Disclaimer: I don't own the X-Men!
Title: What we made.
"Chere! Hey, bon jour, come in, please, I didn't- how did y' know I got into town? I arrived just last night, come in s'il te plait".
His hair was a tad longer, but besides that, he was the same Remy she hadn't seen or heard of in a year. When looking towards the future, a year from now seems like a whole load of time at our disposition, but looking back at it, it doesn't seem like much after all: just a chunk of life that's out of reach. It didn't matter. For Rogue, it'd been the strangest year imaginable.
"Well, word spreads fast".
Same couch and same everything, when he closed the door behind her back.
She had to chuckle a little on the inside, because he looked like he couldn't believe his eyes. And of course, after all this time and especially after the way they split up, the last thing he'd have expected was for her to suddenly take the first step on… whatever this was.
"Was planning on dropping by though wasn't sure y'd want to see me. Not like that ever stopped me anyway, but, I'm glad y're here." She didn't reply. "How y've been?"
After vacillating one more time, she spoke: "Remy, Ah have to tell yah this… one thing."
"Got a lot to tell y' too, wanna take a seat?"
"No, but yah should… no, let's sit down, yeah".
Months passing by and all of them quarrels back at the Bayou hadn't been enough to erase her presence from him. He wanted to think she wasn't someone he used to know; he knew her, he'd seen her in all of the range of moods someone could experience, both good and bad ones. However, he couldn't tell if he'd ever seen her with this… unease.
At first, each word required a huge effort from her:
"Listen, Ah know… Ah shoulda told yah before… Ah know if Ah'd tried to find yah, Ah could have… Ah know that." She hadn't expected it to get a little easier as she went on: "Back then, we were so mad at each other and Ah was super mad, but in spite of that Ah know Ah should have-"
"Non, non, cherie, écoutez: it don't matter what we said or didn't say, it all in the past now and-"
"Rem, yah have a daughter."
"-what matters that we ca-"
His words turned into a sort of exhalation right then, as he stared at her, trying to find any clue in her features or anywhere else, that could give some light about what she'd just uttered.
It just didn't make sense up in his mind, it was a thing of madness.
"Y're kidding" he ventured, a smirk vanishing before it even had the chance to surface: "Y' ain't kidding. Y'r kidding?"
She shook her head slightly, enough for him to get up, go to the opposite end of the room and back.
"Y', wait, y're telling me we have a… child, a real person child?"
"A literal flesh and bone child, yeah." She got back on her feet as well: "Ah know this is pretty… shocking, to say the least and Ah swear Ah didn't know until after yah left. Ah was so messed up back then and it's no excuse, Ah'm really not trying to excuse myself for not telling yah before but, well… now yah know."
He kept on gaping at her for what seemed to be an eternity. Would she suddenly start laughing? Haha, you fell, haha, you got me? Seemed not.
"Mais c'est pas possible, mais c'est possible, mon Dieu, Rogue! How can y' tell me this now, why didn't y' tell me 'fore?! I woulda come back, I woulda…"
"Oh really?"
He had to run his hands over his face when hearing this:
"Alright, I dunno who y' think I am, I dunno anything right now, but I do know I wouldn't just abandon a child of mine and I wouldn't…"
"What? Yah wouldn't what?"
He continued in a lower voice: "…abandon y' either."
All of the reasons she'd had at some point seemed absurd now, seeing him letting himself fall back on the couch, half his face buried in between his hands and lost stare. Because no matter what, he deserved to know from the start. No matter how terrified she was of scaring him away (he was right, who did she think he was?) or how badly things had got in the end. So as soon as she learnt he was back, she knew she had to face it and come tell him, without expectations for herself, or at least trying to choke any that could try to pop up.
She sat down by his side.
"Ah'm sorry, Remy. It's not enough, Ah know… we both made a lot of mistakes in our time together but… something good came out of it." He turned to face her. "Wanna meet her?"
That instant felt just like before with him so near, but magnified a thousand times, which she wouldn't have believed possible.
"Course… course I wanna meet her. Dieu…"
"Okay. She's home."
