disclaimer: not mine, rated t for non-sexual content

a/n: yeah, been a while since I wrote anything. I promised to write this oneshot a long time ago, at onlylivingboy's request. i'll be updated both 'dawn' and 'color me cool' soon enough, loves. until then, ladies and gentlemen, I give you my take on stacey in my little 'before we grow up' world.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Blonde Ambition

Slowly, I twirled my straw around a transparent red cup filled with diet soda. The ice clinked against the sides. I considered leaning over and blowing bubbles in it, recalling how that would make me giggle when I was a kid. I sighed loudly and burned holes into the side of Mary Anne's head with my eyes. She just went on smiling, nodding, and occasionally throwing in a "Yeah, I know!" or a "He's not kidding!" as Logan, who's sometimes around and sometimes not, discussed football games, football practice, possibly even the shape and feel of a football with his cousin, Lewis. Mary Anne appeared fascinated. I know she isn't. She hates football. She's very good and being the good girlfriend. Me, I get bored easily. I cannot pretend to have fun when I'm not.

Don't get me wrong. Lewis is cute. Very cute. He's in military school, but he's in town to visit his family. Mary Anne asked me to come out with the three of them. Long, long ago, Lewis and Dawn were an item. These days, Dawn is a shut-in, a closet crackhead or something, and Lewis is a senior and cute and on a "date" with me.

I looked him over for the billionth time that night. He was tall, muscular... he looked older than eighteen. The eighteen-year-old guys I happen to know, anyway. Must be the military training.

Problem is, he, his cousin, and his cousin's girlfriend, are boring the living daylights out of me right now.

I sighed loudly again, hoping someone would take pity on me. Lewis glanced my way briefly and shot me a smile. I smiled back and raised one eyebrow at him. I haven't really had the opportunity to flirt with him, yet.

So there I sat, swirling my soda, picking at a cold piece of pizza on my plate, saying nothing. More and more, though, Lewis would glance my way, and more and more, I would send him flirty little smiles, or lean over to show a little cleavage, or flip my hair.

After what seemed like two hours, Logan finally fell silent. His hands started finding Mary Anne, and he started looking at her like she was dessert. Mary Anne says she's thinking about sleeping with him at Junior Prom. Logan's been pressuring her a lot lately. I don't know what to think of all that. They've been together for a long time, so maybe it's right. Of course, the break up once every fifteen minutes or so...

Mary Anne and Logan became occupied with each other. Lewis finally looked at me for longer than a few seconds. "So, Stace. How's life?"

"Non-stop excitement." I replied in a dull voice.

"What is there to do around here?"

I shrugged. Nothing, there is nothing to do. I could suggest sneaking off to New York, but since the last time my mom caught me she's gotten very strict about my 1AM curfew. "Not much to the old 'brook" I replied, glancing at Mary Anne and Logan and rolling my eyes. Mary Anne never used to be one to kiss her guy in public.

Lewis glanced over and looked slightly green himself. Probably watching his cousin make out is not so much a turn on for him. He looked back at me. "Want to get out of here?"

I did. Lewis had come in his own car, an old silver Trans-Am. I am perfectly aware of the Trans-Am stereotype, but it's a hot car nonetheless. I glanced at my watch. It's only ten.

"What did you have in mind?" I asked. Not in a flirty way. Just curious.

"Getting away from this?" He replied, gesturing to his cousin. "Maybe take a drive, find some place to get some ice cream?"

I didn't feel like explaining why ice cream was out. Sure, I cheat once in a while, but I'm feeling a little too thirsty tonight and know I have pushed my blood sugar far enough. I smiled at Lewis. "Yeah, why not? We can get something from the Rosebud to go. I know a perfect little place we can have a mini picnic."

He grinned, thumping his cousin on the shoulder a few times to get his attention. Logan didn't seem to care that we were leaving. Mary Anne just said for me to call her later. Lewis threw a twenty on the table and followed me outside into the cool March air. I zipped my jacket and smiled as Lewis held the passenger door of the car open grandly for me.

Once inside he started the car and turned on the heater, letting it warm for a few minutes. The radio blasted a country song. I did my best not to gag. He is from Kentucky, after all.

We took the short drive to Rosebud, where Lewis told me to stay in the car and keep warm. I asked him to just order me a diet soda. He shook his head, muttering "Women..." with a good-natured smile.

Rosebud didn't take long. Lewis came bounding out with a small bag and a soda in no time. He smiled as he handed me my drink. "I got two scoops. Just in case."

"Mmm. Maybe." I replied with a smile. Maybe one little bite. We'll see.

Lewis shrugged and put his arm on the back of my seat as he turned around to back out. His finger touched my shoulder as he did, drawing a little circle. I had taken off my coat and resisted the urge to shiver at his touch. Something about Lewis just screamed "Man!" and not "High School Boy!" and I knew he was different than any of the other guys I've ever gone out with.

Still, I gave him directions to a favorite make out spot in Stoneybrook. On the ritzy side of town there is a group of houses on a hill that looks over the ocean. At the top of the road there is a dead end, and if you turn the car around and park the view is gorgeous. I instructed Lewis to do just that. He turned off the car and nodded approvingly. "Nice spot."

