Look at me, just starting new stories left and right. I should really learn how to finish one thing. *sighs*

This is actually a project I started long ago on my old fanfiction site (in case you recognize Amy the Pokemon Trainer and Ryan the Squirtle). Since then, I've revamped the story, written a lot more, and I think it's quite improved.

Basically this is how I see the first Pokemon game and how it happened. Stays true to canon in most ways, but it will diverge dramatically at times. Includes some of the Anime, including Ash, though Amy never really knew him, as he was a bit younger than her.

There were no pictures of Amy's father in the house.

If he existed, he was somewhere far away; and sometimes, Amy had a hard time even believing he existed at all. As silly as it might have been, she wondered if maybe she never had a dad, and it was always just her and mom, since the beginning. She asked her mother if that were true, and her only answer was a sad smile, and a quick glance away as tears sprung to her mother's eyes.

But it was okay, that she didn't have a father. She had Prof. Oak, who was as good as any dad. He was always around, visiting on weekends, staying for dinner, letting Amy tag along to see his lab, where all the Pokémon were. His grandson, Gary, was often there too, though Amy didn't like him as much. He was a little brat, always making faces and calling her names. She was eight the first time their little rivalry escalated into a scuffle in the road, and they had to be pulled apart by Mr. Daniel's Machoke.

"Why's he such a jerk?" Amy had asked her mother that night, after a somewhat gentle scolding, when she was being patched up. Her little scrapes and bruises didn't hurt so bad as the ache somewhere inside, that she felt whenever she looked at him, the only other kid her age in town, who hated her guts.

"I think he's jealous, sweetheart. He loves his grandpa quite a lot."

"Well, can't he share?" The girl scoffed.

Amy's mother glanced up. "Gary's lost both his parents sweetie. I think he's afraid of losing anyone else."

"… Oh."

She was a little kinder to him, then, though her kindness stretched only so far. There were only so many times she could take being told she smelled and was a stupid face.

On the whole, Amy had an idyllic childhood. Pallet Town was an easy-going, peaceful town, with quiet streets and long stretches of wilderness spread about. Amy spent her youth exploring those fields, dress and shoes muddied, knees covered in grass stains. Sometimes she was a Pokémon Professor, discovering new creatures at the water's edge; sometimes, a Master Trainer, taking on new challenges beneath the trees lining Pallet's roadsides.

Seasons turned, the days darkened, and Amy came to her fourteenth year. Once, she saw a glimpse of her mother, kneeling in front of her closet, hugging a shirt to her chest. She watched from the safety of the hall as she smelt it, as if revering it, before lifting it away. Amy caught sight of black fabric, with a red "R" on the front, before it was tucked away.

She spent more time with Prof. Oak at the labs, constantly asking questions of him about the Pokémon he cared for. More and more, he would offer to let her participate in his explorations, following after him on little trips to Viridian City, walking behind him in tall grass, looking for Pokémon. She was there while he tinkered with the first versions of the Pokedex. She was constantly underfoot and the delight of the lab aides.

Then came the day every child in Kanto anxiously awaited: her eighteenth birthday.

"Okay, listen up," Amy started, facing the mirror. "You have to pay very close attention because this is extremely, crucially important, and vital to my success as a Pokemon trainer."

Behind her, sitting on her bed, her mother rolled her eyes.

"Right, then." Nodding, Amy lifted her hands. "White hat or black hat?"

"You know, I'm pretty sure your future as a trainer really doesn't hang on how you look."

"Of course it does." The girl insisted, as she placed first one, then the other of the two hats on her head. "No one will take me seriously if I don't look the part!"

"And what part is that exactly?"

"The best trainer in the whole of Kanto." With a final nod, Amy put the white hat on her head, tossed the other side, and turned round. "So?" Lifting her arms, she smiled. "How do I look?"

A warm expression, lit up by a smile, came to her mother's face. "Wonderful, dear. Now you'd better hurry! I'm sure Prof. Oak's waiting for you."

"Right!" Nodding, Amy turned to the door, only to turn right back around. "Bag, where's my bag?" She found it on the bed, slipped it on, and went for the door again – then stopped midway there. "Shoes. Those are important."

