Another fight. Then other. Our life together it's just fight. We were 14 when he asked me out and I accepted. He looked so loving and caring. I remember that he was all the time complimenting me and saying that loved me. At the start, I was playing hard to get. Making he follow me, kiss me, then play hard to get again. In the start everything was going so right, that the future seemed bright for us. And there was going for 3 years.
But a few months ago, Gunther, Ty and Jonas went to a little party. And his first time drinking didn't go the right way. Ty and Jonas tried to make him stop to drink in that day but he denied. I was in my house and my mom was traveling to New York. So she was going to be our for about 1 month. Flynn too.
After two or three hours, Ty and Jonas brought him back my house and told me to make him rest a little. But he was drunk,when I was going to take him to my bed, he wouldn't go. So I forced him. Bad move; he slapped me. I rubbed my cheek and he started to talk things like:
"No, leave me alone." I grabbed his arms and he said:
"No, I wanna go."
I denied it, and he did it again. Slapped me harder. I said to him:
"Stop slapping me, I'm your girlfriend, jerk!"
"Then let me go, I want to drink."
He got up and went to the door. I ran behind him and grabbed his arm, but he just pushed me to the floor. I got up and slapped him on the face. His eyes were so big filled with anger and hate, that I ran to the bathroom and he ran behind me.
"CECE, COME BACK HERE RIGHT NOW!"
I didn't obey him, just locked my door. Suddenly the whole apartment was silent, and I slowly unlocked the door. Then he jumped across me, and I was scared, afraid of what he was going to do. He said to me:
"Don't you ever, ever slap me on the face again, okay?! Ever!"
"Same to you, Gunther!" And he slapped me one more time.
"FINE! I'M SORRY!" I started to cry and he left. And again he was going to drink. That was the 1st time of billion.
After 3 hours he came back home. He looked at me and slapped me again.
"Gunther, stop it, this isn't you, why are you slapping me?"
"Shut up, don't talk anymore!"
I slapped him again,and said:
"If you drink again, we're over."
"Then fine!"
"I'm sorry?"
"We're over!"
I cried again. How could he replace me for drinks?
"What? How can you replace me for drinks?! We're together for three years!"
"I'm sorry Cece, we're not fairy tales!"
I cried all over again. I didn't know drinks could do that to him.
I woke up in my bed, and felt something heavy on my tummy. I looked and it was Gunther's arm. I pulled away as fast as I could, so I just fell on the floor. He looked at me and I had a frightned look on my face. I started to cry silently, just the tears running down my cheek. I started to drag myself till the wall. He got up and walked till me, and I was still scared. He was across me, just a feel centimeters between us. He touched my chin, making me look at him, but I pulled my face away. He was following my face, and then I looked at him.
"Look at what you did to me, you fucking jerk."
I said rubbing my cheek, which was still hurting. He looked at it, putted his hands on both sides of my face and I was looking at the floor. He tried to kiss me:
"I'm sorry..I didn't want to hurt you."
I denied to kiss him so he tried again. I was trying to get out of there, to pull him away, I was with my hands on his chest, crying, looking away and he was pulling me closer. I didn't want to live this nightmare anymore, if he was going to do the same again, we were over. He kissed me and I kissed him back. I don't know why, but I did. I love him, it's more than obvious, but he can't do this anymore. He kissed me again, and I was hoping that it was a kind of 'hope kiss'. But it wasn't. I kissed back, and he took his shirt off. Then he took my shorts off, leaving me in a little shirt, and underwear. He grabbed my legs and wrapped around his waist, then led me to my bed and kissed me again, on my neck, my cheeks, behind my ear, but...All I could do was cry. Cry for love, cry for hate, and for pain. For discover that my boyfriend had turned everything I didn't want him to. We started to make love, all the time he said he loved me. But I couldn't believe him. Every time he entered me I pulled him closer. He was totally on top of me, and I could feel every part of his body. I remember every moan, every touch, every word, every time he entered me, every time I dig my nails in his back. Every single promise. Yes, promise. I asked him:
"P-promise me, Gunther..."
"What?"
"Y-you'll always love me, never will hit me again and we'll be together forever." I said. He entered me harder, making me moan louder. After this, he looked up at me, and still inside of me, said:
"I promise you."
I kissed him,and he got off of me, then got up. I got up too, and was going to the bathroom, but he grabbed my arm, and I looked at him.
"I'm sorry, Cece. For hitting you."
"It's okay..."
I needed to talk with Rocky, and tell everything to her. He got dressed and I was already there, scared if he was going to drink. He smiled and said:
"I'm not going to drink."
"I hope..." I said silently.
