Sadness and hatred entered her body as they left for their trip. He loved them so much, why would they leave him? Of course, it was what that bastard said, "You shouldn't even come. You're useless,". Useless, he felt it eat at him. He wasn't useless, he was smart and funny. He would work and be a good person, so why was he useless? Tears trickled off his face, he was sobbing uncontrollably. The feeling of worthless entered him because if you are useless you are worthless. Lastly, he thought of himself as nothing because if you are worthless you are nothing. He just laid on his bed, it felt extra soft. He woke up extra early and cleaned himself to boot, he would have never done this for just anyone. But this was his loved ones, they were like his family. Pain would usually stay hidden until they left, it was a bad habit, never to show his feeling in front of people, it would embarress him and make him feel weak. Unless, it was the one he truly loved. He thought of last night, remembering with pure joy.
Flashback
I am not sad, I just don't feel good. He slit his left wrist once, releasing a soft moan. The blood was trying to get out, he wiped it. I'm actually quite...happy. He pushed the razor blade onto the same slit and pulled it across without letting up, he bit his lip, blood came out a bit more than last time. Mother, I'm sorry. You wouldn't like this, would you? I'm so sorry for being a masochist... He slashed again and again and watched the blood come out slowly. Well, this sucks. I want to have a handful of blood!!! Maybe if I cut it hard enough. He pushed down hard and pulled it, then it started to bleed alot. Ohmygod! This is great, look at it all. It soon filled up his hand and he panicked. Th-this is too much!!! I've got to get the paper towels. He struggled for the paper towels, trying not to get blood on his bed sheets. He pulled a bunch of them, putting it on his cut and pouring the red liquid onto it, he sighed in relief. He only got a few drops on his bed. All in all, he lost a bit of blood, which made him happy. He smiled and went to sleep, since it was so late. Goodnight mommy.
end flashback
He wiped his eyes and started to prepare his lunch, he was starving. By now, they were probably having fun. He sighed and phoned them...Riiing..Riiing...Riiiing...Beep..Beep. He stared at the phone that was not ringing anymore. What the...? He grew a bit mad, then phoned again. ...Riing..Riing.."Hello?" it was the bastard, Kai.
"Where's Max?" he said, uncomfortable talking to the one who hurt his feeling and made him sob. A pause then, "He's in the store, he wanted some candy," Kai said, with his usual monotone voice. He whinced. "Well, can I talk to him?" he asked, being impatient. Bastard.
"Hmm... I'll tell him to call you when he getts back," Kai said. Yeah right.
"Okay, bye." ...Beep...Beep. He stared at the phone and hung up. He put water into a pot and on the stove. He turned it on high and went to sit on the couch. Am I really this useless? I mean, I can do a lot of things. A lot better than Kai too. He looked back at the water and it was boiling, he ran over to the kitchen and put in the soup mix and turned it down.
Two hours later, Max never phoned. He was just sitting on the couch, staring at the blank t.v. screen. He didn't know what to do, he was so lonely and tired. Sleeping was an option, but he wasn't that tired. He just sat there, gloomily, waiting. He sighed and went to his dark, angsty room. He laid down on his bed and cried. He should have went, he would have been having fun right now, eating, laughing. He looked at his wrist and groaned. Might as well... He found his razor blade and began to slice his wrist, sure, it was painful, but the pain in his heart was much more hurtful than this. The tears were falling off his face, the blood was dripping down faster each time he slashed away. Why...? He laid down and let the blood run onto his bed and put stains on them in an instant. Th-this hurts, why won't you help me though, mom? What'd I do to be left alone? I'm sorry for being weak, I'm sorry for my existance.