Total Drama Bonanza
A Total DramaFanfiction by StoryCrafter12
Disclaimer: Total Drama and all of its characters and settings are property of Teletoon and Fresh TV. Please support the official release.
Warning: The following fanfiction contains dangerous stunts and challenges performed by fictional teenagers. Any attempts to replicate these stunts or challenges may result in one or more of the following: broken bones, lacerations, concussions, contusions, hair loss, teeth loss, brain loss, sanity loss, first-degree burns, second-degree burns, third-degree burns, fourth-degree burns, nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea, coma, death, and halitosis. You have been warned.
Author's Note: In case the summary didn't make things clear, this is an AU fourth season of Total Drama, combining the actual fourth season, Revenge of the Island, with the fifth-and-a-half season, Pahkitew Island. Overall, I enjoyed both seasons, but my biggest issue was the fact that they were both so short! They had so few characters and episodes that they had to rush a lot of very interesting plot lines. I had the thought that they could've had a much longer and better season if they had added a few of Pahkitew Island's characters to RotI, which got my gears turning, and voila! Total Drama Bonanza was born! I hope you have as much fun reading as I did writing.
Okay, enough of my rambling. On with the show!
Day One, Part One: Let the Games Begin
Television personality, zombie/badminton-themed movie star and all-around sadist Chris McLean stood proudly on a certain dock, flashing his pearly whites for the cameras. Behind him stood a now (in)famous campground which looked even more run-down and decrepit than it had been years earlier.
"He-llo, viewing world!" Chris said, throwing his hands up as if to celebrate another season of causing grievous bodily harm to a bunch of teenagers. "Chris McLean here, coming to you from the one and only Dock of Shame, ready to bring you another installment of the world's most twisted reality show, Total Drama!
"Here's the deal: after three seasons of mostly the same contestants, the producers and I decided that it was time to shake things up a bit. Which is why, out of the kindness of our hearts, we've given our original twenty-two contestants and two newcomers a much-needed break from the torture and mayhem. In their place, we're bringing twenty-six brand-spankin' new teenagers back to where it all began, to beautiful Camp Wawanakwa!
"Just like season one, the campers must endure the harshness of nature, Chef Hatchet's revolting camp grub, and the craziest stunts and challenges to date! Winners get prizes, losers get to send someone packing. But in the end, there can be only one winner of the million dollar grand prize! Get ready for another season of blood, sweat and tears here on Total! Drama! Bonanza!"
A small boat pulled up the dock, dropping off a pencil-thin boy wearing an orange vest over a white shirt and a ratty beige toque over a mop of shaggy brown hair.
"And here's our first new camper now!" Chris said as the boy approached, his eyes wide and alert. "Welcome to Total Drama Bonanza, Shawn. What do you think of your home for the next month?"
"Hmm…" Shawn rubbed his chin as he slowly scanned the campground. "Not bad, not bad at all. Nice and isolated, steep cliffs around most of the island, flat space for crops, plenty of natural resources… The beach might be a hazard for the ones that walk along the bottom of the river, but you can solve that with a decent fence." Shawn smiled and nodded. "Overall, an excellent place to survive a zombie apocalypse! Good choice, Chris."
Chris blinked. "Uh… thanks?"
"No problem," Shawn said, stepping out of the way with his suitcase as a new boat pulled up. "I'll start drawing up plans for a perimeter defense system, and we'll have this place zombie-proof in no time!"
"Riiight, you do that," Chris muttered, his smile coming back as a serious-looking woman in a grey sweater and sweatpants leapt onto the dock, arms crossed. "Up next, we have Jo! Looking forward to being here, Jo?"
"Looking forward to winning," Jo clarified, cracking her knuckles. She glanced over at Shawn, who had produced a pen and paper from his bag and was scribbling on it while muttering to himself, and smirked. "And if all of my opponents are stick figures like that guy, I shouldn't have any problems."
"Well then, this next camper might come as a disappointment to you," Chris said as the third boat arrived. "Introducing Brick!"
"Ten-hut!" Said the well-muscled boy with a crew cut as he stepped onto the dock. Jo moved out of the way, giving the new arrival a confused glance as he stood up strait and saluted Chris. "Private Brick reporting for duty, sir!"
"At ease, cadet," Chris said with a chuckle, returning the salute. "And you can say the military stuff for our chef/former drill sergeant."
