Author's Beginning Notes: Well, this is my first fanfiction on this site in the JL category. It's also my first story in the second-person. The second-person approach was inspired by another fanfiction called To Protect written by Merlin Missy here on ; that is a really well-written story, focusing on the Justice Lord Hawkgirl. Not to annoy any HG/GL shippers, but this story of mine contains an unconventional pairing, even if it is one-sided in this certain plot. It's also a one-shot, a vignette. Since this is my first work in the realm of JL Animated fanfiction, I'd appreciate any feedback from you guys. Thanks, and enjoy!
Queen of Hearts
You don't truly know where it began, but you have some idea. It started with Darkseid and Brainiac, with Superman's hate and Batman's stubbornness, but ultimately with Her watching the hawks glide across the screen with such a look of longing. Instantly, you recalled all the times you had looked upon Mars from behind the Watchtower's windows. You just couldn't keep your mouth shut then, could you? But it proved all right in the end; She seemed willing to talk to you, and you had listened intently. And then…and then you had to go and ruin the conversation with a melancholy contemplation, didn't you? Never mind that it was true. But She…"Maybe we should call ourselves the Just-Us League…" She brought you back, She centered you. Calmed you, actually made you smile. Alright, it was more of a smirk, but still…no one had ever had that effect on you, not in such a long time spanning hundreds of years.
Of course, you weren't in love with Her then, not even when Brainiac and Darkseid were gone, and you were bandaging Her wounds. But that was the start of your affection for Her. It was only meant to be friendship, a sibling relationship at the most, but never…never love. You shouldn't have allowed it to happen. Shouldn't have allowed Her to do that to you. You should've controlled yourself, but you just couldn't. Now it's too late. She's forever in your heart, right next to My'ria'h. And you know what happened to her. You couldn't protect her. What makes you think you could protect Shayera?… Shayera. Shayera Hol. Do you still remember the shock you felt when Hawkgirl told you Her real name? That Thangarian is normally mysterious about herself-not unlike you.
She had finally told you Her name in the Watchtower's training chamber, during one of your many sparring sessions. Of course, because of the surprise it gave you, She struck you hard in the stomach with ease, but it had been worth it. You had gained an understanding of what she felt about of you.... She trusted you, and considered you a friend. And you deciphered all that information just from Hawkgirl's permission to give Her name to you. And to know that…pleased you. Fortunately, you regained your focus, and the sparring session continued without anymore distractions.
Sparring. You haven't done that since the war with the Invaders. Sparring sessions were a necessity then; it had been important to keep your fighting skills sharp. But when the war ended, and you were left alone to guard the Invaders, sparring seemed pointless. Shayera reacquainted you with that lost activity after Her wounds had healed from the battle with Darkseid and Brainiac. Those were a key element in causing you to fall in love with Her, weren't they? It gave you two much quality time together....
It took a while for you to realize those sparring sessions of Shayera's was Her way to cheer you up. Whenever you were feeling your lowest, caught up in bittersweet memories or human prejudices, She would demand a fight with you. You would always comply, still feeling depressed, but those feelings quickly disappeared once you immersed yourself in the battle. Nothing seemed to matter in those sparring sessions, except the fight and Shayera. You noticed how your bodies seemed to become one with each other, brought together by the sweat, the exertion on the muscles, the occasional drops of blood. It was, oddly enough…pure bliss to you, and you began to understand Shayera's aggressive nature a bit more.
Always against you She would use her mace, to put Herself on even ground with your physical strength. But there were sessions in which each of you took the time to teach each other hand-to-hand combat techniques from your respective races. You now have a decent knowledge of Thanagarian Melee, as does She of Martian. Your lessons to each other extended out of combat, into learning each other's languages. You've even taught her a little of your religion, but She had only questioned about it after Solomon Grundy's death. The subject has never been broached by the pair of you since that time....
When Solomon had died, you were worried for Shayera; She had never looked so depressed, even when She had been reminiscing over Thanagar. It was then you realized the full extent of Her compassion. In private, She talked to you about Her grief; Shayera felt as if She lied to Solomon in his last moments, since She had reassured him that his soul was waiting for him, when in reality She did not believe it to be so. You told Shayera that She had given him peace, made him less fearful of death because of Her reassurance. And in a way, She was truthful; it was the truth to Solomon Grundy, who did believe. Shayera seemed to accept your answer, and slowly after that-after a full week of grieving-She returned to her old self. However, She continues to periodically visit Solomon's grave, always bringing purple irises with Her to leave behind. And every time, She has invited you to come along, and you have always complied. Those visits also contributed to your fall for Her.