"Yeah." I replied. I sipped my soda. Lewis took his ice cream out of the bag and offered me the first bite. I declined politely and asked him about school.

He talked a little bit about it, about loving the organization and discipline, about how he wants to go to West Point but doesn't have the grades for it, about his ambition to be a General before he's thirty-five. I listened with some interest. I like politics and economics, almost as much as I like math. But he lives so far away. There's no point in falling for him.

When he offered me a bite for the fifth time, I finally gave in and took it. He insisted on feeding it to me. As I took it I closed my eyes and shivered a bit. Ice cream is not something I have often. "Mmmm..." I moaned, washed in chocolate pleasure.

I opened my eyes slowly and sighed with content. Lewis smiled. "You're not cold, are you?"

"Maybe just a little..." I replied. Quite, actually. The ice cream didn't help. I waited for him to turn the car on to blast the heater again, but instead, he slid closer to me, draping his arm around me. With his hand on my right shoulder, he prodded me to turn toward him, which I did. I mean, usually I won't make out with a guy on the first date, but this being potentially our only date, and considering I'm the one that directed him to a make out spot, I figure, why not? So I met his lips, which immediately parted, and my mouth was washed in the flavor of chocolate once again. I sighed with content, both for the chocolate and the kiss.

We kissed for a long time, so long that my chin started burning from the scratch of his stubble of beard. That was a nice feeling, slightly uncomfortable yet relaxing at the same time. I decided I could get used to Real Men and not High School Boys.

Suddenly he fell backward and I gasped in shock, pulling away from him. Lewis chuckled, and I realized he'd simply reached under his seat and reclined it. He smiled at me. "Come here."

I glanced at him, at the steering wheel, at the shifter, and pictured what he wanted me to do. He wanted me to climb over and sit in his lap, sort of lay on top of him. I bit my lip. That's awfully close.

"Can you give more room?" I asked, gesturing toward the steering wheel. My butt isn't huge, but that was a very small amount of space to fit into. Lewis reached down again and this time his seat slid backward, giving me a little over a foot of space. Much better, because I could just sit on his legs and not his lap. I maneuvered myself over and sat far back on his legs, then leaned forward and kissed him again. His hands found his way to my back, then lower, to my hips. I could feel him slowly try to prod me forward, but I held fast.

After a few minutes he gave up, and simply put one hand on the back of my head and the other on top of one of mine. Mine were on his chest, holding me up.

Several more minutes passed, with no break in the kissing. My arms began to get tired, and I slowly moved the down. I'd been holding myself up, trying not to let my chest touch his, but I was getting tired. And why not? We're fully clothed. His hand stayed on mind all the way down. I ended up with them resting on his stomach. Under his clothes, I could feel the ripple of muscles, and briefly wondered how he looked without a shirt on.

The more I thought about it, the harder I kissed him. I like to indulge in a little fantasy now and then. So distracted I was, kissing him and picturing him with no shirt, probably tan, like a guy on a calendar, that I didn't notice him moving my hand until it was too late. He stopped kissing me and leaned his head back, sighing softly, and I felt movement beneath my hand.

It took me a few moments to realize what I was feeling. Then it dawned on me. Oh. My. God.

I shrieked and jumped back, putting my hands to my mouth. Lewis sat up, wide-eyed. "What? What?"

I quickly jumped away from him, my butt hitting the steering wheel and causing the horn to honk. I looked around the car. I couldn't even see outside, the windows were so fogged. I yanked my jacket from the floor as I rolled into the passenger seat, shrugging into it quickly. "What were you doing?" I asked him, horrified.

"I... you... we were--"

"We were nothing! I don't know what kind of girls you go to school with, but I do not do that!"

Lewis looked incredibly confused. "I'm not trying to sleep with you--"

"Good thing."

"But the way things were going... I mean, I just want you to touch it. I'm not gonna, like, take off my pants or anything." He said with a grin. "I mean, I'll do you, too..."

I gasped, and removed the lid from my still-full soda. Without thinking, I dumped the contents in his lap. "You'll do me, too?" I replied sarcastically as Lewis gasped. "Take me home!"

"Are you fucking crazy?!" He nearly screamed. "Get out of my car!"

My lip trembled. "Wha... what?"

"Get the fuck out!" He shouted again, shoving ice from his lap.

"But my house is miles away!"

"Yeah, well you should have thought about that before you brought me up here, got me all horny, and dumped your fucking soda on me! OUT!"

I jumped out, thinking he would change his mind. He wouldn't really leave me out here in the middle of nowhere, would he?

My question was quickly answered by an engine roaring to life and tires squealing. I watched, openmouthed, as his taillights disappeared down the street. I shoved my hands in my pockets, willing myself not to cry. Why to guys always assume I'm easy? Why do they always try stuff like that? What was wrong with what we were doing?

I pulled out my cell phone. No signal. Great. I began to walk back down the street. Claudia's been doing it with Pete. Mary Anne is thinking about doing it with Logan. Am I a freak for not wanting to have sex? It's not that I don't want to, so much, but I'm just waiting for him, the perfect guy, the one I'll want to remember the rest of my life.

Lewis lives too far away.