's engine.

"WHEN is the trolley going to come around???" he screamed.

Just then, a cart full of sandwiches, candy, and other junk came rolling by.

"I need something to eat!" he yelled at the young woman. She turned around to reveal an ugly face of wrinkles and misplaced makeup. Obviously she was in her 50's, not 20's.

"Yes?" she asked in an old shaky voice.

"Er-never mind," he said while thinking that he lost his appetite because of her. He just sank back into his seat and slept.

"THE TRAIN HAS NOW ARRIVED AT BALLANOR CITY. PLEASE BE READY TO DEPART." The train operator's voice rang through the entire train.

"Who what where when why how???" Edward screamed. "I am not short as a seedling so shut up I . . ." he silenced when he realized he was alone.

"Oh. Er . . . I guess I'll pack up. Wait, where is Al???" he shook his head in every direction, scanning hopelessly for a big hump of metal.

"Arf, what's wrong with me? Alphonse isn't here, because she only wanted me . . . man, I miss him . . ." he sighed.

"'Scuse me . . . Are you . . . Edward Elric?"

He turned, and said, "Hi, yes I am, but who're you?"

"I am . . ."

Hahaha. Cliffhanger people. XD wait fer my next update. did it work? No flames? Well, R&R, people.