He walks down the empty sidewalk, dragging his feet, kicking at a bottle-top as it bounces along the concrete. The streetlights cut illuminated circles of light that he passes in and out of, like some sort of apparition. He stumbles, but catches himself, never slowing down. He chases the empty pavements, even if they lead nowhere.
Her face invades his mind, decidedly so. Its not as if she hasn't been the only thing he's been thinking about for who knows how long. All he knows is that one day she was just another fan, another girl, another friend to be made. Then all of a sudden she was everywhere. At their shows. On their tour bus. Eating out with them, hanging out with them, making out with (one of) them.
Not him though. He should be so lucky. No, he's just a big goof to her. Someone to jam with. Someone to prank Nate with. Someone to awkwardly - jealously - look away when Shane runs fingers though her hair, or caresses her elbow fondly.
It's the little things that kill him the most.
Logic, reason, common sense tells him it's lust. He's going after what he can't have.
Wrong.
His heart tells him that it is definitely, absolutely, indubitably love that he feels for her.
Mitchie.
He exhales the name softly, the hot air curling around his cool lips, making them sting. Even when she's not even there, she causes him pain. But she doesn't know. She can never know.
But he can't do it anymore. He can't see her, hear her, smell her everyday and not say something. But he wouldn't tell her outright. He could never risk that. He'd just write a song, telling the world how much she really means to him. But he could never say enough. And it wouldn't be enough. Because he wasn't saying it to her directly.
That's what he needs to do. Because if he loves her, really loves her, he has to let her know.
But he knows deep down she doesn't want to, because she doesn't feel the same. Even on the one in a million, no, billion chance that she does, she's not going to up and dump her boyfriend for him. He would hate to put her in that position as well. Shane is his friend. He doesn't want to hurt anyone. It's just better for everyone if he suffers in silence.
It feels so wrong and so right, and he doesn't feel the need to look any further that that. He doesn't like going deep inside himself, analysing his feelings and behaviours, doing the whole 'introspective' deal. All that just brings up very complex emotions that he can really do without. Straight and simple, that's what he can relate to. That's all he really needs.
He finds himself humming a random melody of notes. They blend together seamlessly, and although they're not always in the right key, they sound perfect to him. It reminds him of her. This is her song. He only breaks his tune abruptly when his sneaker dips into a crack in the street, unsteadying him, but not stopping him. He chases the empty pavements, even if they lead nowhere.
He knew his place. Friend? Definitely. Lover? Definitely not.
But should he just leave it at that? Maybe he should just give up, accept the fact of her romantic indifference and move onto someone who would take the time to love him back.
Deep down he knows that she is the only one he wants to do that. It would be wasted on anyone else.
"Jason?"
He loves it when he says his name. He allows himself a split second of bliss before looking up in surprise. There she is, standing before him with her hands on her hips and her facial expression awash with relief. His walk across the cold, dark paths of the city have lead him full circle. He should have realised that someone would have noticed him missing in the middle of the night. Fortunately for him, it just so happened to be her.
She dashes towards him and flings her arms around his neck, anxiously scolding him for up and leaving with no warning and scaring the crap out of everyone. He could have been hurt. He could have been killed. Don't ever scare her like that again, you hear her?
He just smiles and wrapped his broad arms around he petite frame, breathing her in for the short instance he barely gets to experience, before pulling back and looking deep into her eyes, building himself for the inescapable. His thumbs trace circles on her hips, and his heart drops when he feel her hands sliding down his back, leaving a tingling sensation in their wake.
Could this finally be it?
He smiles and ruffles her hair teasingly, before she turns and skips away, back towards their equally relieved friends. Shrugging innocently, he joins them as they pat him on the back, laugh, and reproach him. In the midst of the commotion, he catches her eye again, and gives her sly wink. She raises her eyebrows in challenge, like she's aware he knows something she doesn't.
He didn't tell her, but he hasn't given up. He just keeps on chasing empty pavements, even if they lead nowhere.
Based off my favourite song atm; Chasing Pavements by Adele. Love it.
I felt like writing a quick Jason/Mitchie, just because I don't think anyone's done it before, and I like to be a trendsetter.
Review and tells us what you thinks of Jitchie?