Title: Five Scenes at Midnight
Author: kiki39
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I don't own Smallville or DC's characters.
Summary: Christmas season with Lois and Clark and the evolution of their relationship.
Note: This was posted for DI's 2007 Secret Santa Exchange. The prompts: Season 7, PG-13, Midnight. And a big thanks to Annie M. for the great beta service.
1: Realization
This was my destiny and in it was the voyage of my longing, and in it my longing fell, in you everything sank!
The Song of Despair - Pablo Neruda
Kent Farm, November 2007 - 11:51 PM
Clark Kent watched as the tiny brunette paced around the kitchen, gathering bits and pieces of Christmas tradition into her arms with little regard for their fragile forms.
He cringed at the thought of her breaking the bulbs, but was unwilling to speak. He found himself tuning out after he'd mentally checked off the key words: secrets; lies; Lex; dead parents, commitment... yup, she had all her bases covered.
Just over a month until Christmas and there was still so much to be done. His mother wouldn't be back from Washington until the 23rd, which meant if he wanted the Kent traditional Christmas it would be up to him. And Lana.
Clark felt like his life was doomed to play out as a melodramatic soap opera - or maybe a sci-fi one - that continued beyond the expiration date; an endlessly repeating loop of disagreements and half-reconciliations.
Her eyes were starting to tear up and her head was tilting to the left. It was time for him to respond. "Lana, don't get upset--"
"I'm not upset!" Lana snapped. She looked like a twelve-year-old, and Clark was tempted to send her to her room. Her face was screwed into a pout and he couldn't believe this was his life, and his little girl to take care of.
He shook his head in frustration. "I can't do this anymore."
Lana whipped her head towards him. "What?"
"This. Us" he gestured between them, helplessly. "It's not working. All we do is fight. I'm tired of trying so hard to make this work."
With Lana's face turning a bright pink, her lips pressed into a tight line, and eyes narrowed to tiny slits, Clark almost couldn't recognize her. She resembled a baby about to let loose a howling wail.
The shriek of anger she emitted came close. "You're tired, Clark? You're tired? Every time this happens. Why can't you make up your mind and figure out what's worth fighting for. Aren't we worth it? Aren't I?"
Clark unclenched his jaw and took a deep calming breath. "I know you're upset; we haven't been able to talk about anything for a while. Everything turns into an argument. I can't keep doing this."
Tears streamed silently down her flushed face. "That's it, then? You won't even try."
He could hear the disappointment in her voice and he felt awful; but he'd made a decision, unconsciously perhaps, but now that it was made he felt relieved. "I'm sorry, Lana."
She sniffled and dropped her head as if the answers could be found on the ground.
Clark waited, unsure of what to do or say. You'd think he'd be used to that by now. He jumped as Lana spoke. "You know this is it, don't you? I'm not going to come back again."
He nodded, and when she didn't look up, he added, "I know."
Her eyes met his for a long moment, as if gauging the commitment and certainty of his words. "We tried" he offered lamely, "It just didn't work."
She blinked twice. "I guess not. I'll go stay with Chloe tonight. I'll come back tomorrow for my stuff." She turned and walked away. Clark watched her, feeling a strange mix of sadness and relief. She stopped and looked over her shoulder and met his gaze. "I hope you find something worth fighting for, Clark" she tried to smile, but it looked painful. "Otherwise it'll be a very lonely life."
TBC
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