"Home? So, is it time for climbing up the balcony, like in the good ol' days?"
"Ah guess that'd be a little-"
"Ridiculous at this point?"
"Exactly. Also they say it's okay, that yah can go and everything."
"Bon". How many times had she imagined him by her side during all these months? More that she'd admit even to herself. "What's her name?"
He saw her smile.
"Emily".
He nodded:
"I like it".
(…)
They made it past the Professor, Jean and Scott and surprisingly enough, it hadn't been as awkward as Rogue had expected. Everyone just greeted each other like old acquaintances that didn't use to be enemies, and moved on, in spite of Cyclops's unsuccessful attempt at small talk. Then, she and Remy took the mansion's main stairs up. He'd never taken this route to her room, at least not in plain day light. Those times when she'd sneak out to meet him, when she started going out with the delinquent/former Acolyte, to everyone's dismay, didn't seem too far away, they were crystal clear in his head. And yet… everything had changed so much all of a sudden.
Having a child.
They had a child.
Enough to make anyone's brain explode, but he'd keep it together. He had to, even if he was walking in autopilot.
"Why, hello there!"
They ran into Storm in one of the second floor's corridors.
"Stormy, ça va?"
"I am well and you? It has been a long time since you… visited us."
"Oui. I have a child."
Ororo laughed with that big smile of hers: "I know!"
"Oui, oui, seems everyone was well informed, except me."
All right, at least he was taking it with some humor now.
"Désolé, I had to say that" he added, once it was only the two of them again.
"Nah, please, be my guest. It was accurate, anyway". There was her bedroom, still the same one. Before opening up the door, she turned to him once more: "Ready?"
"Ready? Chere, couple hours ago I was just a Cajun back in town, wondering if he'd ever find a way to see y' again, and now I'm someone's father? But then, y' probably weren't ready either and y' still did it, all of it, so if y' were ready, hell, I'm ready."
She should have known this would be his reaction. What had she been so scared of?
The large room had a balcony at the bottom, through which the twilight's orange glow hit anyone coming in right in the face. He spotted new items around, starting with a white cradle that gave him some sort of vertigo, so it was best not focusing on that, but yeah, on the balcony: there was movement there, someone was there.
"Hey, Kit" he heard Rogue say.
"HI!"
They both emerged from the balcony: Kitty Pryde and in her arms, a tiny little curled up human being.
"Hey Remy, good to see you! How are you?" He nodded once in response. "Oh my God, she behaved so well, I had to change her diaper but I'm totally getting really good at it, I think I can do it in like two minutes overall and then we sang some songs, well I sang some songs, she just kind of babbled every once in a while, but I think she was digging it and oh! Oh my God, I'm such an idiot." Emily had been facing the other side all this time, so Kitty placed herself better so he could see her: "Who's that? Oh my God, who's this? Oh I know! It's daddy! Yeah! Excuse my manners, please." She held one of the little hands towards Remy: "Nice to meet you!"
Like it was something that could get stained upon touching, he approached like in slow motion. What a handshake.
Kitty went on: "Yeah! Nice to meet you, I think we're gonna get along really well and uh… hmm… I think I should go, I have this… Danger Room session, yeah, I totally forgot."
"Thanks Kit" Rogue told her, when receiving Emily in her arms: "Yah're the best."
"Of course I am, I'm the babysitter in the world, I know! Bye Remy, it's good that you're here and… and all, okay, I'll go."
He had no idea what Kitty said or if she had left. The only thing he could perceive was this little person resting so comfy and naturally against Rogue's chest.
No one said a word for a while. The only one that moved was Emily, kicking around a few times in her clear yellow outfit.
"Wanna hold her?"
Hold her?
"Oui, non, what if I drop her?"
"Yah won't drop her!" she chuckled: "Come on, just hold her, like so."
Remy had carried people, weights, loads of stuff back at his cousin's business; he'd fought hundreds of times and beat the heck out of countless people, not only with his staff and with his powers, but with his bare hands. But he didn't trust his own strength for this. He felt his feet were now made of cotton and therefore, so were his arms, which could fail at any moment at the proximity of this thing that was so completely fragile, so dependant on others to exist and be okay.
