"These aren't too bad, Geordi," Beverly examined the lacerations left when his VISOR had been knocked off during the struggle in the turbolift. She cleaned them up and sprayed them with histo-compound. The small breaks in the skin would close in minutes. That done, she pulled back his sleeves and treated several scratches and bruises on his hands and forearms.
"You're not going to report this officially, Doctor…" It was a statement, not a question. More than a struggle, what had happened could only be defined as an assault, in Starfleet terms anyway.
Beverly cast a glance at the adjacent diagnostic bed where Alyssa Ogawa was tending to Leo, then looked into Geordi's blank eyes. They were as filled with tears as she knew her own must be.
"How can you even ask me that?" He was about to apologize when she put down her treatment supplies and gripped his shoulders with both hands. She repeated in a near-sob, "How can you even ask?"
Alyssa treated Leo's hands, banged and bruised from bouncing against the turbolift walls and from the frantic, enraged blows she'd showered on Geordi. Both wrists were ringed by bruises where Geordi had fought to restrain her. There were a few other marks and nicks here and there, but Leo shrank away once the major ones were seen to.
God, everyone is crying she thought to herself. What do I do next? She abandoned the overwhelming questions in favor of the everyday ones.
"I assaulted a superior officer," she said evenly. "We should file a report."
"No," Beverly and Geordi insisted in absolute unison.
Geordi clipped on his VISOR and got off the diagnostic bed to go to Leo and look her in the eye.
"No," he repeated softly.
Leo touched Geordi's face where the marks were fading. "I did that to you…" it was a stunned whisper, "Oh Geordi I'm sorry." She didn't comment on the tears that wet her fingers.
"It's okay." He put his arms around her, expecting her to break, and when she didn't he hugged her tight anyway for his own comfort. "No reports about this. It's okay."
She shook her head against his shoulder. "No. No it's not. None of it." She sat back and the apparent calmness in her face worried the others. "You're right, though. There's gonna be too many reports as it is."
The comlink chimed from Crusher's office. "Troi to sickbay, Beverly are you there?"
"On visual," Beverly announced as she reached her desk. "Right here, Deanna." Every viewscreen is a mirror now, she thought as she was confronted with her friend's pained face.
"The captain is on his way, he sustained some slight injuries while on the Scimitar. About Leo…" She described the scene after the destruction of the Scimitar, when Geordi had had to force Leo into the turbolift and on to sickbay per the captain's orders.
"You won't be surprised to know that Geordi got the worst of it." Beverly sighed and looked out into the treatment area. Alyssa was cleaning up, stopping every few seconds to wipe her eyes. Geordi stood in front of Leo where she still sat. He was holding her hands, saying nothing. "My god, Deanna, none of this seems real. It looks like Leo beat the hell out of Geordi, or as close as she could come. He managed to get her calmed down by the time they got here, but he sustained some facial cuts when she managed to knock off his VISOR. Scratches, bruises on both of them. It must have been quite a fight. I think she probably could have killed him if she had the chance." Beverly stumbled, horrified at the implication. "She'd never have done it, I don't know why I said that."
"We all say things we don't mean under these circumstances. How does she seem now?"
"Calm, a little vague. Horrified by what she did to Geordi."
Deanna nodded, "She's in shock. No surprise there. It's probably too soon for me to get involved." She caught her breath and shook her head as if to clear it, and her eyes. "I couldn't be effective anyway right now."
The next question was carefully measured. "Are you really sure Data's gone, are you absolutely sure he couldn't have found some way to escape the explosion?" Beverly tried not to sound desperate.
"I understand," Deanna told her. "But the Captain told us the last thing he saw before he was beamed here, the last thing that happened before the Scimitar exploded, was Data aiming his phaser at a plasma weapon. I wish I could be wrong, oh gods Beverly I wish," she stopped herself,and regained control. "Make sure Leo doesn't go off on her own."
"Geordi's with her. I don't think he's likely to leave her alone. I'll talk with you later."
Deanna heaved an exhausted sigh. "More than you, my friend. Troi out."
When Beverly returned to the treatment area she interrupted another, quieter struggle between Leo and Geordi. Leo was trying to go to the door, and Geordi had hold of her arm.
"You can't return to duty," Geordi was arguing, "we don't even know what that is yet, we have to wait for orders from Starfleet." It was clear enough to him that, for the moment anyway, logic was a lost cause. Leo clearly was on autopilot.
"That's just it," she shook him off. "The return and repair logistics have to be initiated for engineering, reports have to be outlined so we can have them ready for Starfleet by the time we get back. I have to get the materials requirements from the departments so I can coordinate the requisitions for all the repairs, and the casualty reports," there she cut off cold, and looked for a minute as if she were shuffling her internal files to shove some of them far out of reach. Not unlike Data, but then the two of them had proven that sort of analog long ago. "It can't just all stop," Leo insisted.