"Tell me you aren't going to spend an hour choosing those!"

"Nope," She went to her closet, kneeling and taking hold of a simple pair of running shoes. "In this case, comfort beats style." Once she slipped them on, she took to the door, calling out a fond farewell as she barreled down the stairs. "Bye, mom! I'll stop by before I head out of town!"

"You'd better!" Her mother called, still sitting on the bed. She heard the front door slam shut, but remained where she was, waiting. Not a minute later, the door opened again, feet came pounding up the stairs, and Amy burst back into her room.

"Forgot my wallet!" She explained, picking it up off the corner of her desk before tucking it into her pocket.

"Put that into your bag before you lose it!" Mom called out, standing to follow her daughter to the door. The girl only laughed.

"Bye mom!"

It was quite the busy day; the day she finally came of age, and was allowed to start her Pokémon journey. It wasn't easy, to say the least. For all her dreaming of the day she'd finally leave Pallet Town, Amy found it was rather harder to do in reality. She would actually miss this place. It wasn't much, but it was home, and the thought of being gone for a year or more did bring a few tears to her eyes. But her excitement and jubilation overwhelmed her melancholy, and by the time Amy was standing in Prof. Oak's lab, about to pick her first Pokémon, she was thrilled.

"I know exactly who I'll pick!" Amy exclaimed as she hopped over to the table with the three Pokeballs. "I've thought about it a lot, and though it was really, really hard, I am absolutely certain now."

"Oh?" Prof. Oak cocked an eyebrow. "Well, then, who do you pick?"

"Squirtle!" She cheered, picking up the ball and clasping it to her chest. "Because Squirtle is absolutely the cutest one."

Sputtering laughter interrupted Amy. "Trust a girl to pick a Pokémon because it's cute." Gary scoffed. Approaching the table, he nabbed a ball. "Well, I pick this one because it's the strongest, like a good trainer should!"

"Today is a good day, so I won't punch you for that." Though she was truly itching to. "And it's not the strongest! It's just got a type advantage on me, because you're a vindictive ass –"

"Now, now!" Prof. Oak came between them, chuckling anxiously. "As Amy said, today is a good day! Let's not spoil it with any silly childhood rivalries."

His words had basically no effect; and within a minute, the teens were battling it out. At least it's with Pokemon this time, Prof. Oak thought to himself, rubbing his brow. He'd had enough of breaking up their squabbles to last a lifetime.

Some time away from home – and each other – will do them both good. He thought. And, when Amy won, a little smirk came to his lips. And a little lesson in humility might serve him good, too!

She was on the road within an hour; and by lunchtime, she was standing just at the city limits, looking out over the grassy fields with a bitter mix of awe and sadness. Her fists clenched at her side, she stood motionless on the road, just before Route 1, looking out at the vastness of it all with her heart pounding in her throat.

A trembling hand lifted to her belt, and she removed the Pokeball there. She tossed it; shining light revealed her new friend, whom she had christened Ryan. Gary had made fun of her for that, for nick-naming her Pokémon, but she couldn't understand why he didn't do it. Ryan wasn't just a Squirtle, he was her friend, (at least, she hoped he would be), and she couldn't just go around calling him 'Squirtle' all the time.

Looking at him, Amy felt more nerves fluttering in her chest.

"Hi," She said roughly, a weak grin on her face. Ryan cocked his head to the side, then waved. "See, here's the thing. I know I adopted you and I made all these big claims about becoming the world's greatest Pokémon trainer, but the thing is – I don't know that I can do it? And maybe I should just go home and rethink this whole –"

"Amy!"

Girl and Pokémon both spun to look at the speaker – Amy's mother, Hannah, who was running down the road towards them. "Amy!" The woman came up to her, huffing and puffing, and lightly smacked her shoulder. "You said you'd stop by before you left!"

"Oops." The girl winced. "I forgot."

Her mom smirked, as if she knew she had, and then reached into her pocket. "I wanted to give you this, before you left." She lifted her hand, and revealed a necklace.

Amy squinted at it. "What is it?" She took it from her mother's hand gently, then lifted it up to get a closer look. "Looks like one of those cheap pearls you find on the beach all time."