But there was so much more than that. There was Her spirit, Her kindness, Her intelligence. Then there was also Her arrogance, Her temper, Her impulsiveness. But even that fails to describe your reasoning; then again, love is a difficult and complex concept.... You suppose that the most important explanation for your feelings for Shayera is the same as yours for My'ria'h; She completes you. You feel more at peace, you feel whole in Her presence. She keeps you focused, centered…"Maybe we should call ourselves the Just-Us League…" just like She did that first time. You do remember how surprised you were when you realized your love for Her, don't you? Of course you do; how could you not? You never imagined that you could feel that away about anyone ever again after My'ria'h died....
It had been while She was sleeping. Her mask was off, and She had been sleeping, recuperating from the other Lantern's attack. By then the Justice Lords had been defeated, and She finally brought to the Watchtower's infirmary for necessary medical attention. You treated Her yourself, while the rest of the League anxiously waited. After a few hours, it was deemed She would be fine, but rest was necessary for Her. However, if not for the earlier treatment at that alternate Arkham, Shayera may have been lost....
You knew you loved Her then. Keeping watch over Her as She slumbered, it hit you. You loved her. You. Loved. Her. To your credit, you weren't immediately frightened, but you weren't exactly overjoyed. Just…stunned. Numb with shock. But you were shaken out of that state when you heard Shayera moan; looking down at her, concern visible in your eyes, you saw She was having a nightmare. Her face was strained, and a steady stream of tears cascaded down, shining in the starlight from outside. You…lost absolute control of yourself then. All rational thought flew out the window. Pure emotion took over.
On pure instinct, you transformed into a serpent, the one spoken of most prominently in ancient Martian folklore. Craning your long, sensuous neck down, leaning over Shayera's face, you began to lick Her tears away gently, drinking them up, drinking in Her sorrow. The bittersweet taste intoxicated you; the sadness inside echoed your own, giving you solace, but Her tears held its own uniqueness: the mingled flavors of strawberries, pineapples, and spring rain, as well as the taste of Her flesh, so tender, her spirit glowing, emanating from it. It was essence of Shayera, and it was precious to your tongue that night. Thankfully, you had enough control to let it go no farther than drinking Her tears. And oddly enough, She did seem more calm when you had done that.
When you tried to enter Her mind, deciding on directly confronting Her nightmare-that was when you stopped and regained control of yourself. Again, you were reminded of Her mind's immunity to your telepathy, her barrier. You could not read Her mind. While that ended all chances of you accidentally hearing Her thoughts, thus forever protecting Her mind's privacy, it also provided problems: You wouldn't be able to reach Her when an emergency arose. That message truly struck home when Dr. Destiny appeared. When it had counted the most, you could not reach Shayera, even Lantern's ring couldn't penetrate Her mental shield. If not for Batman, She could've been lost then as well....
So many chances for Her to have died in the past, and still so many in the future. At times-in your most protective and irrational moments-you just want to lock Her up in the Watchtower, away from all danger. But you know that is impossible; She would never allow herself to be locked away like some bird in a cage, and you know that you could never go through it. But can you really be faulted for those moments of over-protectiveness? After what happened to My'ria'h? To your family? To your whole world? You said before that you could survive the loss of another family, but how true was that? Could you really? What about the loss of another love? In your heart, you know the truth....
Green Lantern and Hawkgirl. John Stewart and Shayera Hol. It was inevitable, you caught the signs early on, continued to observe them, even went so far as to play matchmaker for them, though most of the time with Her. You and Her would talk, and sometimes you playfully teased Shayera about Her feelings. She would get embarrassed, unable to hide her flushed cheeks, but never once did She lose Her temper with you. But those moments were rare; most of the time you genuinely helped Her sort out Her emotions, listening to Her, giving Her your own advice and experience on the matter of love. And tonight....
Earlier, you had rushed into the Watchtower, worried for Lantern's safety; you and Diana had been absent when the Joker and the Royal Flush Gang appeared in Las Vegas, busy with another jailbreak in Metropolis. When you and Diana heard, she asked you to go on ahead without her, saying she could handle the clean-up of the jailbreak's aftermath herself. You agreed, and headed toward the Watchtower. You had almost made it to the door when you halted, hearing Shayera's voice, as well as Lantern's; judging the content of their conversation, and the emotions behind it, you knew it was an extremely private moment for the couple, one that would probably lead to some intimate revelations. Yet, you stayed. Just like when you realized you loved Her, you lost control then as well. You just couldn't get yourself to move, could you? Not even to lower your density and phase through the floor.... No, all you could do was stare from behind the door, transfixed by the sight before you.
Seeing Shayera without Her mask was no surprise for you; after all, you lived with Her. In the Watchtower, Her own home, She didn't desire to wear the mask all the time, especially while She slept. And you would always every night check up on Her, receiving comfort in finding Her still in bed, still breathing, still alive.... Nonetheless, She looked the most beautiful tonight. Again, just like the night you realized you loved Her, She glowed, and not just Her flesh, but everything about Her; Her wings, Her hair, Her eyes, everything. She seemed to not only be glowing with Her own spirit, but with the light of the stars and moon outside the Watchtower as well.
