Title: Flight 121
Author: erinm_4600
Characters, Pairing: OCs
Rating: G
Summary: Crossover with Snakes on a Plane and a mention of Lemony Snicket that couldn't be helped...
Warning: Written for hogwarts_elite's Hogsmeade, Term 11(?). Prompt was: FICTION CONTEST #2 - For this one, write the most awesomely bad crossover between Harry Potter and another fandom that you can possibly imagine. Since this is a Harry Potter community, your fic should be primarily about the Potterverse instead of the other fandom.
Disclaimer: The original characters belongs to JK Rowling and their respective actors. Montgomery Montgomery belongs to whoever wrote Series of Unfortunate Events. The original characters are mine.
Originally posted: August 16, 2006
Another day in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement had begun at the Ministry of Magic. Witches and wizards entered the office and, after setting down their satchels, removed their traveling cloaks and began to sift through the day's reports.
While the Department of International Magical Cooperation was up on Level Five, it was decided that smaller department of IMC/MLE should be located on the second floor. After all, it would be much easier to form a team, in case of an international magical emergency, from this location.
Sitting on a large table in the back corner of the room, was a fax machine - a Muggle communications device, combining the Owl Post and Floo Network. The antiquated machine rarely made a noise during the work day, but it must have gone off during the night, as there was a slip of paper sitting on the tray. One of the IMC/MLE team members picked up the slip of paper and gave it a glance before returning to his desk.
"Oy, what's the news?" asked a wizard, also delegated to the joint team. Sitting at this desk, the first wizard passed the page across the double desk and replied,
"Just a note from the MLE agent in America." Across the top of the page was the seal of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, or FBI, which was the Muggle equivalent to their own department.
"Official press release from the..." the second wizard read aloud, then skimmed the rest of the note. He lazily set the paper on his desk and leaned back in his chair. "So, make up some story about a murderer and a witness to offset the truth? Seems that those Americans are becoming more creative than our Reversal Squad." The two wizards shared a laugh and continued to read through the daily reports.
That evening, the front page of the Daily Prophet read:
NOTED HERPETOLOGIST'S MENAGARIE BREAKS CONTAINMENT
Montgomery Montgomery, noted Herpetologist and friend to the Ministry of Magic's Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, had quite a scare this past evening, when informed that his new collection of snakes broke loose during transport. The reptiles were being transported from a small village of wizards, living on a remote island in the Pacific Ocean, by way of airplane - a type of transportation Muggles use to travel over extended distances.
While the snakes were not dangerous, and actually very well house-broken, it is apparently quite uncommon for snakes to roam free on an airplane. Also, it is reported that Muggles have a tendency to react to most reptiles in a very negative way. Many of the snakes were killed by the Muggles before representatives from the Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures and the Accidental Magic Reversal Squad were able to Apparate in and take control of the chaos. Once the remaining reptiles were collected, and the memories of those on board the airplane successfully modified, Ministry officials cleared the scene. Two Ministry officials from America remained for the rest of the trip, in case any memory modifications did not hold.
The Muggle counterpart to the Ministry of Magic created a story involving flight troubles - apparently this is an occasional problem onboard an airplane - and a fight between a criminal and witness, which got out of hand within the small space. Many of the Muggles suffered minor injuries in the scuffle, and a few had reactions to the snake venom. "These snakes are not considered poisonous," stated Montgomery. "However, many Muggles suffer from a medical condition called 'allergies,' and some will react to the mild venom in particular breeds." Montgomery sent his condolences to the wizards who collected the snakes and will be postponing introducing the snakes to the Wizarding public until they have had a chance to recover from this ordeal.