What a contrast to just over a month ago when she'd begged for time to stand still, for just a few hours, as they danced that night when the only imagined losses were temporary. Geordi didn't know how to answer, so he didn't. Leo turned and raced out the door, and collided with Captain Picard on his way in. He steadied her as they recovered their (physical) balance and they stared at one another for several seconds.
"I was reporting to the ready room, to get recovery and return underway," she told him. Urgently, but detached from the reality that made the tasks necessary. Picard glanced over Leo's shoulder and took in the expressions on Beverly and Geordi, saw the remnants of Geordi's injuries and knew what had caused them. "That won't be necessary. You can return to your quarters," he only realized then what a mistake he'd made, "that is, you mustn't return to duty now. Commander Riker is handling the arrangements for recovery and return and will be assisted by Lieutenant B'rok. Commander Tassaverde has replaced… has returned to his post of Second Officer and Operations."
"Uh-uh, no sir," Leo declared. As Picard proceeded into sickbay Leo retreated in front of him. "The commander is out of practice, if you don't mind my saying so, and B'rok is a newbie." She ignored Picard's reference to Tassaverde. "And there's really no need for me to return to quarters," she paused and the others could see her shudder as if horrified by the thought. "Captain please, I need to get some work done!" She gripped his torn sleeve, "I need to work!"
The captain looked once again at Beverly and Geordi. The entire crew was reeling from the news that had spread throughout the ship, and his senior staff were tasked with managing their emotions and performing the extraordinary duties that would be required in the days to come. There was no time for this; he wasn't up to the confrontation anyway. Counselor Troi would have her hands full (once she'd steadied them, he realized painfully) but dealing with Leo's reaction to Data's death (there, he'd thought the word at least) must be left to her expertise.
He was dirty, bleeding, and struggling with his own emotions, but Picard's voice and demeanor canceled all of that out. He jerked his arm sharply from Leo's grip and stepped back formally.
"Lieutenant O'Reilly," he barked. "Stand ready!"
The "autopilot" Geordi and Beverly had witnessed earlier instantly was replaced by another, more conditioned imperative. Leo stood at attention.
The captain's voice was as hard as his expression. "Lieutenant, this is my ship, or what's left of it anyway, and it is under my command. I have altered crew assignments accordingly, and have issued my orders. You are to report to your quarters immediately and arrange a meeting with Counselor Troi at your earliest opportunity. That's earliest opportunity, Lieutenant, not your earliest convenience. I've instructed the counselor to communicate with me when you've done that, and if you have not. If I find you haven't contacted her by 0800 hours tomorrow you will report to the ready room to explain why you have disobeyed my direct orders. And just so there is no confusion, I will reiterate that those are direct orders. Is that clear, Lieutenant?"
It sounded like a death sentence to her. How could she go back there alone? How could she have nothing to occupy her mind and time but… what? What happens next? I don't even know what's happening now.
"Yes sir."
"Commander LaForge," the captain continued, "accompany the lieutenant to her quarters, and await my orders."
"Aye, sir." Geordi took Leo's hand and tucked it in his elbow. "Come on, I'll take you home," he told her quietly.
She attempted a whispered protest, as if nobody else could hear. "Geordi, please," she breathed desperately, "I don't wanna…"
"Ssh, come on," he shushed her gently. "It'll be okay."
Her tearful "No it won't," trailed behind them as the door hissed shut.
Picard stood silent and motionless in the center of the treatment area.
One eye on him, Beverly suggested, "Alyssa, why don't you take a break, I'll call you when I need you again."
"Of course." Ogawa left without further comment.
By now Picard was standing by the diagnostic bed, leaning on it with head bowed. "I didn't enjoy that, you know."
"Of course you didn't," Beverly told him as she gathered some treatment supplies and stood next to him. "We both know how she is. Reasoning would be a waste of time right now, but she'd always follow your orders no matter what." When he didn't reply she touched his shoulder. "Jean Luc, you did her a favor."
"Did I really?" When he lifted his head the anguish on his face shook her. "Then why do I feel as if I've just beamed her into space along with Mr. Data?" He gasped a breath. "My god, Beverly, how did we go from 'steady as she goes' to 'straight to hell' with such blinding speed?"
She put down her medical supplies and gripped his shoulders firmly. "Don't, Jean Luc. I know what you're thinking, but don't. Being captain isn't the same as being god, no matter how much you want it to be. If you need to blame someone blame Starfleet for convincing you that you should be."
"All the time we've known him he wanted to be human, what cruel force decided he could only achieve that by saving my life and destroying his own?"
"I don't know," she said honestly. She gave in then, because she was out of reasons not to, "I don't know." When she dropped her head on his shoulder Picard returned the miserable embrace.
They stood there for a long time as Beverly vented her grief, and Picard held her dry-eyed and angry and howling inside at Shinzon and Starfleet and everything else that allowed steady as she goes to go straight to hell, taking all the wrong people with it.