And when they were about to kiss…you left then. That was one thing you did not wish to intrude upon, to tarnish. That kiss should only be between Shayera and the man She loves, Lantern. Do you feel depressed? Jealous? Angry? No, no you feel…happy? How strange. Well, its not really that odd, actually. You love Her after all, thus you desire her joy more than anything else. And She is happy now, the happiest She has been in a long time, you can tell for certain. As long as She is happy and alive, what could possibly upset you? …Still, there is that small, nagging part of you that desires more....
Shayera felt as if she could fly around Earth in 80 days. Undoubtedly, that inspiration was due to a recent novel she read, and also to the fact that she and John had just confessed their love to each other an hour ago. Even after that time, Shayera still felt exhilarated. It had been a long time since she felt this happy. It was as if the Thangarian were wearing rose-tinted shades, throwing the entire universe into a positive perspective, making her feel as if everything was right with the cosmos, that there was nothing wrong.... It was a comforting lie. Now more than ever did she understand what J'onn had told her when Solomon Grundy died....
The Thangarian began twirling her mace excitedly as she thought of her Martian friend; he was the one person she wanted to share the good news with the most. J'onn was the closest friend she had on Earth; in fact, the closest one she ever had. A best friend, that's the term, thought Shayera. She never lost her temper with him; J'onn was the only one who could never really inspire rage within her. In fact, he calmed her. And it was actually nice to be calm. Shayera felt so comfortable around J'onn, as if she could tell him anything; well, almost anything....
Sighing, the crimson-haired woman set down her mace, and picked up her mask; she didn't put it on, just ran a hand over it, feeling its texture as she pondered over the truth, her mission on Earth, her status as a spy and a soldier. Stupid Oath of Secrecy, thought Shayera as she furiously threw her mask across the room, slamming into the wall, a testament to her infamous short temper. Immediately, she looked at John; fortunately, the mask's crash against the wall hadn't woken him up. After gently stroking his cheek and breathing a sigh of relief, she stood up to retrieve her mask. But it wasn't on the floor anymore, it was in J'onn's hands.
"You really should learn to control your temper more," the Martian said softly as he returned the mask to its Thangarian owner. A bright smile was spread across Shayera's face, pleased to see her best friend here.
"Sure, whatever, nice to see you too J'onn, I'm doing fine," she replied teasingly, setting her mask down, right next to her mace. The Martian smirked, then quietly stood by Lantern's bed, peering down at him, analyzing his wounds.
"He'll be alright, but Batman says he'll have to stay in bed for a couple of weeks," responded Shayera, answering her friend's unspoken question. All he did was nod, then a comfortable silence followed. It didn't last long though.
"So…how was the kiss?" Shayera just stared at J'onn with wide, emerald eyes, uncomprehending. Then, comprehension struck, and she scowled at him, although her eyes were smiling.
"You caught us," she said simply, calmly. It did not escape her notice that if this was anyone else, she would've started screaming by now. But somehow, J'onn was immune. He always was.
"Not necessarily; I left just before you two kissed. I did not want to spy on that," replied the Martian, an apology for held in his tone of voice. Shayera waved him off, telling him it was fine. After all, who was she to complain, a genuine spy herself?
"You have more honor than me J'onn," said the Thangarian, half-joking, half-serious. "If I had been in your shoes, I would've watched the whole thing, kissing and all." He chuckled at that, then asked again about the kiss.
"It was…o.k., first of all, there really is no way to describe it, but I'll try to anyway. It was the greatest thing imaginable. It was just…it was like a puzzle, you know? A puzzle coming together. I felt whole, complete, and I knew John did too, and it was the most fantastic feeling; I've never felt happier. You understand, don't you," asked Shayera excitedly. But worry flashed across; what if she was bringing up memories of My'ria'h? Obviously, she was. Damn, I should've really considered J'onn's feelings, Shayera thought as she watched for her friend's reaction. To her relief, he didn't look hurt or sad at all. He was actually smiling in a warm manner, and the Thangarian felt herself glowing; she knew that her glow was just as strong as the one that emanated from her when John and her kissed....
"…Of course," replied J'onn. Shayera heard the love behind the words, but she assumed they were for his wife My'ria'h. It never crossed her mind that they were for her as well.
Fin
Author's Ending Notes: I hope you guys enjoyed that! If you noticed, there were noticeable references to the episodes Twilight, The Terror Beyond, Secret Society, Only a Dream, A Better World, and of course Wild Cards, as well as Starcrossed. As for why I did this pairing…well, J'onn and Hawkgirl are my favorites from the JL Animated Series. So, I obviously wondered what it would be like if they were together. I actually like the idea of them together; in fact, I plan to someday write an AU fanfiction were this couple does exist, instead of a one-sided, unrequited love. The second reason: This was a response to an unconventional pairing challenge. Third reason: I wanted to add something new to the realm of JL Animated fanfiction. Remember, any feedback would be much appreciated. Thanks!