Disclaimer; obviously, I don't own Jacob OR Edward I wish, Bella :S , or the Twilight Series Cry. From all that, you must understand already that I am not Stephenie Meyer Awwwww.
The pain had become too much.
I was never going to admit it, but the inside of me was in tatters. Tatters that were not worth the time spent, the hurt she had caused me without a second thought.
Each reach and climb took me closer to relief, to having that ever-growing pain removed from me. The pain, which had taken place of all my missing pieces; pieces that had been torn to shreds by her, the girl I loved.
It was like they say, 'The first cut is the deepest', but each cut seemed to drag deeper and deeper until there was nothing left of me to tear. I just kept bleeding out.
And I couldn't blame her for the blood - she loved me in a different way than I loved her. But all the apologies she had exchanged for the false hope for any sort of us I had felt, wouldn't, and couldn't, close that first cut just below my stomach that will never heal; that throbbed with any thought or memory of her. I could only blame myself for letting me need her like I need the air I breathe.
I approached my anticipated end; letting the sharp, cold wind I had been longing for graze my eyes. The never-ending blue sky and sea welcomed me. For the first time in a long time, I felt wanted, and for this, I was grateful.
I could feel that cut below my stomach growing, just so it could let the last of my sanity escape me. Here and now, I could finally accept it, and agree. I was dead inside.
I embraced this new pain as a sadistic sort of relief before turning for the very last threshold.
Goodbye, pain. Goodbye, Bella.
Broken, yet I tumbled freely. I continued to bleed apart in the open air.
'Cold, cold water surrounds me now.
Can you hear me now? I am lost, without hope.'
I stopped fighting the current, and let what pieces of me I had left, the pieces that I hadn't stupidly given away, go.
'And the water turned red.'