I looked down at the ticket, trying to concentrate through all the noise of the teeming train station. Nine and three quarters? Who the bloody hell wrote this? I growled and felt like throwing something. I was standing in the middle of platform nine and ten, the hectic people pushing past me. I'm sure I looked as lost as I felt. I watched as some girls and boys my age laughed and joked, walking past me, with out even noticing. I observed them for a moment, contemplating following them, with the assumption they were going to the same place I was, when suddenly they disappeared. I blinked and focused my eyes on the wall where they unexpectedly vanished. Then I saw another pair of students walk straight towards the brick column, and again they were sucked in and passed from sight. I sucked in a breath, keeping my face emotionless as usual, as I pushed through the throngs of people rudely to examine the red pilaster in question. I poked it, and the surface felt just like a brick wall. Examining it up and down one last time, I took a step back, eyeing the obstruction like it was some how offending me. I heard a light, and friendly laugh from behind me, and I swung around to find this unwelcome intruder and wallop them, but I came face to face with a friendly smile. A thin pretty girl, with wild deep auburn hair, stood before me, and I found myself forgetting my violent plans and wondered if she could possibly help me with my obvious dilemma. She walked up to the wall and patted it affectionately, I found myself frowning. She smiled—a thin twitch of her lips.
"It wont work unless you build up some speed. Come on I'll show you." She took her suitcase and flung it at the wall, as it disappeared. She started to back up and motioned for me to follow. We walked several passes back, and I looked around anxiously, wondering if this was normal to the other people in the station. "Okay, you go first and then, Ill follow. That way, if you have any trouble I can help you. Its harder to get back through once your on the other side already." She smiled encouragingly, but I wasn't convinced. I looked at her suspiciously.
"You want me to run at a wall? Sorry, but I don't feel like smashing my face in." I said coldly, crossing my arms over my chest. She only laughed slightly, her hair bouncing around her shoulders.
"Fine, Ill go first. But once I'm through come right after, were almost late." And with that she ran at the wall and vanished. I glared at the bricks again. Unsure of what to do.
"Alright, wall, if this doesn't work, you're so going to be a heap of cement." I muttered as I readied my self to do the stupidest thing on earth. With one last breath of air, I flung myself at the column and to my dismay; I was sucked in a spit out on the other side. I took a lurching step to keep my balance, and gripped my bag tightly. I looked up and the red headed girl was waiting for me with another one of her light smiles.
"Good work." She grinned. "Its tough at first." She said tossing her head in the direction of a new train. "Come on, they just called the passengers aboard. I'm Lily by the way." I nodded and followed her aboard the train.
"Im Kira." She smiled and nodded.
"I know, there's been a lot of talk about you over the summer." I grimaced and she dimpled apologetically.
"Great." I muttered sarcastically, and she laughed as she lead the way to a separate compartment of the train.
We walked along the aisle of the train, looking for a compartment, as it picked up speed and raced by the blurring scenery. On the way some people slid the doors to their compartment open—especially the boys—and made rude, and perverted comments, which Lily and I both responded with scathing glares that made them flinch away. We talked lightly—or tried, all my comments were rare, usually sarcastic, and cold—as we walked until we found an empty one. Both of us slid into the seats after putting our bags in the overhead compartments, and Lily slid over and locked the wooden, and frosted glass door. I quirked a finely arched brow questioningly.
"I don't want any one trying to strike up a conversation." She said bitterly and I nodded in agreement. She sighed, looking disgusted, "Happens every year, it's usually Potter and Black, but I have a feeling with you," she said looking at me head to toe. I didn't flinch at her gaze, but waited for her to continue. "You're super gorgeous. So there might be other guys trying to hit it off with you." She explained, and my eyebrows shot up at her comment. She ignored me.
"Who are Potter and Black? And why do they usually come?" I asked, saying their names with dislike, because by Lily's way of describing them didn't sound all that great. She laughed at my tone and answered faintly with a wave of her hand.
"James Potter has this pathetic crush on me, and Sirius Black will flirt with anything that moves, which usually happens to be my friends." I didn't like these people already.
"So," She asked, cocking her head to one side curiously "if you don't mind me asking, why are you starting Hogwarts as a sixth year?" My face became stone, and my dark blue eyes darkened visibly. She noted my expression, and smiled understandingly. "You don't have to tell me, I'm not making you." And then she changed the subject.
