I'm well aware that this kind of story isn't everyone's cup of tea. I won't hold it against you if you skip this one. ;-)

Special thanks to my awesome beta reader mearcats. She is an absolute gem, and I'm so grateful for having her as an editor.

TRIGGER WARNING: I mention some sensitive topics in this story (prostitution, child abuse, attempted rape), and overall this story deals with some darker themes. It's also a ménage à trois story – so expect M/M/F and M/M, plus some kinky action. You've been warned.

Chapter 1

Killian

It had been ten years. A lifetime ago. The boy he'd been ten years ago was gone. There wasn't even a shred of him left.

But he was still here. Walking down memory lane by coming back for his high school reunion. Though there was only one reason why he was here. Well, two reasons if he was honest with himself. And he always was.

He'd stopped lying to himself the moment his hand had hit the ground when Gold hacked it off his arm in his manic rage. The doctors had tried everything, but in the end they had to give up. His hand had been lost, and even five years later he woke up sometimes to feel it twitch. But he had one of the best prosthetics money could buy; it couldn't truly replace the real thing, but it was very good, and he'd learned to live with it.

That night all those years ago had changed his life - the loss of his hand had been a kind of wake-up call. All his dreams about becoming rich by being one of the best defense lawyers of the country had shattered in the few weeks that followed. He'd been drunk to the gills, ignoring the calls of his brother and friends, shutting himself away from the world until Regina Mills had stopped by his apartment, taking him completely by surprise. With her no-nonsense attitude, she'd straightened him out, told him that he'd always been too soft for the job anyway. If his mind hadn't been swimming in a pool of cheap rum he might have been offended, but since the alcohol had slowed down his brain, he'd listened to her without complaining, realizing despite his addled mind that she was giving him a once in a lifetime opportunity. And he'd taken it.

After he'd sobered up he made the decision that he'd never ever lie to himself again. He might lie to everyone else until his pants were on fire. But never again to himself.

That decision was the reason he was here today, at his high school reunion. Because when he'd picked up his life again and changed career paths five years ago, he'd also taken a trip down memory lane, realizing that he might have tried to bury his desires in the darkest corner of his brain. But they were still burning bright and hot under the lid he'd buried them.

Six months after he'd lost his hand he'd gone to a club to still his curiosity, to see if he really was attracted to men and women in equal measures, if he needed both to feel whole. It turned out that he wasn't able to have sex with any of them, but he experienced everything else that the club had to offer. Whips, canes, floggers, and plugs. Used by men and women. He realized that a man's voice and touch could make him as aroused as a woman's. That it didn't matter if a man's hand or a woman's wrapped itself around his cock and pumped him into oblivion. He'd had some of the best orgasms of his life in that club, but something was still missing.

The special someone. Or in his case. Two special someones.

Every time he let his mind wander back to the last days of high school, to the scene he'd stumbled upon, his heart beat faster. He'd opened the door to the classroom upon hearing strange noises coming out of it, realizing too late what the noises were all about. That's how he found Graham and Emma, her body bent over a chair, her breasts swinging back and forth with each hard thrust, Graham's fingers wrapped tightly around her waist as he pounded into her, their guttural moans echoing through the room. He hadn't been able to avert his gaze, couldn't lift his feet and walk away, couldn't hide his arousal, and Graham's tantalizing words were still clear in his mind as if he'd just heard them yesterday, the memory of his hoarse voice still able to shoot shivers down his spine.

Join us, Killian. We both want you to.

Of course he'd fled the scene, completely embarrassed and totally aroused. He'd jerked himself off in a dark corner of the parking lot, semen spurting out of him as he'd rasped their names, his whole body shaking with the need to turn around and walk back to join them.

But he hadn't, and that had probably been the biggest mistake of his life.

He was here because of them. Because he needed to know if the reality lived up to his memories. If he still felt the same way. He was here to see if they still wanted him, even now. If they still wanted to share their bed with a broken man like him. And he was here to see if he still wanted them. If the low, burning ache in the pit of his stomach would finally disappear when he let himself fall into their arms.

He just needed to know.

Emma

Being in his arms had always made her feel safe, as if nothing could harm her. He'd always been her savior. Her best friend. Ever since he came into her life all those years ago, he'd saved her countless times. Kept her sane when she was about to crumble.

Her childhood had been a nightmare until her last foster home, until she met him. She'd been as wary as a wild animal at this point, but Graham had kept smuggling goodies past their foster parents, and with each treat her heart melted a little bit for him.