I was suspected because he didn't tell me where he was going. But by the way, I went to Rocky and sat on her couch. She asked what was wrong and I told her the story.
"Cece, you should broke up with him."
"What? Why?"
"Cece you're still asking me why? Cece, they say that: 'When your boyfriend/husband start to drink, you have to break up. Because he'll start to be more violent and probably you'll suffer domestic violence.' Cece, I know you love him but it's the best for you."
"What? No! And what about him? I'll not leave him in this dirty world of drinks, and he can't turn a drunk! If I break up with him, at least I'll try to save him!"
"Cece...Gunther is hopeless. He's already lost in this world."
"I'll help him!"
"Cece you can't! Stop it, can't you see that he'll turn a stupid drunk that will get in trouble, and probably go to jail?! He's not worth it, and he'll bring problems to you!"
"Fine, but I'll help him. And you should be supporting me!"
"Support you to help you to end up your life like that? Never."
"I'm not ending up my life Rocky! I'm just wanting to save him!" I started to cry and Rocky hugged me.
"Fine, Cece...Everything will be fine... Don't worry." Everything will be fine was what my mom told me when my grandfather was with Cancer...But it wasn't fine. Will be the same with Gunther? I'm afraid so.
When I got home, Gunther wasn't there. He promised that he was going to get home 8pm, and already were 11pm, and he wasn't here. I saw his phone and saw the last message that he received. In a dance club? I knew where it was, so I got there immediately and saw him dancing with another girl. First drink, now cheat? How am I going to take this? I looked at him with hate and he saw me. Then I got out of there and entered in my car, Gunther then followed me:
"Cece, let me explain!"
"You don't need to explain, my eyes already explained me."
I entered in my car and he stopped across it. I screamed:
"Get the hell out of the way or I'll pass you up!"
"Not till you let me explain!"
I sped up my car and he got out of the was by jumping to his left side. I went to my home with my car on the maxim velocity, and arrived home. After 15 minutes, he was there.
"What the hell you think you're doing?!" He asked me.
"What the hell you think YOU are doing, Gunther! First, you get home drunk, hit me, slap me on the face three times, push me to the floor and leave me alone in my home crying, in pure shock state! Now, I see you dancing with a slut that was rubbing herself on you like a whore! What were your intentions with her later? Fuck her?" I threw a plate on him, but he tossed himself on the floor, so it didn't reach him.
"No! Just dance!"
"Dance? What, lap dance?!"
"No, just dance!"
"Why didn't you call me then, Gunther?"
"Because you were going to talk with Rocky!"
"And what about yesterday?"
"Yesterday what?"
"Why did you slap me?" I said crying, and throwing another plate on him, but that one went to the wall.
"I don't know!" He went to me, and said. I slapped him on the face.
"No reason? You slapped me, pushed me to the floor for no reason?"
"I think so.."
"You idiot! I hate you! How could you?" I said, while I slapped him again, and was punching him on the chest. He hugged me,while I was doing this, but I didn't stop ,then we fell on the floor. He was on the top of me, holding my wrists, and I finally stopped tossing myself. He had his legs on both sides of me and when I stopped to kick and punch him,he was looking at me:
"You stopped now?" I nodded.
He got off of me, and I sat on the floor, leaning my back against a wall. He sat on the other side, in same position as me. I was thinking about what was happening to us. We were so happy, every time we were kissing, going out together, making love promises, hugging each other. We were so happy that Rocky was in 'awwwe' every time see saw us. We were a example to the others couples, everyone congratulated us for our happiness, and all the teachers of the school made funny questions, like:"Where's going to be the wedding?", or "Did you propose to her, Gunther?", or even "Will you two invite me to your wedding?" But now our life together is...this. Where was the Gunther I knew?
Romantic, polite, gentle, responsible, and loving? Where was the old 'us'? I want to be that happy couple again. I want my old Gunther. When I looked down I saw Gunther giving me a teddy bear, with a little flower in it. And he was so distant of me, that I should've been thinking too much. By the way, Gunther had a little teddy bear in his hand,with a flower in it. I looked at his face and he smiled to me while shrugged. I grabbed the bear, and putted beside me. Then I remembered that this little teddy bear was the teddy bear that he gave me on our first date.
"What is happening with us?" He asked me.
"I don't know. But I know that I want this nightmare to end, because...I miss that couple that we were. Do you remember? We were so happy together that everyone was jealous of us."
"I remember. And I want it too."
"Let's try this again?"
"Yes. Let's give a chance for our love. I love you too much."
"I love you too. No matter what happen, you'll always be my hero."
He kissed me. We went to my room and we started to make love. But this time, not in a 'forgive' way. In a restart way, giving a try to forget this war that was happening.