It has been three hours on this bloody train, and I swear I was going to pull all my hair out. I felt uncomfortable and jittery, like I had to do laps on the train or else I was going to go nuts. I groaned, frustratingly and banged my head lightly on the cool glass window. Lily, who looked equally as bored nodded her head in agreement. I found myself taking an unusual liking to Lily, and she seemed to share the feeling. It wasn't often I liked someone; it was usually just a tolerance, or complete dislike, so when Lily and I hit it off so quickly, it naturally surprised me. The window was fogging, as it grew colder outside as night fell, and warmer inside the train. I ran my finger over the glass, and silently started making little stars all over the window. My fingers made squeaking noises as I pressed them against the glass. Lily, who had been watching me, joined in also, and together we covered the entire glass window in little star shapes carved into the thin layer of fog. After we finished boredom settled over us again, and I sighed stripping off my thin coat.
"I swear, were going to suffocate in here." I said in reference to the stuffy atmosphere in our cabin.
"Ugh, I know," she said slipping her coat off as well, and tossing down the bench. Her eyes caught on my wrist and she turned her gaze on me curiously. I pulled the sleeve of my shirt of my shirt downward, covering my unusual mark with the fabric. She didn't press it further. Just then a figure appeared at our door, looking in, his head bobbing, while he was knocking franticly. Lily rolled her eyes and said, "go away James." She called through the door, crossing her arms. He shook his head, looking down the hallway distractedly.
"No Lily! Come on, let me in! I'm toast if they get a hold of me!" Lily looked torn, and stood up. She opened the door, just to tell him off and see what was wrong, but when the lock unhitched, James pushed his way through the door. He closed and locked it just as a group of people ran by, shouting swear words. He sunk down of the bench next to Lily, who did not look happy, James on the other hand looked very pleased with himself. "Phew" he said, wiping his brow, and grinning like an idiot. He was looking at Lily. "That was a close one. Thanks for saving me Li-lei." She frowned and ignored him. "Merlin, I hope Padfoot got outta that one, those Slytherins did not look happy." He grinned again, leaning towards Lily, who in response leaned away. I watched them curiously, unsure if Lily wanted me to help her with this idiotic boy, or stay out. It was hard to tell if she was enjoying his attention, or despised it. "Say, whose this?" James wagged his eyebrows suggestively at me. I stiffened. Lily spoke for the first time James showed up so rudely.
"This is Kira." She said motioning towards me. But James didn't look, he just smiled cutely at Lily.
"Its so good hear your voice again, Evans." He tossed his arm around her slim shoulders, smirking, and she shrugged him off.
"Get out Potter." She said flatly.
"Now Lily, its gunna take a little more than that to persuade me. How 'bout …" He pretended to think for a moment. "If you give me a hug—just a hug!—I'll leave." He grinned goofily, as Lily shoved him. He stood feigning to be hurt, "fine, ill sit next to Kira." He sniffed, plopping down next to me and tossing an arm around my shoulders. I stiffened, and turned my head slowly toward him.
". Hand. Off. Of. Me." I growled dangerously. He dropped his hands like I was burning hot, and looked taken aback by my deadly tone lethal glare. He shuffled away from me.
"Sheesh, I better warn Sirius about you. Your feisty." He shivered under my glower, and looked at Lily who was smirking proudly at me. "I think I'd rather get beat up by Evan's than sit next to you." He said sliding back next to Lily. I relaxed visibly, and flicked my eyes back and forth from James to the door, signaling to Lily, we should get him out. We made eye contact and she nodded. James was happily oblivious. We both stood up suddenly, and James looked bewildered. "What's going on here? Are we having a standing up party?" He asked jumping up too, right in front of the door. We both smirked at each other, as I lunged at the door unlocking and pushing it open. James looked extremely confused, and Lily, once the door swung open, shoved him and yanked the door shut as I flicked the lock. "Hey!" Came James's confused voice. "That wasn't very nice!"
Lily and I looked at each other, and she stated laughing hysterically, and for the first time since I can remember, I smiled, enjoying her amusement with her. And we both settled down for the rest of the train ride.
---
Lily lead me to the head masters office, since I was apparently a sixth year, and had never gone to the school before, I needed to be sorted. We walked through the large wooden doors without knocking, and an elderly man who sat at a desk cluttered with stacks of paper and files. His hair and beard was silvery white and was waist length on his large black robes. He smiled sincerely at us as we walked in, his blue gray eyes crinkling with age as he did so.