He'd protected her from the drunken rages of their foster father over and over again, taking the hits that were meant for her. But every time he'd hit Graham she'd felt it down to her bones, wishing they could just run away from it all. She hadn't thought they could make it on their own, but in the end they didn't have another choice.

She still remembered the blow that almost knocked her out, relived that horrible night in the nightmares that still haunted her from time to time. Graham had been her savior that night. Once again. He'd been the one who'd kept her safe on the streets afterwards, who'd made sure they had enough to eat, a place to sleep where they wouldn't freeze to death or be robbed at night. He'd picked pockets to help them scrape by. At least, she'd thought that was all he was doing, until she found him in a dark alley giving a man a blow job.

She'd been certain they'd both lose their lives that night, had feared the man would get to her when he was finished with Graham, but then a blonde angel had appeared right beside her and had knocked the other man out. David had saved them both back then, in more ways than one. He'd taken one look at them both and hadn't taken a no for an answer when he'd informed them that they were going home with him.

It hadn't been easy to trust anyone else other than Graham, but David and Mary Margaret had been extremely patient, and step by tentative step they'd broken down the walls Emma and Graham had built around them, earning their trust with every gentle touch, every soft caress. They had given them so much more than a bed to sleep in and food on the table. They had given them love. Unconditional love.

Just thinking about them made her eyes tear up with gratitude, and she turned around so that she could lean her head on Graham's shoulder as the memories of their old lives threatened to swallow her whole. But a press of his lips on her forehead and the gentle brush of his hand up and down her arm brought her back to the presence and she relaxed against him.

He always knew what she was feeling, always knew exactly what to do to calm her down. So it hadn't been a surprise that she'd chosen him to be the first man she slept with. There hadn't even been the slightest hesitation, and she'd never regretted it. It had been perfect.

They'd been living with David and Mary Margaret for about three years and the time had felt right. It had been tentative, a little bit clumsy, but it had been Graham. When he finally slipped inside her, she'd wished he could stay with him like this forever.

But it didn't last. They'd dated through high school, had incredible sex together, but there was still something missing, and they both realized it at the exact same moment. When Killian walked in on them having sex.

She'd been fascinated by Killian for months, but his shy demeanor had never given her an opening to approach him. He'd always blushed profusely when she'd come near him, and they'd hardly spoken more than a few words at a time, but still she'd wanted him.

However, life had led them on different paths and she'd never seen him again.

Over the years Killian had drifted to the recesses of her mind, other things coming to the forefront. College, men, sex, her first job as a social worker. Months went by without her thinking about him, but then she saw a person that reminded her of him. Rather, Graham made a comment about their old high school days and he was back in her thoughts.

She and Graham had broken up right after high school, trying their luck with others. But there had only been one long-term relationship for either of them. Peter for Graham and Neal for her. Maybe they should have counted themselves lucky to get out before it was too late. Before Graham ended up with an incurable disease or she was shackled to a man she didn't really love. They'd both had their respective scares – Graham when he feared Peter might have infected him with HIV, and when she feared she might be pregnant with Neal's child.

The scares had brought them back together, and they were trying to make it work this time around, accepting the fact that they wouldn't be happy without a third party involved. Two men had been willing to share their bed so far, and Emma had to admit it had been quite fulfilling, but neither she nor Graham had felt that certain spark. She was almost at the point of giving up hope of finding that again.

But standing here inside their old high school the memories came back with a vengeance, the image of Killian staring at them popping back up in her brain. Suddenly she knew with a clarity that scared her a little bit that he might be the one who'd be able to complement them. The missing person they'd searched for but never found.

He just needed to show up.

Graham

Days like this always made him remember the bad times. It was just inevitable. The years spent in foster care, the beatings he'd endured to keep the other children safe. The bruises hadn't really bothered him; he could take it. And he'd do it all over again to make sure Emma was safe.

The rage came back every time he let himself think about his last foster home, the one he'd shared with Emma. The night was still crystal clear in his mind even after all these years, her cries and pleas and screams when he'd rushed into the house and pushed the door to her room opened. He'd yanked the son of a bitch who had been their foster father off her body and snapped his head back when his fist met his jaw. Fortunately, their foster father had been too drunk to hit back, his eyes had rolled back when Graham hit him again, and he'd slumped to the ground. He thanked God every day that he'd been just in time to prevent the worst. Their foster father hadn't raped her. But Emma had been shaking like a leaf, her eyes red with tears, her cheek swollen. One look at her had been enough to make the decision easy.