"Yes, I know, it's nothing much," Hannah admitted. "But your father gave it to me."

Amy's eyes snapped up. "Dad?"

Hannah nodded. "He hand-carved it, see?" She pointed to the little Pokeball hanging from the silver chain. "Gave it to me a few years before you were born, when we first started dating."

The young girl looked back to the little charm, and it danced in her vision as water blurred her eyes. "Why are you giving me this now?"

"Well," She shrugged. "I suppose I should have spoken to you of him sooner, but it always seemed so hard. And, well, there were reasons to wait. I kept telling myself you weren't ready. But then, I realized, you're an adult now, going on your own journey, and you deserve to know." Mother and daughter looked to one another, each with somber eyes, and Hannah gave another unsure shrug. "If you want, we could talk about him. You could leave in the morning?"

"No, I – I don't think I'll do this if I go back home now." The girl gave a nervous laugh. "How about – when I get back?" She asked. "When I'm a big, bad trainer, who's taken on the whole world, then we can talk about… him." After a moment's hesitation, her mother nodded.

A chirrup noise interrupted them both, and their eyes were drawn to the Pokémon standing before them. "Oh!" She'd almost forgotten about Ryan standing there so quietly. "Almost forgot. Mom, this is Ryan. Ryan, Mom."

His bright big eyes were looking steadily at the necklace. He gestured to it, then to his neck, as if he were putting it on. "You think I should wear it?" He nodded fervently. Amy glanced at her mother, and with some hesitation, placed it around her neck.

"Here, let me," Hannah stepped behind her, closing the clasp, then came round to look at her. "Perfect." She smiled. "Now you're ready. I know you'll be great, sweetheart."

Amy met her eyes, put as much confidence and mirth as she could into a bright grin, and tried to believe her mother's words for herself. "I'm certainly going to try." She said. Then she looked to Ryan. "You ready?" The Squirtle chirped happily, which Amy took for a yes. "Then, let's go. We can't hang around here all day."

They both began to walk; Amy took one last look back, at the sleepy little town she'd lived in all her life, at her mother's thin figure against the horizon. She waved to her, and watched her wave back, before she became a small dot in the distance. Then, with much more reluctance than she would readily admit, Amy turned away, looked to the north, and kept walking.

The first destination on her adventure was a little bit, well, boring.

There wasn't much to see, or do. In fact, other than running an errand for the PokeMart which had her darting all the way back to Pallet Town (where she pointedly avoided her mother), there was nothing to do in Viridian City. There was an empty, dilapidated gym, unused for what seemed like years, and that was all.

But then, she wasn't in much of a state of mind to do anything, after all. The shock of hearing her mother actually speak of her father for the first time in her life had her reeling. More than that, the fact that she could, if she so desired, actually know who he was, and maybe even where he was, that was… mind blowing. Something she'd hardly dreamt of.

Part of her desperately wanted to turn tail and go home, if only to know the truth. (Another part wanted to go home because this was the most terrifying thing she'd ever done in her life!) And yet, she really didn't want to know, not at all (and she didn't want to go home, not yet). The indecision and warring emotions tore at her heart until she was sitting on the grassy ground of the Viridian Forest, moving neither backward or forward, lamenting her fate.

"This is ridiculous!" Amy shouted at the sky, banging her head back against the tree she was leaning on. Ryan, sitting against her thigh, looked up when she spoke. "All I've ever wanted to be was a Pokemon trainer. And all I've ever wanted was to know who my dad is!" Sighing, she let her head hang forward, her hat slipping off onto her lap. "How can I choose between them? I mean, what if this is my only chance? What if she changes her mind? Or –" A sharp gasp ripped out of her throat. "What if the worst happens and mom dies while I'm away and I'll never see her again and I'll never hear the truth all because I was off on this stupid journey and –"

A splash of water across her face silenced the girl. Blinking, Amy glanced down at Ryan, nodded, and whispered a dry "Thank you." Ryan chirped. The Squirtle looked as cheerful as ever, despite his trainer's dilemma, and that brought a whole new bundle of worries to Amy's mind. "You must think I'm horrible. What bad luck for you, huh, that you got me for a trainer?" Ryan frowned at that, crossed his little arms and shook his head. "You don't?" He smiled, and gave her a thumbs up. "Well." Amy gave a wry chuckle. "At least I have your confidence."

