"Remember."
"He looks incredulous. "I've been trying to since I woke up in this room!"
"Well, try harder." He gives me the stare.
"Good! That's a start!"
"What is?"
"The old Gibbs stare! You gave it to all of us, Tony, McGee, me."
He looks at me in confusion before replying. "What are you talking about?!"
I grab his wrist and slap the back of my head with his hand. I can tell that this helps.
Then I know what to say to help him remember. "Ari…Ari killed Kate." I start crying. "And I—I killed Ari." I'm sobbing now.
"Your brother?"
"Yes." I keep sobbing.
"You killed your brother…to save me?"
It really was to save him, but my father had ordered me to. "Ari is becoming unstable. Kill him and get Agent Gibbs to trust you." But of course I can't tell him that, so I just nod. Then I step into his open arms, bury my head in his shoulder and cry harder than I have in a long time.
I cry for Ari, because I still miss him.
I cry for Kate, because I know that the others still miss her.
I cry for myself, because I am lying to a man who has been more of a father to me in less than a year than my own father has in my whole life.
And I cry for Gibbs, because not only has he had to twice endure the fresh pain of a tragic loss, he has had to endure the confusion and frustration of not knowing most of the people around him.
I can feel Gibbs patting my back, stroking my hair, and I cry even more because he is trying to comfort me even though he is crying too.
Later, I am in the bullpen with everybody else when I see Gibbs and Director Shepherd coming down from her office. He is resigned. She looks confused. And sad. I think I know what is coming.
He looks for his badge and gun, which Tony hands to him. He looks at them for a moment.
"You'll do." He hands his gun and badge back to Tony and places a hand on his shoulder. "It's your team now." Tony doesn't say anything. He just looks confused.
McGee is next. "Tim. You're a good agent. Don't let him tell you otherwise."
"I won't, Boss." He's trying to be stoic.
"Gibbs…" Abby sounds like she's about to cry. I don't know if I can handle any more crying today.
"Shh." He presses a finger against her lips and kisses her cheek.
He walks over to me. "I owe you, Ziva."
"I'll collect, Jethro." It seems like the right thing to say.
He looks over at Ducky. "Give me a ride home, Duck."
"Of course." It sounds as if they've already said goodbye. How is that possible?
Before he gets into the elevator, he turns around and looks at us.
"Semper Fi."