The keyboard clacked, in the night.
' "...Let us never be parted," Kaiba demanded with a swish of his cape. "I am the Prince of this land and I can make any law that I want around here."
Yugi felt his lips purse into a cat face. "I'm so happy honey!" The joy of spending all their days together made him swoon; he felt his legs give out from under him but luckily Kaiba was RIGHT THERE and he caught the smaller boy in his arms. The smell of Kaiba's musky scent made him even more delirious.
"Kiss me," Yugi breathed and the young Prince of the Underworld, Kaiba, bent down-" '
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
Kaiba's pen snapped in half, bathing his face in purple ink! He slammed down the battered pen and twirled around, trembling in anger.
"What am I doing?! Who dares to intrude on my personal office space when I am deep in important rich person business." And to his horror, he found himself face to face with his rival/friend/crush/fantasy object, YUGI HIMSELF!
"I came up here to challenge you to a round of naked twister- I MEAN, a card battle, and I find you sitting in the dark with only a buttoned up shirt on!" Yugi seemed really baffled as to how this could happen. I mean, who would sit in the dark with no pants on unless they were masturbating. And he wasn't masturbating. These two facts didn't clash in Yugi's small brain. He couldn't figure out how it could be possible. If he thought about it any longer, he would probably be crazy in a few minutes. So he decided to just go ahead and ask, I mean the worst thing that could happen would be that Kaiba would start masturbating, and it's not like he had never seen a dick before.
"So uh," Yugi mumbled and kicked at the ground. "Are you like, touching yourself in the dark?"
"NO!" Kaiba was totally mad.
"Why is your face purple then?"
"SHut the fuck up dude! I'm like, doing homework. Who let you in anyways?"
"The maids. THey like my hair."
Kaiba made a mental post-it note to fire the maids. They weren't real maids anyways; just some chicks from the local otaku cafe he sometimes patroned. They couldn't even clean a toilet correctly so he had to hire a lawyer with pointy hair do it.
"So, how come you're doing your homework without pants on? Does it help you think?" Yugi wondered if he could come up with some really cool strategy shit for a new card battle if HE worked on battle schemes while pantsless.
Kaiba looked very suspicious, shifting his eyes. "Uh, I dunno. I'm keeping it real, you know."
"Um, okay. So what's your homework about?"
"H-history?"
Yugi loved history! He ran forward spurred on by his desire to read about old people and ancient paintings. Kaiba tackled him along the way, causing Yugi to gag because he was being touched by a pantsless dude. But he still got his hands on the papers that Kaiba had been writing moments earlier.
"Wait a second," Yugi's enormous freakish eyes skimmed the page. "This is about me and you, Kaiba! What is this Underworld kingdom? Why is your house called the Fuck Palace?"
"Because it's like- stop reading that, ass!"
Yugi was horrified. This was history? "I can't believe it."
Kaiba began to pout but then Yugi began talking again. "We were lovers in a previous life?"
Seeing an opportunity to seize the moment, Kaiba snatched the papers away. "Yes. I did some research and we were totally gay lovers in a previous lifetime. Pretty fucked up huh? But, if you want, maybe it's not like a bad idea, huh?"
Yugi asked "Can we still have card battles?"
"Sure, I think gay dudes play with cards. And dicks and assholes, but I don't think the two passions are mutually exclusive."
Yugi thought about it deeply for about five milliseconds before he forgot what he was saying so he just said okay. Kaiba thought he was going to piss himself with joy, but managed to contain himself long enough to throw his fanfiction in a desk and then lead the spiky haired object of his desire to the bed. Sometimes, dreams really did come true, even fanfiction originated ones.