"Just showing proper respect for my superiors, sir," Brick said as he went to stand with Jo and Shawn, the former bored and the latter interested.
"Armed Forces, huh?" Shawn asked, looking Brick up and down.
Brick chuckled, straightening out his olive green shirt. "Well technically I'm still just a cadet, but I just have a little more-"
"Tell me, did the Army get any of my letters? Are they finally implementing The Zombie Survival Guide as a part of their basic training doctrine?"
Brick's mood took a hard left turn from happy/excited to completely confused. "What with the zombie what now?"
"Eh, just ignore him," Chris said with a dismissive wave of a hand as the next boat pulled up. "I can already tell we'll be doing a lot of that these next few weeks."
Up next was a dark-haired girl wearing a frilly pink dress that looked like it was plucked straight from the pages of a storybook fairy tale. She gracefully jumped onto the dock as her boat cruised by and skipped up to the amused host.
"Hello there, Chris McLean," the girl sang with a voice like silver bells. "I am so excited to be in this game! I hope to have fun, and make lots of friends/and maybe I'll go home with money in the eeeeend!"
The newcomer bowed at the end of her short performance. Chris, Brick and Shawn gave her golf claps while Jo rolled her eyes.
"Nice entrance, Ella," Chris said with a cocked eyebrow. "But you do know that we're not doing the whole 'musical' thing this season, right?"
"Oh, I know," Ella replied with a nod. "But singing is my lifelong passion, and when I feel a song in my heart, I just can't help but let it all out! Oh, I hope it won't be a bother."
"Not at the moment," Chris said with a shrug, "but I wonder how long it'll take before we're all sick of it. I give it three days."
"I give it eleven minutes," Jo deadpanned as Ella joined her fellow campers.
The next boat delivered a tan young man with immaculately combed brown hair, dressed in a blue shirt and khaki pants. The exact shame shade of blue and khaki that Chris was wearing, to be precise. The new arrival took one look at the host and his eyes lit up like a child on Christmas Morning.
"Chris McLean!" The young man said, running up to Chris the second his feet touched the dock and shaking his hand. "Oh man, I can't believe I'm finally meeting you! Dude, I'm such a huge fan and I've seen all of your movies and I own every magazine you've ever appeared in and oh my God I can't believe I'm really shaking your hand!" He quickly dove into his duffle bag and produced a small blue jar and a marker, which he shoved in Chris's face. "Will you sign my hair gel?!"
Chris was momentarily taken aback, but read the label and smiled. "Hey, this is the same brand I use!" He took the marker and gave the jar his John Hancock. "Always have time for young man with such good taste in television hosts and hair care products. Welcome to Total Drama Bonanza, Topher! Hope you'll go far."
Topher stared at his hair gel like he was holding the Holy Grail, while the first four contestants stared at Topher like he had grown a second head that stared speaking backwards German Pig-Latin with a severe stutter.
"Wait…" Jo said slowly, "this Topher guy… actually likes Chris?"
"He did see the first three seasons of this show, didn't he?" Shawn wondered out loud.
"Is he drooling?" Ella asked, noticing the saliva staring to pool around Topher's bottom lip as he walked over to them, eyes still glued to the jar in his hands.
"I think I'm going to like that kid," Chris remarked as the sixth teen stepped onto the Dock of Shame. She was a tall blond girl in a bright pink shirt and dark pink pants. She looked around at all of the cameras and struck a sensual pose instantly.
"Hello there, TV world!" She said with a smile, striking a different pose each time another camera turned to focus on her. "Dakota has arrived, and is ready to take the first step towards fame, glory and becoming a household name!"
"Glad to see some enthusiasm," Chris said with a nod, the cameras turning back towards him as he spoke. "Now, if you'll kindly join the-"
"Hey!" Dakota snapped, grabbing the camera nearest to her and forcibly turning it back in her direction, startling the poor camera man. "Did I say you could look away?! I still have an introductory speech to give here!"
"Ye-eeeeah, no," Chris said bluntly and turned the camera towards him again, further jostling the operator. "We still have twenty more contestants to introduce and we're burning daylight. Just get over there with the others."
Dakota scoffed as she picked up her bags. "Fine. I suppose there will be plenty of time for me to show off my marvelous talents."
"And what would those be, exactly?" Jo asked with a smirk as Dakota joined them. "Applying eye-liner? Deciding what lip-gloss matches your nail polish?"
