Author's Notes: Be warned that this piece has aspects of incest but does not go into detail. Let me know your thoughts of how I wrote it. Song by Alicia Keys called "Diary". I changed only a few of the words to fit the story more fittingly.
I OWN NOTHING (only plot).
Please read and review.
Fiyero held her close to him, watching her as she struggled to speak.
"Take your time Fae, I've got all night." He smiled at her, trying to see her through the scarce light that was coming in from the street. She writhed in his arms, wanting to bury herself in them and run out of them at the same time.
Lay your head on my pillow
Here you can be yourself
They lay there, in her dorm room for almost an hour before she had finally got enough courage to speak. "I'm sorry…"
He immediately came out of his haze, readying himself for her. "Sorry for what?"
"For telling you what I'm going to tell you…you don't deserve it."
He laid in silence, not speaking until he thought it necessary.
No one has to know what you are feeling
No one but me and you
For once she was glad that Galinda wasn't there, she knew that seeing them in the position they were in at what time they were awake, would hurt her even though her and Fiyero hadn't been together for months.
"I, I'm not…a…fuck." She muttered. It hurt to say it, but she had to tell him.
"A what Fae? Please tell me."
I won't tell your secrets
Your secrets are safe with me
I will keep, your secrets
Just think of me as the pages in your diary
"I know how close we've been getting…"
They had been getting close, almost going too far according to his own standards. He didn't want to rush anything with Elphaba, but the more they began to familiarize themselves with one another's lips and bodies, the harder it was getting for him to not act on his biological impulses.
"Yeah, I know…does that upset you?"
"No, of course not."
I feel such a connection
Even when you're far away
Oh baby, if there's anything that you fear
I'll be here
Oz, why was it so hard to do this? She knew he loved her, wanted to know everything that she knew. She had to tell him, she couldn't keep hiding from him any longer. This aspect was apart of her past, and even though she had tried to keep her past hidden she knew that Fiyero would find it eventually and it would hurt the both of them.
"I'm, not a virgin."
He was stunned. Didn't know what to think. What the hell do you say to that?
"It's alright. You know that I-"
"No, it's not." She said sternly, cutting him off. He felt her tense and held her closer. "It's not what I wanted."
Not what she wanted?
"Fae, I don't know what you mean-"
"It was the only time I felt my father have any feelings besides hatred for me."
Shit.
And only we know what is talked about baby
I don't know how you can be driving me so crazy
I'll be the loyalty you need, you can trust me
He didn't expect it. He'd never have known. He also knew that Elphaba would have never told anyone else in this entire world, not even her sister.
"I hate it. I hate not being able to share anything with you."
She spoke almost non-chalantly about the ordeal. How he'd entered her room. How he acted the day it happened. How old she was. How Nessarose almost found out. How he acted towards her the day after. How her life hadn't been much happier because of it. How she looked at sex after it.
"You have plenty to share with me Elphaba. Please heart, don't be afraid."
I won't tell your secrets
Your secrets are safe with me
I will keep, your secrets
Just think of me as the pages in your diary
She covered her face, small sobs becoming audible to the prince's ears. He pulled her towards him, burying her face into his chest protecting her from whatever would come their way. "I love you Fae…"
"Please…don't think of me differently…" she whispered to him, and if he hadn't been intently listening to her every breath he would have never heard it.
"Never."
I won't tell…I won't tell…
I won't tell…I
won't tell…
I won't tell…I
won't tell…
Your secrets,
your secrets