A reviewer has asked me (somewhat rudely, I'd appreciate it if everyone who is kind enough to review could also be kind enough to keep it polite and constructive) to add a warning about "Ron-bashing". I don't intend to "bash" any characters except the ones Hermione doesn't like and I won't be putting up any warnings apart from the obvious (there will be mentions of sex and some swearing)- if you don't like the way I write then don't read it.

This is a diary written from Hermione's point of view during the time that she is married to Ron, and any wife gets fed up with her husband occasionally.

Saturday 19th August 2017

13.37

HORRIBLE argument with Ron today. Hugo was being sick all morning so I told Ron he'd have to make his own breakfast. He turned into the teenager I first knew him as. He started sulking and grumbling under his breath so I could only catch half of what he said, but it all sounded nasty. I told him I was his wife, not his mother, and it wasn't too much to ask him to feed himself every now and then. He had the nerve to tell me I'M the child- because I still keep a diary! He shouldn't be looking at them anyway! We may be married but I'm still entitled to some privacy.

Hugo's stomach seems to have settled down now, which is a blessing at least. Hopefully Rose won't get it too, or Ron and I will most probably go through all this again and another row will break out.

Mind you, Rose would probably get a bit annoyed if I looked after her as much as I have Hugo. She's getting to that sort of age now. Now it's nearly time for her to go to Hogwarts, she thinks she's ever so grown-up. I don't know what I'll do with only one child in the house (well, TWO I suppose! The way Ron's acting lately!). It's a cliché but it really does seem like only yesterday that she was in nappies.

Oh, poor Hugo... I can hear him crying again.

15.32

My sweet little boy! He told me he was really sorry for making me take time out of my day to look after him. He's such a gentle, kindly thing. I think it's Harry's influence; it can't be much to do with Ron.

Ron's just told me something surprising- apparently Draco Malfoy has a little boy who will be starting Hogwarts the same time as Rose. The news made us forget our argument entirely. I wonder if he's like his father? Things between ourselves and Draco were so different after the war. I can't say any of us will ever be friends with him - but perhaps Rose can build a bridge. I'll have to make sure she doesn't listen to anything Ron says about him.

How funny that Rose, Albus AND Draco Malfoy's son will all be starting at the same time!

19.26

It's not that funny really. I write some rubbish in this diary sometimes.

Sunday 20th August 2017

18.54

Merlin, what a day!

Diagon Alley was absolutely HEAVING with people buying everything last minute. I TOLD Ron we should have taken Rose sooner. We've had since the start of July. And there seems to be so many more textbooks than we ever had to get- it's ended up ever so expensive.

I bet Draco Malfoy doesn't have to worry about the cost of school supplies.

23.21

Ron is snoring with his back to me. We haven't been married in THAT sense of the word for a couple of weeks now. I think it's just a dry spell.

Monday 21st August 2017

08.14

Excuse my scruffy writing. I've had to get the Knight Bus to work today because I keep coming over all funny when I Apparate. Ginny was quite adamant that I shouldn't do it for a while, so I'm stuck on this horrible bus that makes me feel even more ill.

I wanted to book this whole week off so I could give Molly a rest from babysitting, and I also thought it would be nice to spend some time with Hugo while he's recovering. They wouldn't let me, though. They said I need to give them more notice. Ron says it's because they can't cope without me, which was quite nice of him really.

I have to take a break from writing now because it's making me feel worse, and there's an old woman across from me who looks like she might vomit over the pages at any moment.

19.02

Just got home- that woman vomited all over my clothes! I'm NEVER getting the Knight Bus to work again. I don't care how bad Apparition feels at the moment. I Vanished the sick out of my clothes but I felt like I smelt awful all day, so I'm just going to jump in the bath before Ron gets home. Molly says she'll stay with Hugo for a bit.

Shouted hello to Rose but I don't think she can hear me over the music. She's into this new band where all the members look about 13. I was never very good at music when I was young myself, but even I know this is rubbish.

Tuesday 22nd August 2017

08.45

Me and Rose have BOTH got Hugo's virus! I've Floo'd work to tell them and I don't think they believed me, seeing as I wanted this week off anyway. That is, they didn't believe me until I projectile-vomited into the fireplace and splattered them both. I felt absolutely disgusting and vile but Ron wet himself laughing.

Nice to know you find your wife's misery amusing, Ronald.

15.43

I went back to bed after that last diary entry and guess what- I only just woke up! I feel a bit better vomit-wise but I've got a thumping headache now from sleeping for so long.

Molly's still here, bless her. She came over this morning when Ron told her I was ill and she's been looking after Rose and Hugo all day. Rose is a bit annoyed I think, because she thinks she's about 18. But you can see the smile she tries to hide when Grandma strokes her hair and makes her soup.

I swear that woman must put potions in her food. It makes everyone feel better.

Wednesday 23rd August 2017

11.23

Still feeling rough so stayed at home again today. I'll have to go in tomorrow or they'll think I made myself sick on purpose or something. God I hate that place. I never wanted to go into Law Enforcement- I wish I'd done something with S.P.E.W. Ron and Harry may find it hilarious but I don't care what they say- it just isn't right making slaves out of those poor creatures.