"Ugh, as if a frumpy meathead like you would know anything about style," Dakota replied, looking away with her nose upturned. Jo growled and cocked her fist, only to feel two sets of hands grab her arm.
"Whoa there soldier," Brick was saying, "let's not have a brawl on the first day now."
"Oh yes, please be nice!" Ella added, frowning. "I just hate violence of any sort!"
"Seriously?" Chris asked with an arched brow, not noticing the approach of the next boat. "Just what show do you think you signed up for, anyways?"
"Uh, that would be Total Drama Bonanza, correct?" A rather nasally voice asked. "Fourth season of the popular Total Drama franchise, with twenty-six teenagers competing for a big cash prize?"
Chris turned to see a very short, very thin black boy standing beside him, dressed in a red sweater and yellow shorts. The boy gave a nervous smile from behind his large glasses, and Chris smiled back.
"Right you are, Cameron," Chris confirmed. He then saw the boy's very large, bulging suitcase and crossed his arms. "Um, you did read the part of your contract that recommended you pack light, didn't you?"
Cameron sighed, patting his suitcase. "Yeah, but one of my mom's conditions in exchange for allowing me on this show was that I don't leave home without my medication. And my first aid kit. And my humidifier. And my emergency hazmat suit…"
"Lots of health problems, huh?" Shawn asked, t'sking and shaking his head as Cameron was added to their group. "Not good odds for surviving a zombie outbreak with those."
The nervousness left Cameron's smile at the sound of this. "Oh, I wouldn't be so sure of that. My physical condition might not be the greatest, but I have read The Zombie Survival Guide cover to cover."
Shawn's eyes lit up. "For real? Bro, I'm designing an anti-zombie defense grid for this island as we speak! Wanna help me figure out where the sentry posts should go?"
"Would I?!"
"Great, the undead nuts are multiplying," Chris muttered as the next boat pulled up. This contestant was a broad-shouldered redheaded boy wearing overalls, a white t-shirt, and a big smile. "Welcome to the island, Rodney! How is it being off the ol' farm?"
"Eh, it's not so bad," the large teen said with a shrug, returning the friendly waves offered by Brick, Ella and Cameron. "This place kinda reminds me of home, and these folks seem friendly enough."
"I just hope you last longer than our last country boy."
"Oh, you mean that Zeke guy?" Rodney frowned and scratched his head. "Whatever happened to him, anyways?"
"Yes, was he okay after being launched out of a volcano during the last season finale?" Ella asked, looking concerned.
"Don't really know," Chris shrugged as Rodney walked over to the others. "He was unconscious when the rescue boats came for us, but vanished from the hospital later that same day and no one's seen him since. Eh, whatever happened, I'm sure he won't bother us again…" Chris trailed off as a particularly strong gust of wind made him shiver. "Man, did anyone else get the chills just now?"
Up next was a girl in a tiny maroon top and blue jeans with a lot of make-up and a very, very obviously fake. She didn't even notice that her boat had stopped, as she was busy looking at herself in a mirror while applying a metric ton of hairspray to her large black pouffe.
"Uh, Anne Maria?" Chris asked, coughing as some of the chemical mist wafted up towards him.
"Hmm?" Anne Maria's eyes widened, then she looked up and smiled. "Oh, sorry about that, Chris," she said in a very thick Joisy accent as she stepped onto the dock with her rolling suitcase in tow. "Had to make sure I looked my best for the cameras, y'know?"
"There, you see?" Dakota said to Jo, gesturing at Anne Maria. "Someone here knows the value of looking good at all times!"
"Got that right, dollface," Anne Maria said. She then noticed Rodney staring at her, a blush on his cheeks and a dopey smile on his face. "Oh hey there country boy. How's tricks?"
"Uh… hu-hu-hi," Rodney said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked away. "Its, uh, n-nice to meet you, Anne. M-my name's-"
"Uh-uh-uh, lemme stop you right there big guy," Anne Maria interrupted him with a finger to his lips, looking serious. "The name is Anne Maria, 'kay? It's like 'A Tribe Called Quest,' or 'A Pimp Named Slickback;' you gotta say the whole thing or it just doesn't work. Capice?"
"Ca-ca-ca-caaa… Uh, yeah," Rodney smiled and nodded, still blushing furiously.
