Always
Pairing: Dave/Carolyn
Summary: Now he had to learn to forgive himself. Post – ep for Season 7 episode 06 – Epilogue.
Disclaimer: I don't own them. I'm just playing with them.
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Dave unfolded the blanket and spread it across the carefully manicured grass. He knelt down and pulled the picnic basket closer before digging inside. He pulled out a small broom and proceeded to sweep the grass detritus off the two nearby stone slabs; one protruding and the other buried in the grass. He put the broom away and pulled out an iPod and a small pair of speakers. After plugging the devices together he flipped a switch on the speakers then scrolled through the iPod.
Soon the soft sounds of Patsy Cline singing filled the air. Dave took a deep breath and let it out slowly then reached into the basket again and pulled out a bottle of wine. In less than a minute he had the bottle open and had poured a generous amount into a plastic wine glass. He settled onto the blanket and let himself get lost in the music.
Carolyn had insisted that this song, Always, be their song. He had wanted it to be Dean Martin's Mambo Italiano which was his favorite song. Carolyn had hated that song. And though he played that song for hours teaching her how to dance to it with him she refused to let it be played at the reception. It still irked him reminding him of a few drawn out disagreements. But Patsy – she brought fond memories. He closed his eyes and pictured he and Carolyn dancing at the wedding reception. They had promised to keep these lyrics as part of their wedding vows. Even after their divorce when both had re-married they honored this part of their vows.
He took a shuddery breath as he felt the tears prick his eyes. In the end, he hadn't been able to honor that vow. He had been raised to be an honorable man and until that moment when their son died he had been that man. Then his world fell apart. Neither of them blamed the other but it became a wedge between them. By the time they realized what had happened the chasm was so wide they couldn't mend it.
Dave tried to fill that hole by sleeping with any woman he could find. His honorable side popped up twice and he ended up in loveless marriages that did more damage to his already shattered heart. At least he had avoided addiction to drugs or alcohol. Though now he had a reputation as a womanizer and no decent woman would give him a second glance. He swiped recklessly at the tears that escaped the corners of his eyes and took a deep drink from his glass.
Professionally, he was a man above his peers. Even while he was ruining his personal life he had managed to make a name for himself as a profiler and a writer. He glanced at the headstone to his right. After Carolyn's second marriage she still kept his last name. Dave reached out and traced his fingers across her name even in death she would still be his. All she ever wanted from him was all he had given her. She knew without saying that her last request was something he could never fulfill and she forgave him. Now he had to learn to forgive himself.
He finished his wine and began packing things back into the basket. He had brought food but he wasn't comfortable actually eating in a cemetery. He made sure the wine bottle was sealed then packed up the iPod and speakers. Slowly, he climbed to his feet. After shaking off the grass he folded the blanket and placed it back in the basket as well. Sighing softly he gave both markers one last glance then picked up the basket and walked away.
The end
Always
By Patsy Cline
I'll be loving you, always
With a love that's true, always
When the things you plan
Need a helping hand
I will understand, always, always
Days may not be fair, always
That's when I'll be there, always
Not for just an hour
Not for just a day
Not for just a year, but, always
Days may not be fair, always
That's when I'll be there, always
Not for just an hour
Not for just a day
And, not for just a year, but, always