A rustle in the grass drew both their attentions; Amy glanced up, and spied above the foliage a little horn. She moved to kneel, trying to get a better look, and caught sight of a Pokémon.

"Oh my gosh!" Amy squealed, reaching for her Pokedex. "Our first wild Pokémon!" Ryan seemed excited too, moving to sit in Amy's lap as she aimed the device. "Okay, who are you, buddy…" The little worm creature appeared on the screen, and was revealed to be, "Weedle. Aw, you're really cute."

Her voice caught its attention. When Amy glanced back up, the bug Pokemon was cowering in the grass, looking almost afraid of her. The fact that it was shocked her, and Amy stopped when she'd already been halfway reaching for a Pokeball. Beside her, Ryan moved off her lap, appearing to be preparing itself for battle, waiting for her orders…

But the Weedle just seemed so scared…

Sighing, Amy put the ball back, and sank against the tree. She took one of the cubes of food out of Ryan's dish, and reached out with it towards the Weedle. "You hungry, little guy?" She asked quietly. The fear turned to trepidation as the creature cocked its head. It reminded her very much of how Ryan had done the same when they first spoke, and fondness warmed her heart. "It's okay. We're not going to hurt you."

By the time they left Viridian Forest, Amy had a Weedle named Darling perched on her shoulder.

"I have a very important question for you," Amy told the nurse at the Pokemon Center. "I really need to know: is there any way to keep Pokemon from evolving?"

"Um, well," The nurse began, a bit taken aback. "I believe there are. Though most trainers want their Pokémon to evolve to become stronger."

"Why should these two ever evolve?" Amy scoffed, gesturing to Darling and Ryan. "They're both so damned cute."

The nurse gave her a look, and walked away.

The girl sighed, turning to her friends. "Well, guess I'll worry about that later." When she looked at them, they were both giving her looks of their own. "What? You are cute. Frickin' cute."

They left the center, stepping out into the midday sun shining down on Pewter City. It had been a long, frustrating trek through the forest, with a plethora of adolescent boys with nets constantly bugging her – ha, bugging her – to battle. But they had made it through, and gotten stronger, and the success had bolstered Amy's faltering confidence somewhat.

Maybe they could do this. And then, when all was said and done, she could go home, and have that conversation with her mother when she was ready.

"So, should we challenge the gym?" She asked, placing her hands on her hips. "Or we could take a break. Check out the museum?"

She was in the midst of thinking on this when a voice nearby caught her ear. "Mt. Moon? You're certain?" Amy turned; a man in a trench coat stood just outside the Pokémon Center, speaking fervently into a phone. "Team Rocket is there?"

It was – strange, but she didn't pay much attention to it. It wasn't her business. So, after taking a moment to talk it over with her team, the three of them went to the Pewter City Gym.

She'd had the badge for more than a day, and Amy could still hardly believe it. Looking down at the glimmering silver sitting in her palm, she grinned. Then she closed her hand around it and punched the sky. "We did it!" She cheered, before lifting her hand to help balance Darling, who'd slid from her shoulder somewhat at her sudden movement. "Sorry."

The three of them were heading towards the next town, walking along towards Mt. Moon. The battle for her first badge had been easier than she'd anticipated. But then, with Ryan having learned Water Gun, she'd had quite the advantage over Brock. Hopefully such advantages would continue to be useful as they traveled through the rock-Pokémon infested mountain.

Before entering the mountain, the three camped at its base, sharing a fire and a meal in the afternoon.

"This is – good," Amy said reluctantly, eying her travel meal she'd bought in Pewter City. "It almost tastes like food, even." Scowling, she set it aside, and let out a sigh as she leaned forward on her knees. "They always talk about the fun and the glory of adventuring. Somehow they forget to mention the sore muscles and bad food."