The next boat deposited an average looking boy with lightly-tanned skin and spiky brown hair, dressed in light blue. "Hey there everyone!" he said as he approach Chris and shook his hand. "My name's Mike, and I'm here to have a good time and make some friends."
"That's nice goal you've got there, kid," Chris commented, "but what about that big fat cash prize?"
"Oh, I'm hoping to go home with that too. But making pals along the way would be a nice bonus."
"Uh, is it really smart for us to be all buddy-buddy like this?" Jo interjected with a frown, glancing around at the chattering duos of Dakota and Anne Maria, Cameron and Shawn, Ella and Rodney and Brick and Topher. "I mean, hello! We're here to compete against each other!"
"Yeah, but until the merge, we'll be divided into teams," Mike pointed out as he joined the cluster of teenagers. "Makes sense to be friendly with the guys who could potentially be your teammates."
Jo just rolled her eyes. "Whatever, string-bean. I'm here to win, not make friends."
"Here comes our next camper!" Chris said as the next boat approached, carrying a black-haired girl with soft Native-American features wearing tan and black. When the boat was a fair distance from the dock, the girl narrowed her eyes and took a running start along the deck, leapt onto the railing and launched herself from it, doing a somersault before landing cleanly on the dock, suitcase in hand.
The conversations stopped as the others cheered and clapped. Even Jo looked impressed.
"I may have spoken too soon," she muttered, rubbing her chin. "I like this girl's style."
"Thank you, everyone," the girl said, bowing slightly to her fellow contestants before smiling at the host. "And thank you for accepting my audition, Mr. McLean."
"Thank you for being here, Sky. Nice job on that flip, too; way to stick the landing," Chris said, glancing between her and Ella as he rubbed his chin. "Some of these arrivals make me think I should've made flashy entrances a part of the first challenge. Gotta remember that one for next season."
"Another brilliant idea from the greatest host to ever grace reality TV," Topher said as Sky came over to them. "I swear, there is no end to your genius!"
Chris beamed as the next camper was dropped off. "Oh yeah, definitely liking him. Anyways, welcome to Total Drama Bo… nanza…"
Chris trailed off as he found himself face-to-face with a thin black boy dressed in a long green robe, a ratty-looking green hat, and a fake grey beard dangling down from his chin. The boy had his eyes closed in concentration, chanting as he waved one hand around wildly while the other clutched a thick blue book.
"Espalus speirus…" the boy mumbled, sweat pouring down his brow as the others stared in stunned silence. "Espalus sporonus… Espalus saylus Espalus!"
He gasped deeply, then opened his eyes and smiled at Chris. "Ah, Chris McLean! Forgive my delay, I was just casting an all-stats-buff spell on myself, in preparation for the upcoming competition."
"Oh…kay…" Chris said slowly, taking a step back from the boy. "Good for you, Leonard. Feeling pretty confident then, I take it?"
Leonard gave a confident smirk as he approached the others, who still looked completely confused/disturbed. Confusturbed, if you will. "Oh yeah. Right now I have the strength of thirty men, the speed of a pack of cheetahs, and the toughness of a hunk of solid granite. Allow me to demonstrate." He pointed at Brick. "You there! Knight-in-Training!"
Brick blinked, startled, and looked around wildly before pointing a thumb at his chest. "Uh, you mean me?"
"Yes, you! Come here and punch me in the face! As hard as you can!"
"Punch you in the…" Brick trailed off and looked to his fellow campers, who could only offer bewildered shrugs. "Um, okay then…"
The cadet approached the LARPer, who nodded and pointed at his own grinning mug. Brick gave the camera a defeated shrug and sent his fist into Leonard's face.
Thwack!
Brick stood there like that for a moment, his fist covering Leonard's face completely, one hand still raised to point at himself. When Brick withdrew his fist, blood was leaking from the taller boy's nose as his eyes spun in opposite directions.
"Must not have… cast the spell riiiii…" Leonard murmured, his eyes rolling back as he fell backwards onto the dock. Brick prodded the unconscious boy with the toe of his boot, and the nerd twitched in response.
The rest of the campers and their host just stared.
Overhead, an eagle cried out.
"Well, that happened," Chris said, smiling returning as he eased back into Grinning Host Mode while Brick dragged Leonard over to the group. "On with the show!"
The next camper was a tall girl in a bright red shirt and tan pants, wearing her short red hair in small pig tails, one of which she was nervously adjusting.
