Hey everyone. Sorry I've been gone for a super long time. I haven't been feeling inspiration so coming up with ideas and writing stories has been rather difficult. But the groove is making its' way back to my brain so there's hope yet. I was challenged to write a funny fantasy short story so here it is. The work of a strange mind. My strange mind.
Long ago in a tall tower lived an old wizard who never left the tower since the day he was born. And he didn't know why. One day-two days ago rather- the wizard was cleaning his lab equipment when he felt a gust of wind leave his behind.
"Excuse me," he chuckled to no one in particular; he had become accustomed to his solitude. No amounts of his "passing gas" moments could possibly embarrass him. As he turned around to get his beaker, his bare wrinkled toe touched something dry. He looked down and saw a teaspoon of dust, gray as a storm cloud, dry as sand. The wizard frowned. "Odd, I could've sworn I dusted this place this morning." With the snap of his fingers, he summoned a broom and swept the spot. He then proceeded to sweep the entire floor, passing gas and saying excuse me every minute or so.
But by the time he finished the floors, the walls- the solo window even- were blanketed with dust. The old wizard groaned and commanded the broom to sweep up every last speck of dust. The broom continued its' work, having no other purpose. The wizard, satisfied that the cleaning was done, plopped himself on his rocking chair and read his book.
An hour later he stood up stretched and let out a fart. Suddenly the broom flew right behind him, swept the chair and dashed off to the nearest corner, as though awaiting the dust bunnies. The wizard raised an eyebrow. Where was the dust coming from? And why is the dust appearing right when the wizard-
The wizard's eyes widened. "Good golly how old am I?" As soon as he uttered that simple question, his fragile body crumbled to the ground. Then his body decayed- not in the way human bodies decay- into the familiar course form of dust. Then the broom entered the scene and swept the dust under the rug, patted the rug then dashed off to the only corner of the tower.