Inu-Yasha had gone off to Kikyo again, even though he knew how much it hurt her, and what hurt the most was that he went right after they had a fight. She sighed and grabbed her journal that she thought would not have anymore of her heartache ever sense that day, but apparently she was wrong. Sighing she walked off away from the campsite to were it all started, the old tree that protected and was there for her in both times, the Goshiniboku.
When she had finally reached the tree she just collapsed at its trunk letting the tears that she had hidden from everyone else fall. "Why Yasha?" she mumbled to herself knowing no one was around to hear her or to comfort her, "why do you make me cry and not be there to make me smile again? Why do you always run off to her? You told me you loved me, were you lying? What happened?"
She just sat there whispering and mumbling all the questions that were hiding in her heart that she was too afraid to hear the answer too. That she was afraid to ask, for the fear that the answer to them could kill her in a way no demon could ever think of doing so.
She soon curled up in a ball with tears still falling down her face with her eyes closed tightly with her journal close to her chest.
Not soon after she had fallen asleep Inu-Yasha walked up in front of her trying to think and not really paying attention to where he was or what was going on around him. He had gone to see Kikyo earlier and knew that Kagome was going to be upset especially sense they had just fought, but he had to go and see her to tell her good bye, he probably should have waited until next time Kikyo called for him, but he wanted all this behind him so he could be with Kagome and not have to worry about her getting hurt by Kikyo.
He paused when he heard someone sniffle as if they were trying to stop crying, he looked down and saw none other than Kagome with her face covered in her tears. He sighed and he knew that he was going have hell to pay when she woke up. Figuring it would be best if he was there and that she did not have to go looking for him, he sat down by her and moved her head so she was resting on his lap.
"Shit," he mumbled, "how am I going to explain this one to her before she tries to sit me all the way to hell?" He sighed and looked at her lovingly, 'she is so peaceful and cute when she is sleeping' he thought letting his guard down sense there was no one around to see him. It was then he noticed her journal that he was told many a times that he was not aloud to touch or read. 'Hell,' he thought, 'she is already going to kill me, I doubt looking at her journal will make much of a difference.'
With that thought, he reached for her journal and carefully grabbed it and took it out and flipped to the last page of her writing, wondering what had been on her mind recently.
'I guarded my heart from all who tried to steal it, everyone who tried failed. I swore I never would let anyone steal my heart or hurt it like it has been in the past, yet you slipped past my wall, over the barbed wire and past the lock to the chest that held my heart, now you wear it around your neck as a prize, a token of a won battle. You are the only one to get past my walls and live to tell the tale. And now you are the keeper of my heart now. It never was supposed to happen, I never believed in it, but I fell in love. But I beg of you please do not break my heart like it has been in the past I don't think I could live if it was broken again.'
He looked at it for a second and re-read it again making sure he was reading it right. He smiled realizing that in fact that he did not miss read it and that in fact that she had wrote it, and now all he had to do was to make sure that she was talking about him in it even though he was sure that she was but because of recently and the fight he could not be sure.
He soon felt Kagome began to move as she was waking up. She looked up at him without really registering what was happening and for a spilt second he thought he was off the hook. Then, after a second she shoot up and glared at him and practically hissed, "What are you doing here?"
"Kagome," he whispered in a soft voice.
"Don't you 'Kagome' me you bastard!" She growled at him. She was past crying and she just wanted to make him feel the way she had felt because of him. "You tell me you love me, we fight, and then you run off to that clay pot of a bitch! And you have the nerve to come to me and talk sweetly like nothing has happened at all!"
"Kagome" he tried again.
"No, whatever it is you are trying to say just save it. I don't want to hear it!" She barked out.
"Kagome," he said again still sweetly but a little annoyed and frustrated from her not letting him talk. She opened her mouth to yell at him again but he quickly kissed her to make her shut up. "Let me finish before you go and bite my head off." He stated and paused for a second to see if she would stay quite so he could continue. Seeing that she had stayed quite, he continued on what he was trying to say in the first part. "I am sorry, I ran to Kikyo at the worst time." He stated, and continued before she could interrupt him again, "I had to go and talk to her because I had to tell her goodbye and warn her that if she hurt you or threatened to hurt you in any way, that I would kill her."
She looked at him for a second, with confusion in her eyes, "… that is why you went to her?" she asked softly.
He smiled at her, "Yes love that is why I went to her."
Kagome smiled and then realized something, that she no longer had her journal. She quickly scanned the area with her eyes searching for it only to find it in Inu-Yasha's lap turned to the page that she had written the day that they had finally had told each other how they had truly felt.
"You… did you read that?" she asked in a quite voice laced with panic pointing to her journal.
"Yeah," he said simply. "So… is it about me?" he asked quietly.
She looked at him shocked for a second, "yeah…" she whispered, "I wrote it the day we told each other I love you for the first time, actually I wrote it right before you came to me that day." She said smiling slightly remembering that day.
He looked over towards her, "what do you mean when you said…" he looked down and found it in the journal, "'but I beg of you please do not break my heart like it has been in the past I don't think I could live if it was broken again' if you never fell in love with anyone else?" he asked curiously.
She looked at him and sighed, "You see… have you ever noticed how you never met my dad and that he is never around?" she asked and he just simply nodded, he had been wondering about that for different reasons though, "Well when I was younger my dad died from a broken heart after my mom left him. They were fighting and all and she had told him that she didn't love him any more. I was staying with my dad at the time, because he was closer to the school, and they did not want to disrupt my life or anything like that. And well he told me basically not to give away my heart or fall in love because death by a broken heart is the worse way to die. My mom came back the day after that with Grandpa but I was still sad for I had loved them both. So I ended up with a broken heart and a wall around it to keep it safe from being hurt again." She smiled, "But you are the only one to get around all the defenses."
He smiled sadly and pulled her into a hug, "I won't ever hurt you I promise," he said and sealed the promise with a kiss.
What do you think? Review please!! 3 Dose the poem make more sense now? If not send me a message and I can explain it a little better.