"Welcome back Miss Evans, and...?" he swept his hand in my direction. My face was unreadable as always as he motioned towards me.
"Kira Thornhill," I stated, without an ounce of emotion leaking into my voice. He raised his white bushy eyebrows.
"Ah…yes. Miss Thornhill, we've been expecting you." He smiled. I did not return the gesture.
"I prefer Kira." I disclosed, looking him in the eye. For a moment he seemed flustered at my comment, but he hide it well, and let it go.
"All right, Kira" he smiled at something unknown, and continued. "I presume you are here to be sorted." I nodded stiffly and he stood from his chair, and moved surprisingly fast to a ceiling high bookshelf behind his desk. He climbed the ladder, and carefully pulled down a worn black hat, then, equally as graceful, descended the ladder and walked back over to us. Lily stood off to the corner as the man known as Dumbledore (as Lily informed me earlier) approached with a stool and the hat. I watched quietly, as he set the dull grey wooden stool down in front of me, and patted its surface patiently, waiting for me to sit down. I hesitated, glaring at the hat in his hand. Why the hell does he have a hat? I mean, a hat? Really? Has the world gone nuts? I smoothed the pleated skirt of my new uniform as I sat, keeping my eyes suspiciously on the old man standing before me. The lights behind him on the desk flicked on suddenly, and I jumped up, readying myself for anything. Dumbledore had his wand out; I scowled, wishing I hadn't left mine in my trunk, but then visibly relaxed when I realized he was just turning the lights on in his office with the slim magical rod, not in any way attacking Lily or I. My body sank back onto the old stool, my fingers gripping the splintered worn wood, before calming my racing adrenaline. My eyes adjusted quickly to the burning lights.
"I hope you don't mind," Dumbledore said, his face soft as he reviewed my scowling expression, squinting at the lights above. "It was getting considerably dark in here." He finished, his tone was sincerely friendly, and understanding, it looked like under those marshy eyes, he knew more about what was going on then he let on. Although this made me weary, as I didn't want him to know my secrets, I was somewhat relieved that all the weight on my shoulders could be shared and I wouldn't have to carry it by myself. I silently noted him as someone to potentially confide in.
He stepped forward and placed the mangled ancient hat upon my head carefully, then stepped back. The black hat instantly came to life above me, tangling my hair as it swiveled from side to side, finding a comfortable spot; I glowered at the brim of the witch hat just above my forehead.
"Ahh…" spoke the raspy and harsh voice of the headwear making itself oh-so at home upon my head. "Lets see, lets see…" I felt a probing within my mind, like someone was trying to get inside brain. I stayed perfectly still, clenching the wood of the stool until my knuckles turned white to prevent myself from ripping the hat off my head and hurling it as far away as I could manage. The room was silent. "Would you mind," the sorting hat asked irritably. "In order to sort you I need to look into your thoughts." The hat rasped shifting upon the shiny surface of my dark hair. Dumbledore's face was blank as he cleared his throat.
"Whatever do you mean, my dear friend?" His voice echoed softly off the walls.
"I mean," the hat replied, "that this girl is blocking her mind." He sounded more than annoyed. The old mans face remained blank, as he looked at me.
"Miss Thornhill—"
"Kira." I cut him off, my voice and face equally as frosty.
"Kira," he continued slowly. "Would you care to let our sorting hat do its job? This is what you came for, is it not?" I scowled, wondering what the hell he wanted to do. Stop thinking? Dumbledore seemed to see through my emotionless face and saw my confusion. "Just relax." I crinkled my nose and glowered, hesitantly relaxing my body, and took a brief, but deep breath. I focused on relaxing, but my mind kept spinning out of control, trailing off in different directions.
It took some time; everyone was patient with me, although I was getting increasingly frustrated with myself. I hated being weak. The hat grunted in approval. And I realized that he had gotten what he wanted. He was in my mind.
Could everyone feel this hat rummaging through their head like this? It felt like a rabid squirrel was going nuts with in my cranium. I squeezed my eyes shut, listening to the throb of my ever-increasing headache. This was turning out to be a tiring day. I cringed and my stomach dropped as I thought of sleeping. Or more precisely my nightmares. I didn't want to deal with them tonight, or any night for that matter. Maybe, they would finally leave my alone. I almost laughed hollowly at that. Never, ever would the nightmares end. But what scarred me the most about these supposed nightmares was the fact that they could be memories.