"Everyone, this is Zoey," Chris said. "So Zoey, how are you feeling now that you're an official member of the Total Drama family?"
"Really excited, and a little nervous," Zoey said. She looked past the host at the campers who arrived before her, almost all of whom were chatting with one another, and smiled. "But all of the people here seem really nice, so I'm sure I'll have a good time."
"Ah, an optimist." Chris nodded. "Always nice to have contestants with positive attitudes who always see the best in their fellow man."
"Oh, thank you-"
"It's always fun to watch their spirits die when they witness the petty cruelty and betrayal that people are capable of! Hahaha!"
Chris continued laughing as a now worried-looking Zoey joined the others. "And with that, we've reached the halfway point in our introductions. Thirteen campers down, thirteen to go."
The next camper dropped off was a large black boy in a grey jacket and a red ball cap on his head.
"Welcome to Total Drama Bonanza, B," Chris greeted. "Feeling excited to be here?"
B nodded, giving a thumbs up.
"Looking forward to the competition?"
Another nod.
"Hoping to walk away with a million big ones?"
Another nod.
"…"
"…"
"Not much for talking, are you?"
B opened his mouth, then closed it and shook his head.
"… Alright then. Go join the others, if you would."
"B, huh?" Rodney asked as the new contestant came to stand with them. "So, what's the B stand for? Bob?" B shook his head. "Barry?" Another shake of the head. "Brian? Boris? Billy? Bernie? Ben?"
As Rodney continued to guess every 'b' name he could think of, all of which B denied, the next boat arrived, delivering a nervous-looking black-haired boy in a blue sweater vest.
"Our next camper is Dave," Chris said as Dave eyed the campground. "So, what do you think of Camp Wawanakwa?"
"Well, it looks a little…" Dave muttered, staring at the dilapidated buildings with unease written on his face. "Unsafe. When you decided to come back here for season four, did you do any maintenance on this place? At all?"
"Of course," Chris said, and started counting off on his fingers. "We superglued the cracks in the windows, patched up the holes in the roof with plywood, put duct tape on the rotting support beams, and I'm seventy-five-percent sure we got all of that toxic mold out of the communal showers."
"Oh… g-great," Dave said, forcing a smile as he picked up his bags to join the others. "I mean, as long as he's almost sure it's all gone…ehehe…"
"Okay, up next we have Sam, who… uh…"
Chris trailed off as the next boat pulled up, a heavy-set boy with glasses and a mess of curly brown hair standing on the deck. Sam held a Nintendo 3DS, his brow furrowed in concentration as his thumbs shot up and down almost too fast to see, gunshots and screams floating up from the system's small speakers.
"Sam? Dude?" Chris said, snapping his fingers. "Earth to gamer boy, hello! Time to compete for a million dollars!"
The sounds of Sam's game reached the other contestants, and Shawn and Cameron perked up.
"Whoa, is that Resident Evil Revelations 2?" Shawn asked. This finally got Sam's attention, and he smiled as he stepped off the boat.
"Yeah, I'm almost on the final boss," Sam explained as he made his way to the other boys, ignoring the stammering Chris entirely. "I've actually been on a Resident Evil kick lately, and just spent the last two weeks beating all of the console games."
"Dude, I love Resident Evil!" Shawn said, exchanging a fist bump with Sam.
"Me too!" Cameron interjected. "I mean, I haven't actually played them, because my mom won't let me near anything M-rated, but I've watched Let's Plays on YouTube! I think Resident Evil 4 is the best of the bunch."
"Eh, 4 was good, but for traditional zombie slaughtering action, you just can't beat the original trilogy."
"Don't forget the Outbreak games on PS2!" Sam said. "Those were one of the first games to capture the true terror of being in the middle of a zombie apocalypse."
"Ugh!" Chris groaned, throwing his arms up in indignation the boat carrying the seventeenth contestant. "Can we please get someone normal for a change?"
"There is no such thing as 'normal' Chris," the girl with long blond hair and a green sweater said. She sat on the deck of her boat with her legs folded, eyes closed and hands held up at her sides. "Every one of us has quirks that others might consider 'weird,' and it is these differences that make us all unique and our own special way."
"Me and my big mouth," Chris muttered under his breath, then smiled again as the girl got up and joined him on the dock. "Well said, Dawn. Get that off of a fortune cookie?"