She glanced to Ryan and Darling; neither of them seemed upset about their meals. Both were digging in cheerfully. Chuckling, she smiled. "At least y'all are eating well." Then she stood and stretched. If she wasn't going to eat – and to be honest she wasn't sure she could stomach eating that thing that barely passed for a meal – she might as well do something. So she started away from camp, into the tall grass, just for something to do.

That's where she almost stepped on a little Nidoran. It repaid her in kind with a little jab of its tiny horn.

"Yeowch!" Amy fell back onto the ground, grabbing at her leg, glaring at the little creature. "Hey! What was that for?" She eyed her leg, where luckily the spine hadn't broken skin, it had only bruised her. "That could've been pretty bad." Still frowning, she looked up, and suddenly it hit her that she was looking at a Pokémon she hadn't seen before. "Oh!"

Snatching her Pokedex out of her pocket, she identified the little pink creature, who was still growling and glaring at her, hunched down on the ground. "Look, I'm sorry I almost stepped on you, okay? I'll make it up to you. You hungry?"

It still looked mighty suspicious, but at the mention of food, the Nidoran perked up considerably. With a little more cajoling, the creature followed her to camp, and in time, was eating out of a food bowl as happily as the rest.

"Forget Pokeballs," the girl said with a cheerful smile. "Food is the way to a Pokémon's heart. My heart too, now that I think of it." And with forlorn eyes she glanced at her own dinner, and gave a sad little sigh.

Mt. Moon wasn't too hard a challenge; there were plenty of trainers itching to fight, most of them easily taken down by water. But Henry, the Nidoran, showed his colors, too, and gave a few trainers a good fight. The trek itself was no fun, as the mountain was only more uncomfortable and rough than the terrain outside, and sleeping within it was no picnic. It was wet, and damp, and cold, and dark, and by the end of the first day's travel Amy was more than ready to see the sky again.

"Damn this horrid place!" She scowled and kicked a nearby rock. The rock growled at her. "Aie!" Jumping away, Amy watched in stunned horror as the rock unfurled into a Geodude. "Oops! Uh, sorry? I really have to stop running into Pokémon this way."

The Geodude scowled, and went on the offensive immediately. Amy clenched her fists, and glanced to Ryan. "Ready?" The Squirtle nodded, and leapt forward. "Water Gun!" In no time, the Geodude was blasted right in the face with a burst of water, and collapsed back onto the ground. Amy eyed it for a moment, regretful, and then glanced at her belt. For half a second she considered using one of the many unused Pokeballs she still had – but she didn't.

"Look, I'm sorry about that, it was an honest mistake!" She told the fainted creature. Wincing, she glanced at her friends, and nodded to the side, and they followed her as she moved away. She came up to a turn in the path, and came to a sudden halt there. Ryan bumped into her leg, and rubbing his nose, let out a whine. "Shush!" Amy glanced down at him, then pointed around the corner. All three Pokémon crawled up to its edge.

Down the path, lights had been strung from the ceiling, bright glaring fluorescents; and further down, she could see people filling up the cave, some with shovels, some with much larger mining equipment, and they were making quite a ruckus. The only reason she hadn't heard them before she saw them was because the Geodude had distracted her.

Amy wondered who could be mining Mt. Moon, and for what, when she caught sight of one of the miner's uniforms: black pants and shirt, with a big red "R". Her heart leapt into her throat just as her eyes widened.

"Hey, guys," She whispered, looking down at her friends. All three looked up to her as one.

"How do you feel about finding out what they're up to?"

The people in the black and red uniforms were not very forthcoming when asked about what they were doing. In fact, they were downright aggressive about it, each one challenging her to a match when she so much as asked who they were. Once they lost, most turned tail and ran, and Amy hardly got anything out of them. The further into the mountain they went, the more of those people they found, but still, Amy couldn't seem to discover anything about them.

"This is getting frustrating," The girl huffed, crossing her arms. She was nowhere near close to learning anything about them, and the path through Mt. Moon was coming to a close. She could even see the light of the other side, as the entrance to Cerulean City gaped open before them.

The light was suddenly cut in half by a figure stepping before it, then another. Amy knelt to the ground quickly, then clamored forward, her Pokémon following suit. They came close as they could without being seen, and Amy could make out another black uniform, and a scientist.