"Mmhm hmm…" the hat drawled lazily, making me open my eyes and wince slightly as my head pounded in tune with my heart. "You have an exquisite mind," he continued, and I found myself getting increasingly annoyed with this black ancient fabric. I restrained my thoughts of torture. "Interesting, interesting…you have the darkness, and power of Slytherin…I can tell…but you have rebelled against your darker side…I can see the bravery and loyalty radiating from your soul…Gryffindor, possibly? But I see here you have the intelligence of Ravenclaw and the goodness of Hufflepuff…this is a hard one…" There was a considerable pause. "What do you choose?" The hat stopped, and it took me a moment to realize he was asking me.
"Isn't that your job?" I ground out between clenched teeth, and winced as my head thumped again.
"Its up to you now." Dumbledore spoke, his eyes surprisingly intense. I stood taking the hat off my head and placing it on the desk in front of him, then returned to the stool. I took another deep breath, and closed my eyes, waiting for the usual flash of image to tell which direction I would ultimately end up choosing no matter what I wanted. I waited, and surprisingly, two images flashed behind my closed eyelids: one was Slytherin, and the other Gryffindor. I never got two. Something deep with in me stirred, something that was not entirely me, and seemed angered by the Gryffindor symbol that was still burned in my brain. It revolted and threw away the image, whispering in a familiar hissing tongue what it wanted me to do. The darkness of this voice seeped into my mind, enveloping the Gryffindor option with its smoky tendrils. And suddenly a new image flashed up, and played itself like a silent movie clip in my head. This was not from the dark voice; he was not controlling this as the scene sputtered in my mind. This image was coming from me. A girl, no older than seven, with dark hair and wild, frightening eyes stood before a towering man, dressed in black robes. He had a hand placed possessively on this little girls shoulder. The scenery around them was blurry, but I recognized the mans voice immediately, the slow hissing tongue. I shivered and tried to pull myself from the vision. The Image shimmered in my mind and disappeared. There was no doubt that the little girl in that illusion was me. A memory, so much a like to my terrible nightmares I shivered again. The voice spoke again within me, whispering what it wanted me to do. I knew what he wanted me to do, I knew exactly what, but I remained motionless. I was only vaguely aware of my actual surroundings. My mind was reeling with the vision I had just had. The memory. Why couldn't I remember that? I don't remember anything up until the moment I awoke in a public bathroom on the streets of London. That was only two months ago. The voice continued to speak, louder now, rising within my body like black smoke, wrapping itself around my bones and weaving itself through my mind, cutting off all thoughts except one. Slytherin. I knew that this thing inside me, was not me. It had been there since I can remember, but it was foreign. I could feel that it did not belong, like the way the immune systems can tell an infectious organism from the bodies own cells. And before this corrupt villainous thing could completely control me, I made my choice.
"Gryffindor!" I choked out, like my voice was being taken away from me, withdrawn. I sounded desperate and weak, as I fought back the wave of pain he within me was creating. He hissed menacingly, like the words I had spoken burned him, and I felt it shrink away from my mind, wrapping itself like a snake around the rest of my body desperate to remain in control over something.
"Are you positive?" Dumbledore's voice broke me out of my anguish, and I struggled to mask the pain, and control my expression. I opened my eyes and he looked surprisingly worried. I nodded, unable to trust my voice. He looked unsure about my decision, as I'm sure anyone could see the sinister creature thrashing inside my body, radiating its darkness through my navy blue eyes. I blinked and I could feel the foul mist shrink back even more, loosing control over me entirely. The pain lessened considerably, and I sighed in relief, feeling more exhausted than ever. The phantom that had been terrorizing me seemed to drain out of me, almost as if it were soaking into the carpet, but not before whispering some terrible promises for me in the future. This thing was not a thing at all, it was someone who was trying control me. His menacing voice rung in my ears, I will have you back, Kira. I will.
I knew that this stranger was gone, but only for now, he always came back, whenever I needed to make a crucial decision. He had just never been so strong before, but maybe it had never had to be strong before, maybe I was getting stronger too, strong enough to refuse, the man who invaded my body, the man who was in my dreams. And in my lost memories, the man I called master.