They'd fled that night with only the clothes on their backs and a few dollars to survive the first days out on the street. He'd been thirteen and Emma twelve, and he'd had no idea how they'd get along, but they'd managed, though the next two years on the street had been a living hell. He'd never tell Emma everything he'd done to keep them both alive and safe. He'd have preferred to keep it all away from her, but she'd stumbled upon him in a dark alley, finding him on his knees while an old, fat man had shoved his cock into his mouth until he'd gagged.

Emma's appearance had thrown the man into a rage and he'd slapped Emma and pushed her hard against the wall. He couldn't do anything to help her; he'd been still short of breath, his vision swimming. Then the man had thrust his cock back into his mouth and fucked him so hard and deep that he'd believed he'd suffocate while the man's huge dick blocked his airway.

He'd survived only because a police officer had walked by and saved them. It was the day David and Mary Margaret came into their lives, the day everything changed. He'd never be able to repay them for all they'd done for them. They'd given them a home. A real home. And they'd given them love. Something they'd needed as much as a roof over their heads and food on the table.

He tried not to think about those two years on the streets too often, hoped he'd been convincing when Emma asked him once. He hoped she still believed that had been it, him blowing strangers in dark alleys. But there had been more. A couple of times he'd gone further. They'd needed the money desperately, and after all it hadn't been that bad. He'd been sure to lube up beforehand and that the johns didn't go bareback, and both times it had been over very quickly. It hadn't been pleasant, but it hadn't killed him.

Back then he'd done it for money, never thought that he might actually enjoy being with a man one day. But he'd developed feelings for Killian back in high school, even if nothing ever came of it.

And then he met Peter. His throat closed up as he thought of his ex-boyfriend, the one he believed was his second half for a very long time. Until Peter went to Thailand for a year with Doctors Without Borders - he received an email six months later, Peter telling him that he'd been an asshole and cheated on him. He might have forgiven him for that - after he'd run all the tests to make sure Peter hadn't left him with an STI - but Peter had cut all ties. He didn't hear from him for three years up until six weeks ago, when a friend had brought him the news that Peter had died two months ago of AIDS.

He'd been shaken up, Emma the rock he needed more than he needed the air to breathe. She stayed with him when he broke down completely, and when he drew her into his arms afterwards - when she took him into her body without hesitation, without questions - he realized that he'd been fooling himself for years. He could never be whole without having an intimate relationship with Emma, even though he knew no matter how hard they tried, they weren't enough for each other.

He still needed a man in his life, too, and Emma might not say it out loud, but he knew that she wasn't satisfied with one man either. And there was one man they both couldn't forget, the one man that stumbled upon them, the one man they both wanted.

For some reason, Killian had always been the only one he wanted to be a bottom for. Even back when Killian had been a clumsy, lanky teenager in his soccer team. He had to admit he'd checked him out a few times in the showers, and even though Killian's body had been lean and lacking in serious muscles, Graham had still felt a tug of need every time he'd looked at him. Something in Killian's eyes had always drawn him in, like a moth to a flame. He'd never trusted anyone enough to let them top him, but with Killian it had been different. He didn't even know if Killian was bi, didn't even know if he wanted them as much as they wanted him, but he was determined to find out one way or the other. He'd waited too damn long for an answer to that question.

"You think he'll come?" Emma asked, reading his mind effortlessly.

"You've never forgotten him, have you?" he replied, wrapping his arms more firmly around her.

"Have you?"

Her hair tickled his throat and he dropped his head down to bury his face in the blonde strands, taking in a deep breath before he closed his eyes and murmured, "No, I haven't."

They stood motionless for quite some time, ignoring the people milling around them. But suddenly he felt a jolt low in his stomach and his eyes snapped opened, wandering to the entrance on their own accord.

"He's here," Emma whispered, her nails digging painfully into his skin as her hands tightened around his arms. "God, he is beautiful."

He couldn't give her an answer, couldn't tear his eyes away from the man standing at the entrance. Emma was right. He was beautiful. Every fiber of his body started to vibrate with the need to touch him, kiss him, feel him move against his own skin. His cock twitched in his pants, and Emma groaned, rocking her ass against his hardening arousal. He knew if he slipped his fingers under her panties she'd be soaking wet, desperate to be stretched and filled.

His intense reaction to Killian didn't really surprise him; deep down he'd always known he was the one. But until today he hadn't known that Emma desired Killian probably as much as he did, and when she shifted restlessly against him, little moans spilling from her lips while her eyes kept track of Killian's movements, something inside of him clicked into the right place. A place that had been empty for far too long.

The man that had just stepped back into their lives was the missing piece. The person both Emma and he were searching for, the person they'd both longed for all these years.

He was the perfect fit.