The sunset was exquisite at Camp Jaha. The sky exploding with scarlet and golden rays. After all this time Bellamy was still amazed at earth's beauty. He stood alone looking out at the tree line Clarke had disappeared into. Well, not disappeared, she had left. Something Bellamy was only beginning to truly realize.

The sun was kissing the horizon, and Bellamy no longer found the sight so beautiful. He didn't really think Clarke would come back, but part of him had hoped that if she did it would be before the sun set. Bellamy heard someone walk up to his side.

Without looking over he knew who it was. Although she had injured people to attend to, Bellamy noticed Abby walking by the entrance hoping to see Clarke make her way back. They were both fooling themselves.

"We need to go after her." Abby said with the force of a chancellor and love of a mother. "She shouldn't be out there alone."

Bellamy could hardly keep himself from flinching at her words. She shouldn't be by herself. She shouldn't have to bear all of that guilt alone. She wouldn't have let him do that. Bellamy turned to Abby and replied, "No. No she shouldn't. But Clarke's gone. She left and what could we really do to stop her?"

"You could've stopped her, she respects your opinion, Bellamy. I think even more than mine." She laughed quietly and without any humor behind it. Abby turned her face to look once more to the trees. Her eyes welled with tears.

"Do you think she'll come back? Ever?"

"I don't know. Before today I wouldn't have thought she would've left like that ever. She isn't herself. And maybe she won't ever be again." He said thoughtfully. "But I do think we will meet again, Abby. Don't lose faith in that…"

Bellamy felt his throat swell with emotions that he felt the moment Clarke had said she wouldn't come inside the camp with him. he'd rather not face them again. Not tonight. The sun had abandoned the sky. The moon shone brightly, but the darkness made everything seem more bleak than before.

The camp was celebrating behind Bellamy and Abby. Their people were back. Families reunited. The sky people together at last. There were large fires with people singing and laughing around them. Bellamy knew he couldn't celebrate after what it took to get everyone here. But he never thought he would have to do it alone.

And for a moment Bellamy hated Clarke for leaving him. For leaving everyone behind. For trying to take all the pain and guilt upon herself as if somehow that would make it hurt less. As if it would take away the guilt that Bellamy had to carry. He still could see all the mountain men dead. The innocent. The children. All of them because of what they did.

There was no other way, but that never made him feel better. They were supposed to bear it together. Like they always did. He couldn't be angry at Clarke for long, but what emotions replaced his anger were more oppressive and persistent. Bellamy needed a drink.

He looked to the trees once more for any sign of Clarke's golden hair. He saw nothing. He turned his back from the trees and Abby and walked deeply into Camp Jaha at last. It was an amazing sight to behold. Both the young and old alike together once more. With no fear that the air they breath wouldn't last. So many families brought together again. He spotted Octavia, Lincoln, Jasper, and Monty sitting around a fire with others from the original hundred a few yards to his left. Bellamy saw them passing around a bottle of alcohol.

Most smiled and looked like the world had been set right. Except for Jasper, who held in his hands tightly his own personal bottle. Octavia sat closely next to Lincoln whispering into his ear, and him in hers. Monty seemed to be in his own world staring deeply into the flames before him. Bellamy thought about joining them, and then he decided against it. He needed to be alone.

It didn't take long for Bellamy to find a bottle of his own. Many were out in the open by every fire. On the Ark there was alcohol, but it was under strict control. Today it seemed that everyone wanted to put that life behind and start anew. Tonight was one to be celebrated. With lots of alcohol.

Bellamy took a bottle of scotch and found a dark and empty space by the edge of camp. A large broken piece of the Ark lay on the ground, and Bellamy sank to the ground with his back against it and opened the bottle unceremoniously. He took a swig of the scotch. It burned slightly, but it helped the thoughts of the day to ebb away slowly.

Bellamy tried not to think at all, but unwillingly images and memories of Clarke came to him with tortuous clarity. First the time he taught her to shoot a gun, and the way she loved it. That might have been the first time he had seen her truly happy about something.

Then the way their entire relationship changed that day when she said she needed him, which now seemed like an eternity ago. Him wanting to leave everything behind, and Clarke pulling him back from the edge. He took another swig from his bottle. And another. All of that guilt. No one had forgiven Bellamy for what he had done until Clarke. She had given him absolution, and with her everyone else. Letting Clarke leave alone weighed heavily on Bellamy now.

Another memory surfaced, of Clarke seeing Bellamy for the first time since she had closed the drop ship. Her smile and embrace. It had surprised Bellamy at first. Clarke and Bellamy had been leaders together. Friends even. But he didn't realize how much she cared if he lived or died until that moment. Although she was small, her hug was warm and strong.

Bellamy took one more. Two more. Three more swigs from his bottle of scotch. Bellamy couldn't tell if he was drunk or not, but he wished he was. His vision blurred but he realized he had started to cry. He wiped away his tears angrily from his face.

Bellamy needed Clarke. He hadn't realized how much he had come to depend on her. She made him want to float himself sometimes, but he respected her like no one else. Her bravery and wit were irreplaceable, and now she was just gone.

Bellamy wasn't a fool enough to think he could go and find her. She would never forgive him if he left their people, and risked his life to find her when she didn't want to be found. But Bellamy still wanted to. He wanted to go find her and save her from herself. He wanted to be her hero. Instead he was sitting under the stars alone drinking for both of them. Bellamy raised his bottle into the air.

"To the sky people. And Clarke, may we meet again." Okay, so maybe he was drunk.

Bellamy placed the cap back on his bottle now half empty and unsteadily stood up. He wouldn't finish his scotch tonight. He would save a drink for him and Clarke. They would meet again. That's what they always did. And when they did they would share a drink and celebrate.

Bellamy walked once more towards the entrance of Camp Jaha as if pulled to it against his will. Abby, was no longer standing waiting for Clarke, and the rest of the camp had become quiet and peaceful. Most people were sleeping or whispering around the dying fires.

Bellamy looked out not surprised at all to see nothing but trees. He wondered where Clarke was. If she was in the forests by a fire of her own, or maybe she went back to the drop ship where everything had started. Maybe even back to Mnt. Weather.

Wherever she was Bellamy wished she knew she wasn't alone. That she didn't have to be alone. And that when she decided that she didn't need to be alone, that he would be here waiting for her. Waiting with a million questions and a saved bottle of scotch to share for the day they meet again.

A/N: This is how I deal with Bellarke/the 100 withdrawals. Seriously guys this hiatus is killing me, thank goodness we only have a month left. Here is just a little story that's been stuck in my head about what Bellamy did once Clarke left. It's based on how she asked him to have a drink for her in their goodbye scene in "Blood Must Have Blood pt2". I may be convinced to write a part 2 for this in Clarke's Pov if this gets enough positive feedback.