"We've only found two of them. There's nothing else left!"

"Just two? He's not going to be very happy about this…"

Amy watched the two speak, irritation and impatience boiling under her skin, before she gritted her teeth and stood, approaching them. "Who are you?" She demanded, coming to a halt a few feet away. Ryan, Henry, and Darling came to stand at her side. "And what are you doing here?"

"So, you're the one who's been interrupting our plans."

"I'm not trying to interrupt anything, I just want answers!"

"Stay out of the way kid. You're meddling in things you don't understand."

That was exactly it – she didn't understand. She didn't understand why she had to grow up with emptiness in her life and a shadow over her shoulder without as much as a name to cling to. She didn't understand why even asking where her father was, who he was, what happened to him, made her mother walk away fighting bitter tears. She didn't understand why her mother treasured an old black and red shirt but kept it hidden, tucked away, and she didn't understand who these people were, or what they were doing, or what they had to do with the man she'd never known.

But she was going to find out.

Neither trainer put up much of a fight. Maybe that was because Amy was right and truly pissed, and channeled her anger into the battle, and her team fed upon it and fought tenaciously. Maybe they were just piss-poor trainers. But by the end of it, the man in black had fled, and the scientist had tried to as well, but Amy and her team cornered him before he could try.

"Wait, wait!" Scrambling back on the ground frantically, the scientist held up his hands. "You don't have to do this! We can share!"

She had no idea what the man thought she was going to do, but she used it. "Share what? For god's sake, just tell me who you are."

"You really don't know?" The man chuckled. "You truly are a naïve kid." The girl bristled at that, and the man's fear escalated again. "We're Team Rocket! We were in Mt. Moon to dig for fossils of ancient Pokemon, but we only found two. Here, you – you can have one! Just let me go!"

Stunned, Amy watched as the man tossed a rock her way, and she just barely caught it in time. In the moment she took to grab it, the man leapt to his feet, and ran off. "Wait!" She almost ran after him, but thought better of it, sliding to a halt with a sigh. Her team was tired, and so was she, and she'd found out what she wanted to know, anyway.

Not that it gave her any answers. Now, she simply had more questions. Dark, lidded eyes glanced down at the rock in her hand, a dome shaped hunk of junk, in her opinion. She'd have traded the rock for more answers.

"Might as well keep it," She shrugged, tucking it into her bag. And with a quick look over her friends, to make sure they were alright, she kept on, and the four of them stepped out into the light shining down on Route 3.

The pearl necklace had a bright shine to it, beneath the dim lights of the Pokemon Center. The rooms were slowly going dark, as night descended, and the nurses prepared the Center and its Pokemon for bed. Amy was in her own bed, of sorts, covered by blankets and stretched out on a cot in the corner of the room. Henry and Darling were curled together between her legs, sound asleep, and Ryan had his own little pillow, on the floor beside them.

Laying back, Amy lifted the pearl higher, putting it between her eyes and the light, so that it sparkled. Until the lights were shut off, and the room went dark, the pearl turning back to a dim blue color.

Who had made this, she wondered. Was it done with love and care? But if it was, what kind of man could have such love in his heart, and then abandon the one he made it for? Or, had he abandoned them? Had he died? Was he even still alive?

Sighing heavily, Amy dropped the necklace and put her hand down, half-lidded eyes glaring at the ceiling. She should be sleeping, resting for the day ahead. Tomorrow they would be heading north, looking for Bill. So far she'd not made much progress on Prof. Oak's pokedex (a consequence of her apparent dislike of Pokeballs). Perhaps the Pokemaniac could help make up for her slack. Then, if they were up to it, they might try the gym. Or perhaps train some in the wilds around the city.

Amy needed rest, but it avoided her, despite the soreness sinking into her bones.

Why did it even matter who he was? Scowling, Amy turned her head to the side, glancing towards the window. He was gone. It was irrelevant. She had mom, and Prof. Oak, and Pallet Town, and her new Pokémon friends. She didn't need him, whoever he was.

She almost convinced herself those words were true, but for the gnawing emptiness trying to crawl its way out of her throat.