I'm going to be late

I'm gonna be late

Fuck, I'm gonna be late.

I ran past a group of stoners who each cursed under their breaths as I pushed my way through them. The 100 pound books in my hands were starting to slip and I knew that if they followed that path I'd be a source of entertainment to 60 students for five minutes. Luckily I reached the door without having to cry about my books falling until class ended. I was usually very over dramatic. I'd change my major to drama if I didn't sweat buckets every time I stood on a stage.

As I walked into class I already knew what was coming. Students already began staring at me with a quiet grin on each and every one of their faces. I looked over at the professor who seemed to be reading something out of a very interesting book. He looked at me and then squinted almost as if I really wasn't there which I was used to. Not a lot of people actually noticed me. I pushed my glasses back and tried to ready myself for what was about to come.

"Spencer, correct?"

I nodded in astonishment and pushed my glasses back once again.

"Take a seat." He gestured to the class and then continued reading.

As I walked towards the back everyone just stared at me in disbelief. Professor Blent never missed an opportunity to scorch a student with his words of wisdom on how lateness was an early symptom in the severe disease that is failure.

I listened to his lecture intently. The ounce of pity he handed me this fine morning still circling around my brain as though I had nothing else to think about. I really didn't have anything else to think about which is sad, but true well except for the stranger. I've always kept to myself even in high school and I guess it just followed me here.

As his discussion began to center around Immanuel Kant and his theories, my mind decided to stop belonging to me. I looked around the class and noticed one sad couple passing a note to each other. Now I know I may be ostracized from society, but I do know that text messaging exists and using notes was over about ten years ago. After he read what she had written back to him, his hands fell in his head and he looked as though a swarm of tears were about to invade his eyes. She only looked down at her lap and then back at him with a red puffy face.

Someone's pregnant.

As soon as class ended students began filling up the sitting area outside of the building. Some faces were happy, some weren't. Everyone just looked the same to me happy mad or sad in the end they were all just the same except for her. I sat by the tree as I usually did and stared right at her as I was hidden in the shade. Nature was usually on my side. Her brown curls covered her angelic features as she pulled a cigarette to her lips and light it up with ease. Camel Golds. That's what she smoked. I wondered why she enjoyed those and then thought about how she liked things smooth. Not just the toxic smoke running through her lungs, but her life as well. She seemed at peace as she sucked on her death. I looked up the definition for stalker and was pleased when I found out I wasn't anything like what a stalker is. I just watched her from afar and knew what type of cigarettes she smoked. I didn't know where she lived, who her friends were, or even her name.

"Hey Spence." A tall figure stood before me blocking my view of the beautiful leather jacket wearing cigarette smoking stanger. It seems so 1950s really. I wonder if she has a motorcycle and slicks back her hair with the occasional thumbs up that always wins the ladies, or boys over.

"Spencer?"

Right this is Aiden. Possibly the hottest human being that ever acknowledged my existence. I helped him with a test once randomly and ever since then we've sort of just hit it off.

"Hey sorry. How was your day?"

He took a seat next to me and I proceeded to stare at the beautiful girl taking in the last couple of drags on her cigarette. As soon as she finished it she pulled out another one. That was very unlike her. She liked her life smooth and this just totally messed it up. Something has to be wrong.

"It was alright. I'm glad it's Friday though. How about you?" He noticed who my eyes were fixated on and then sighed.

"Eh same old same old. Blent didn't bitch at me for being late though which was odd." I decided to stop my gawking and turn to the messy haired boy.

"Weird. So I'm playing drums with Hunters band tonight and I was hoping you'd come since you never leave that shitty dorm room even during fire drills."

I laughed and then thought about what the stranger did today. How she changed up her entire routine with just that one cigarette.

"I'll go."

"What!?"

In my four months of knowing Aiden I'd never seen him on weekends or even outside of this area or my dorm room. I know it's sad, but I like it that way. Today was different though. Stranger said it with that stick dying out in her fingers.

"Yeah I don't really have any tests to study for this weekend so why not?"

He hugged me and then gave me that orbit lady smile of his. "Alright I'll pick you up at 8. You better not bail!" He ruffled my hair and left me alone. My eyes looking back over at her and that emotionless face.

Oh no.

Oh god no.

Nature had finally decided to throw me out and now eyes were staring right back at me as neither the tree nor the shade hid my blue eyes. Her eyes turned curious and mine were stuck like glue. I couldn't look away even if I wanted to because I had lost complete control over anything that was happening right this moment. Then she decided I was nothing more than an on looker. Someone with nothing better to do than stare at a grungy looking boot wearing girl. Ugh she probably thought I was in some bible club or something. I looked down at my clothes and then frowned. When I looked back up she was gone along with my heart which she had taken since day one. I collected my things and walked back to my room in both misery and sheer happiness. I didn't know if I should be sad that she finally saw me or happy that she finally saw me.

A quick nap would help my mind break away from its internal battle over this stranger.

At least now I had a new hottest person to ever acknowledge my existence. Unless she didn't notice I was there and was admiring the tree. Hmm back to my nap.