"Just one of my personal mantras," Dawn said, baby-blue eyes scanning the other campers. "I must say, you've assembled quite the colorful cast this season. I'm detecting happiness, anticipation, unease, fear, doubt… if you really want drama, it looks like you'll get more than you could hope for."
"Perfect!" Chris clapped his hands together. "I can already smell those delicious ratings!"
Dawn moved to join the group, and her eyes widened at the sight of Leonard. "Oh my, what happened here?"
"We're still kind of trying to figure that out ourselves, to be honest," Dakota remarked, watching as Leonard groaned and slowly sat up.
"Uhh, what happened?" Leonard asked, wiping the dried blood from beneath his nose. "I feel like I took a critical hit from Altharga's War Hammer of Agony."
"Oh, crikey! Up next we've got the lovely Jasmine!" Chris said, adopting a terrible Australian accent to introduce the next camper, a very tall black girl dressed who looked dressed for an outback safari. "Quite the stunning specimen, blokes and shelias. Observe the long legs, no doubt made powerful by her hours of kickboxing with the local kangaroos, and the strong arms that are perfect for throwing lots of shrimp on the Barbie!"
"Ha ha ha, you're hilarious," Jasmine said with an amused smirk. "You done?"
"Yeah, that was all the Australia-isms I had."
"Good, cause your accent really needs work." Jasmine grabbed her suitcases and went to stand with the others. "I'm not even joking. Steve Irwin was probably rolling in his grave."
"Wow, Australia, huh?" Mike asked. "Isn't that the place where all of the animals are trying to kill you?"
"Not all of them," Jasmine protested. "There's… uh… we've got… well…"
While Jasmine rubbed her chin in thought, the next boat pulled up. A scowling redheaded boy in a white wife-beater and dirty blue jeans stepped onto the dock. Topher took note of the new arrival and elbowed Rodney.
"Relative of yours, big guy?" he asked, and the new guy scoffed.
"Me, related to that gorilla?" he asked. "As if."
"Allow me to clarify," Chris said. "This is Scott, everyone. And though he might look it, he's not related to our man Rodney. We've already got one set of relatives competing this season."
"One set?" Ella asked, looking around at the others.
"Oh, they haven't arrived yet," Chris clarified as Scott walked over to the rest. He looked over at the upcoming boat, which was carrying two identical blond girls in red cheerleading outfits, and smiled. "Scratch that, here they come now!"
The boat came to a stop. One of the twins moved to get off, but the other, who had a beauty mark just above the right side of her mouth, grabbed her arm and roughly pulled her back.
"Um, excuse me!" She snarled, stepping up onto the dock. "I get off first, thank you very much!"
"Oh, sorry," the first twin said, glancing down and rubbing her arm as she stepped off the boat.
"Amy, Samey," Chris said to the girls. "Welcome to the lovely Camp Wawanakwa!"
"Um, Chris?" The first twin said, raising a hand. "My name's actually Sammy."
"Yeah, but everyone calls you Samey," Amy said with a cruel smirk. "You know, cause you're the same as me?"
"Yeah, but-"
"Actually, I think your sister has a point," Chris said, jerking his thumb towards the chattering trio of Sam, Shawn and Cameron. "We've already got a guy named Sam, and we don't want to get confused…" Chris beamed and put a hand on Samey's shoulder. "So congratulations! For the rest of the game, you're Samey!"
"Well can't you just call me Samantha or something?"
"Nope! Samey it is!"
"But I…" Amy pushed her way past Samey to join the others, and she sighed and followed her sister. "Okay then."
"What's up, Camp Wawanakwa?!" The next camper shouted as his boat pulled up. He was a broad shouldered black boy wearing Winnipeg Blue Bombers jersey. "Lightning is in the house, and ready to dominate this game!"
"Well, someone's feeling confident," Chris said, giving Lightning a fist bump. "Are you in it to win it?"
"You even gotta ask? Lightning's got this contest in the bag!" He looked over at Amy and Samey and grinned. "And you got me cheerleaders? Chris, you shouldn't have!"
"Uh, no," Jo pointed out, arms crossed. "They're your competition, genius!"
"Oh." Lightning's smile fell, but quickly came back. "That's cool, when I make to the finale, then they can cheer for me!"
"Well that's going to be kind of hard," Amy said, her hands on her hips, "since I'll be going to the finale too." She elbowed her sister in the back. "You can have Samey cheer for you though, if you don't mind a second-stringer."