Rose is a bit better I think. Ron is treating us both as if we have the plague. He won't come near either of us.

I told Molly to go home as Rose isn't as bad. She offered to stay and do dinner but I just feel awful making her look after us all the time. She's had to bring up 7 kids- she deserves a rest now they're all grown-up.

Well, not all of them. Ron still acts like a child.

11.34

I feel wicked now. They're not all grown-up. I just remembered about Fred. I can't believe I actually forgot for a moment.

Eurgh, I'm just going to go to sleep again I think. Feel absolutely horrendous and now guilty as well.

Thursday 24th August 2017

13.21

Lunch break at work- been swallowing my own sick before it can come out all day. Disgusting but better than vomiting in people's faces. Pansy and Daphne still haven't forgiven me for the Floo incident.

I still can't believe I actually ended up working with Pansy Parkinson. Daphne is all right for a Slytherin but I dreamed up about twenty different ways of killing Pansy at school.

13.31

"All right for a Slytherin". I sound like Ron. Daphne is all right. Her personality has nothing to do with being a Slytherin.

13.49

Except the ambitious part. That's kind of the point of Slytherin as a House. And she's definitely ambitious- we're the same age, she did bugger all in the war, and somehow she's ended up my boss in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement.

Friday 25th August 2017

12.07

Oh, I can't wait until this week's over and I can feel sorry for myself all weekend. I'm sure it's Apparating back and forth every day that's keeping me ill. Rose's bug has pretty much gone now.

Can't even manage my lunch today. Might just have a nap on the sofa until I have to go back to bloody Pansy. She's loving the fact that my work isn't up to its normal standard. Luckily Daphne knows it's because I'm not feeling well. She's still not very sympathetic, though.

19.03

Oh my god- Daphne came in during my lunch and started talking to me about Rose starting Hogwarts. She said she's got a nephew starting this year too- and guess who it is! Scorpius Malfoy, Draco's son!

Apparently her little sister Astoria is Draco's wife. I don't remember her from school, but then she's two years younger so I don't suppose our paths would really have crossed.

I told her I hope Scorpius (strange name) and Rose will be friends. She just snorted.

Going out with Ginny on Sunday. Hopefully I'll feel more like myself by then.

Saturday 26th August 2017

10.30

Feel better already after a good lie-in and no need to Apparate anywhere. Just realised how soon it is that Rose leaves us though and that made me feel down again. It's less than a week before she goes!

I know she'll love it there, though; we all did. She's never been one to get homesick or anything like that. I'm a bit worried about Albus, though. He seemed really nervous that day we all went to Diagon Alley. I asked him if he was looking forward to going and he looked like he might burst into tears.

I'll ask Ginny tomorrow if there's anything he's said. If he's worried about the work being too hard he can always write to me and I'll do my best to tutor him by owl.

15.42

I feel healthy enough to cook a proper meal tonight, so I've just prepared the meat. Rose is complaining because it's supposed to be a Sunday roast, but if me and Ginny are going out then I won't have the time.

I'm not sure where we're going. I hope she's not expecting me to get dressed up. I don't think I can fit into any of my nice clothes since Hugo was born.

19.18

Nipped round to Ginny and Harry's to ask her what I should wear tomorrow. She wasn't in, though. Harry said she'd taken the kids out for a McDonalds. Ever since she discovered Muggle fast food she's turned into a bit of a fatty. Not physically, of course- Ginny will always be athletic and skinny. But she eats as if a fatty is just waiting to burst out of her.

I asked him- a bit desperately- if he knew what she was planning, and whether I should dress up. He told me I look lovely whatever I wear. It was sweet of him but I know it isn't true.

My hair is full of split ends and my face is so much pudgier than it was before I had children. Why do some women- like Ginny- lose the weight so quickly, and others- like me- just keep piling it on?

What really takes the pumpkin cake is that I'm the one who's running around at work all day and should be burning off the fat. Ginny gave up her career to look after the kids. Surely she should be the one who looks like a dowdy housewife, not me!

I feel a bit mean now. That sounded like I think there's something wrong with being a housewife. There's not, of course. It's Ginny's choice.

19.43

It's an odd choice, though. If I were Ginny I'd feel like I was turning into my mum.

20.01

Feel even meaner now.

Sunday 27th August 2017

11.13

Managed to convince myself that Ginny will know all the horrible things I thought about her last night and nearly decided I wasn't going. Luckily I realised I was being silly and haven't cancelled on her. I can't say I really want to go, though. I just know she'll drag me out to some bar or somewhere where we have to dance, and all the men will look at her and none of them will look at me.

Ron has got his driving test tomorrow. He's never going to pass, but I've made him a huge "Good Luck" card with the kids anyway. You never know- stranger things have happened. Not many, but still...

16.45

Ginny's coming over at 5.30 and we're going out at 6 and I still have no idea what to wear. My hair is taking forever to dry and I can't remember how to put on eyeliner without smudging it all over my face. Somehow I've managed to make myself look like an 80s drag queen even without my massive frizzy hair.

Think I might tell her I can't come.

01.03

ABSOLUTELY BRILL NIGHT. GINNY MAD. ALL THE BEST SONGS FROM SCHOOL. THINK I SAW SOMEONE FAMOUS. AWESOME!