He tried to put that line of thought aside, as Rogue didn't wait for another answer and placed Emily in his arms, now against his chest.
Neither of them would have been able to explain what was going through their minds right then.
"Yah look…"
"Quoi? Am I doing it wrong?"
"Nah, it's just that yah look kind of terrified and Ah don't think Ah'd ever seen yah like that."
"I don't look terrified, cherie: I am. Think I should sit." He went to the couch and Rogue sat by his side again, like that was the place to be. "Tu es si petite… pour quoi est-ce que tu es si petite, hein? Look at her, Rogue, she's so small. Look at this small face and small little hands. Look at the small little fingers. She's so perfect I can't believe it". Emily whimpered a little, but then calmed down again. "And look at… look at her eyes, chere, mon Dieu!" Outside the irises, Emily's eyes were as white as everyone else's; the pupils were mostly dark, but traces of crimson red were quite visible in them. "That okay? She okay?"
"Yeah, Beast checked her and said she's okay, it's just the way her eyes are, 'cause she's most likely… a mutant too."
"Course." He cupped the back of that little head in his hand, like this way he could already try to protect her from what being born a mutant implied. "Chere, I can't begin to imagine how hard this must have been for y', when y' found out, and all of this, y've done it on your own and-"
"Well-"
"-no, wait, I ain't saying y' can't do it on your own, y' could. I'm just saying I wish I'd been there for the two of y'".
"Ah wasn't really just on my own, yah know? Everyone's helped me a lot and yeah, at first it was… tough, but Ah knew Ah would… have her, Ah wouldn't have done it any other way. They all freaked out at the beginning, but by now pretty much everyone in this house has had their share of babysitting. Even Logan."
"Ah oui?"
"Once. For five minutes. Then she puked on him."
"That's the spirit, petite."
Resting against him, Emily seemed to be more comfortable than he had expected. So was he.
(…)
In the last few months Rogue hadn't had much sleep, sure, but that night she wasn't even trying. She'd been mad at him for so long and it just felt so useless now.
She didn't want to think about what would come next, though, if anything at all would. Not yet.
What time was it? Around midnight, maybe 1 am, she could tell now without checking the actual time. She sat up in her bed and just stayed there, staring at him for a while: with his back to her, he was leaning over the cradle.
"Look what we made, chere" she heard him whisper: "We made a life".
The little thing was sleeping in there, stranger to any stupid thing either one of her parents had ever done, to Cerebro's scans, mutant powers or Danger Room sessions, to government controls for the gifted or evil mutants. None of that existed for her yet; she was still just a blank canvas, what would be of her depending, mostly, of the two other people in the room.
Remy continued: "And I remember we made it with love".
Her stomach churned a bit: "Yeah… Ah remember." But she had to say it one more time: "And Ah'm sorry, again. Ah didn't have the right to keep this from yah-"
"Hush that. D'accord, we both agree it wasn't the best choice, but I'm willing to leave that in the past now. Rogue, I don't plan on being anywhere far from y' or her. If y' let me."
He seemed sincere… goddamn you and your doubts, Rogue: he'd always been.
"Okay, Ah just think we should take it one day at a time."
"Bien sur, pas de problem."
Moments later, she was back into her bed and he was back in the couch, both unable to really sleep. On the other hand, someone in a little green onesie would soon be hungry again, but as for now, she was still dreaming of this voice she had never heard before, that spoke differently, with different words even, a language she'd never heard. But that she liked. It felt safe.
END.
Note: Hello everyone! This fic appeared in my head one night this week I couldn't sleep well. When I got up in the morning, I knew I had spent about 7 hours watching it in my head like it was a movie. Now, I know Rogue and Remy do have kids at some point of the insane Marvel continuity, and I know her name is Rebecca, but I just preferred to name her different. Hope you guys enjoyed this and please remember to tell me what you thought of it! Have a great week