"One of you might make it to the final two," Jo said, looking smug. "But neither of you stand a chance against me!"
"Don't make me laugh," Anne Maria said with a smirk. "The only one who's winning that cash is moi!"
"Wrong!" a new voice screamed, making everyone jump. Twenty-three heads turned to see a short boy with purple hair and a grey jumpsuit glaring at them as his boat sped away. "All of you worthless peons will be crushed beneath the evil heel of Max! And after I conquer your pathetic reality show, the world will follow!" The boy threw back his head and cackled. "Mwahahahahaha – ack!"
The boy stopped, coughing and pounding his chest with a fist. "Gah! Chocking on my own spit!"
"Looks like we've got a lot of competitive spirit," Chris said, rubbing his hands together as Lightning and a still-hacking Max joined the others. "Oh man, this season is going to be juicy!"
The next boat came, delivering a tall girl wearing a yellow sweater, glasses, and her red-hair in a bun.
"Welcome to the show, Scarlet," Chris said, shaking the new arrival's hand.
"Salutations, Chris," Scarlet said, taking a moment to adjust her glasses. "I look forward to an engaging four weeks of healthy and friendly competition."
"Competition, yes," Chris said, looking back at the ever-growing group of teenagers. Jo, Anne Maria, Lightning, Amy and Max were all still glaring at one another. "Friendly? That might be stretching things a bit."
"It is of no consequence," Scarlet said with a shrug. "Let their hyper-competitive nature be their downfall while those of us willing to compromise and use teamwork prosper."
The next to arrive was a large black man with long dreadlocks and a thick beard. As his boat pulled away, he made the sound of a sputtering engine.
"Beardo," Chris greeted. "Mr. Human Soundboard himself. Think your talents will get you far in this game?"
Beardo smirked and nodded, making the well-known cha-ching sound.
"Good man," Chris nodded as Beardo joined the others just as the twenty-sixth and final boat pulled up. "And last but certainly not least, give it up for the incomparable Sugar!"
"Hello, everybody!" a southern-accented voice said as a heavy-set girl in a too-small pink shirt hopped onto the dock, making it shake. Sugar gave her blond hair a toss as she strutted along the dock, the boards creaking beneath her feet. "Take a good look at the winner of Total Drama's fourth season! Better just give me the money now and save us all the trouble."
"Sorry Sugar, but we wouldn't have much of a show if we did that." Chris produced a camera from his pocket and hopped onto the last boat, while interns scattered to move everyone's luggage to shore. "Okay, before we get everyone divided into teams and settled in, we've gotta get a group show for the promos! Gather round if you please, everyone."
The twenty-six teenagers gathered in the center of the dock, the worm-eaten wood groaning as they did. Scarlet tapped a board with her foot, and frowned as a piece broke off. "Um, Chris?" She said. "I have some concerns about the structural integrity of this dock."
Chris rolled his eyes. "You too? I'll tell you what I told Dave: its fine! I guarantee that there will be no accidents with the Dock of Shame. Now, everyone smile and say 'Wawanakwa!'"
"Wawanakw – AUGH!"
The teenagers all screamed as the beams supporting the dock snapped, dumping all of them into the lake. Chris cackled as the resulting wave rocked his boat.
"Oh man, that never gets old!" He said, watching the campers flounder and thrash in the water.
"What the hell, Chris?!" Jo demanded, spitting out a mouthful of lake water. "You said there wouldn't be any accidents!"
"And I meant it! We purposely designed the dock to collapse like that."
"Haha, good one Chris!" Topher called, crying out as a struggling Dakota splashed him. "Hey, watch the hair!"
"Help!" Cameron cried out, desperately trying to stay above water. "I can't swim!"
"I'll save you, little girl," Lightning said heroically as he hefted Cameron onto his shoulders, ignoring the protesting reply of; "I'm a boy!"
"Keep it out of the water, keep it out of the water!" Sam said, holding his 3DS overhead while awkwardly swimming to shore with one arm, while Beardo trailed behind him making the drowning music from Sonic the Hedgehog.
"Ah, this brings back memories," Chris said with a wistful smile. "Okay everyone! After you get dried off, meet me at the campfire pit so we can divide you into teams and get this party started!"
End of Day One, Part One
And with that, Chapter One comes to a close. Drop a review and let me know what you think! Constructive criticism is always appreciated and encouraged.
See you next time!
StoryCrafter12