Phoenix had been working day and night on this case. His old pal Larry Buttz was in trouble again. But this time, he was being accused of something way worse than anything he had ever had to deal with in a case before - Serial Donkey Punching. But he knew Larry was innocent, and he had to make sure he was found not guilty!! But the biggest problem was that he was lacking evidence and still had no idea who the real criminal was. And today was the first day of the trial. He'd have to do what he always does - bullshit his way to some contradictions.
The trial was starting, and Larry was sweating buckets. Great. He look as suspicious as ever!
Godot was the prosecutor for this case, it was going to be though. But Phoenix knew he had to get Larry off the hook.
The prosecution calls it's first witness. Wendy Ol Bag!!
She stated her name and occupation for the court, and started her testimony...
"It was 11pm, and I was on my way home from the grocery store, when all of a sudden I heard a commotion down an alley way. I could only see shadows cuz it was dark, but then it happened! It was terrifying! One of the shadows donkey punched the other! I was so shocked I looked away, and then somebody running bumped into me, I turned to see Larry Buttz running away from the scene of the crime!!"
Phoenix made an incredulous face. Larry hadn't told him about this! Uuuugh!
Oh well, time for the cross-examination.
He pressed the statement about seeing Larry. How could she have seen him if it was dark? SCORE! It turns out she only saw "an orange blazer!" AHA! He was finally getting somewhere.
Just then somebody burst into the courtroom. It was...it was - WHAT THE HELL?!?! THE BLUE BADGER?!?!? It was a giant blue badger - or more accurately, somebody in a Blue Badger suit. Everybody looked shocked and the Judge hid under his podium. The Blue Badger furry ran over to Phoenix, the bells on it's head jingling. HEY PAL! It cried and a gigantic blue penis emerged from the fur suit. Phoenix was in shock, he couldn't move!
The Blue Badger bent Phoenix over the Defense stand and crammed it's giant blue furry dick up his ass. Phoenix screamed a blood curtling scream. Then the Blue Badger shot blue magic juice all over the court room, some hitting Ol Bag right in the face and then punched Phoenix in the back of his head and yelled DONKEY PUNCH PAL! The Blue Badger ran out of the courtroom, leaving behind a terrible scene. Phoenix was unconscious and Maya was crying over him. Wendy Ol Bag was just standing startled at the witness stand with blue skeet all over her face. Godot went to drink his coffee and realized it had blue goo. Yuck. The Judge had missed it all because he was hiding under his podium.
"Well, guess I'm not guilty now huh?" said Larry with grin and a thumbs up.
"I am now prepared to render a verdict on this case, after seeing the new evidence. I pronounce Larry Buttz...
NOT GUILTY!!"
Confetti explodes in the courtroom.