A/N: I love love Julian Baker (he's my new Lucas if you will), and OTH won't be the same without him or B/J, so I came up with this idea it'll probably be five parts. Just a warning, the timeline may be a bit spoilerish.
For you English Lit experts, the original quote in the summary is "Without him life was unbearable, with him life was a routine."
Summary: Without her life was unbearable, with her life was a routine. – To Kill a Mockingbird.
Chapter One: Shadow
March 30th, 2009 7:50
When Julian Baker had boarded his plane from L.A to Tree Hill two months ago, he was filled with excitement and lust. While trying to a make a movie, he had come back to get Peyton Sawyer back. Now, on his way home he found himself filled with dullness and love.
"This place changed me, Brooke changed me." Julian recalls telling Peyton that exact line. It's the truth. Brooke Davis made him want more than just a successful Hollywood career, he wanted a family.
"Would you like a refill on your drink?" Julian looked at the wine glass, it was empty now and he had only been in the air for twenty minutes.
"Please." He watched the sexy attendant walk to the back of first class and grab the bottle.
"Just charge it to my seat." He whispers, as she pours. The women nods and sends him a grin afterwards.
Her grin.
Julian closed his eyes and thought he could feel her smile, up against his cheek. If he tried really hard, he could smell her perfume.
Maybe if he had tried harder, she would have been sitting next to him.
Julian turns to his right and looks at the two empty. The leather is in perfect shape, the space around it isn't dirty and there isn't any sarcastic remarks coming from the teenaged girl who would have been in the window seat.
Julian took another sip of his wine and makes it a long one. For the first time he notices the people sitting across from him. One of them, a young girl maybe ten, reminds him of someone.
The young girl's hair is short, and even though it's blonde it's the same type of hair Brooke had. She was wearing a large Clothes over Bros t-shirt that Julian assumed was her mothers. She had this sparkle to her smile as she drew, Julian imagined a young Brooke with that kind of sparkle.
"Mommy, look! One day I'm going to be the new Brooke Davis." Julian looked at the girl and smiled.
No one could ever compare to Brooke Davis.
March 30th, 2009 11:50
When Julian walked into his bedroom, after the long flight, he didn't expect it to bed so hard. The bed was perfectly made, roses were perfectly placed on the bed. To top it off, there were white candles all around the room.
Just like Julian had asked.
Julian went over to the bed and began to throw the roses off the bed. Next, he took each candle and slammed it into the hardwood floor. He felt peace watching the candles break into pieces, as if each candle symbolized the special moments he had shared with Brooke.
Julian didn't know why but that's when he felt the tears fall. He plopped himself on the bed and wiped them away.
"I'm no Lucas Scott." Julian told himself. But then again, if I had been maybe she wouldn't have left me.
Julian didn't know what to do, so he pushed the covers away and felt his teary eyes droop.
March 31st, 2009 10:07
When Julian heard all the commotion outside of his house, he knew it was time to get up. He turned to his side and took a deep breath in.
The side was empty.
Julian stared at the empty space and then touched the pillow.
"I love you Brooke."
The hardest part wasn't being told no; it wasn't going on a plane only to think and drink away the relationship; it wasn't the roses or candles.
The hardest part was waking up and thinking that she was there, but then it's only her shadow.