A/N: Okay, something like this was just begging to be written. This follows pretty immediately after the episode 3x05 "Night at the Lazarama," in which Juliet is enslaved by a mummy at the end of the episode. So far, in the show, her abduction has not been addressed. Here's my take on it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Wizards of Waverly Place, the Three Stooges, or ThunderCats. I also cannot claim any vast knowledge of Ancient Egypt; however, I did a little research so I was at least working with a real Pharaoh to use as the mummy. I cannot say for certain if he was a terrible person, but that's how I've made him here.
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Juliet Van Heusen was not a happy vampire. In fact, she was downright furious. Two weeks ago, at the urging of her boyfriend and in order to save her own life, she had allowed herself to be enslaved by a mummy.
Not just any mummy, oh no.
This mummy was one with delusions of grandeur. This mummy was one she'd known early in her unlife, when he'd still been alive way back in 885 BC. Her parents had been visiting Egypt again, masquerading as a pair of minor gods come up to earth, when she'd met him.
He had just been crowned Pharaoh Hedjkheperre Setepenre Takelot I. He'd had an inflated sense of self even then. He hadn't even been in control of both Upper and Lower Egypt, and without being recognized in both regions he wasn't a true sovereign. But oh! He strutted around as if Upper Egypt weren't pretending he didn't exist and his two brothers, Iuwelot and Smendes III both High Priests of Amun, weren't furious with him for taking the throne without first consulting them.
Still, he'd been Pharaoh in name and she'd been very young (hadn't even hit vampire puberty yet) and very lonely. She'd befriended Takelot and his young queen Kapes while her parents terrorized slaves and citizens alike. At first, she'd found him interesting. A mere man, pretending as though he were a god on earth? How dare he? She found him laughable and entertaining to listen to, so she'd stuck around. But shortly his manner had become insufferable.
Takelot had done things poorly as Pharaoh. He'd taken resources and squandered them in pursuit of his own pleasures. Not building monuments to his own glory or the glory of Egypt, like a proper Pharaoh should, but wasting the resources on entertainments of the flesh. Probably why his reign had been a very short thirteen years and why he'd been buried in a second-hand sarcophagus in his son's tomb; he'd never gotten around to building one of his own before dying of an aneurism from too much rich food and living.
She had tried to advise him but he thought her only a child, little realizing that even then she was centuries older than he and a great deal smarter, and he hadn't listened. Kapes had listened, for she had known the truth of Juliet's identity and trusted in the advice Juliet had to give. Juliet had shown Kapes just what she was when she had found the young queen wandering the halls of her palace pregnant and morose. It had been the beginning of the most important friendship in Juliet's unlife.
The young queen, a girl really at a mere fourteen years of age, had been forced to marry a man three and a half times her senior and sent alone (without so much as a friendly body-slave) to serve her new husband and had been extremely lonely, much as Juliet had been and they had quickly bonded. Juliet had told stories of her life and transformed herself to amuse Kapes; she had been rewarded with the friendship and near constant company of the queen.
When Juliet had seen how poorly Takelot ruled she had offered many suggestions for improvement, but he'd shunned her advice preferring to bar himself in his chambers with scrolls and concubines. Kapes, seeing her husband's indifference, had taken measures to mitigate the damage Takelot was doing and spent much of her time governing where he would not. It was due to Kapes' diligence and care that any reference to Takelot I survived to be found by future scholars. Had it been left to her son, Osorkon II born in the first year of Kapes' marriage (the only child she bore Takelot, for they never lay together again after consummating the marriage), Takelot would have been stricken from history altogether.
Juliet had no fondness for Takelot, but she had loved Kapes and had stayed in Egypt until Kapes had died, well into her son's reign as Pharaoh. Osorkon II had loved his mother dearly and built her a tomb near to his own. Naturally the tomb had been looted centuries later and only Kapes' remains had been left untouched, until some fool had decided to put them on display in the museum she and Justin had tracked the mummy, Takelot, to. Juliet had played it casual, but it infuriated her to see a woman she'd known and loved reduced to a mere curiosity for the masses, even knowing her friend's soul no longer resided within the body.
Takelot had been a fool and a slob as Pharaoh and he was the same now as a mummy.
She hadn't recognized him at first, what with him being dead and swathed in linen strips. But the moment she'd seen his sarcophagus, mere seconds after she'd been enslaved, she'd known who he was. Not very many Pharaoh's were buried in pre-used sarcophagi, and Juliet had helped Osorkon to find the one he re-inscribed for his useless father. As soon as she'd recognized his glyphs she'd become enraged. Never had she wished to meet this repugnant creature again. Why had it been him granted the powers of a magical mummy? Why couldn't it have been Kapes? She, at least, would have had the good sense not to enslave whoever happened upon her. She'd have gotten herself a disguise and found a way to live quietly. Juliet wouldn't have minded being enslaved by her; at least she'd have known Kapes would have taken care of her and not kept her a thoughtless drone. But Takelot, the idiot, was her new master and Juliet was well and truly ensnared.
The sentient part of her mind, trapped but fighting beneath Takelot's control, railed in fury at this fool's arrogance. Enslaving whomever he pleased, not realizing that he was setting off alarm bells all over the country and prompting missing persons reports to be filed from every town they'd visited, he had them traveling by night to make sure they weren't seen and that Juliet remained whole. He was amused to have a vampire minion completely at his beck and call. He often had her do things, destructive and violent things, just to test the limits of her abilities. She could only thank the grace of the gods that Takelot didn't recognize her; she liked to think that Kapes had a hand in keeping his memory of her dim, but she knew it was probably the facts that she'd grown up rather a lot and he'd been dead for a very long time that kept him from remembering the persistent little girl that had shouted abuses at him for being such a pathetic ruler. And as he had her slaughter another hapless homeless man she cursed his name a thousand times over in her thoughts.
She kept fighting the bonds he'd placed on her mind, stretching them to their limits, hoping they would break and she could turn her inner fury outward and destroy him. She knew it was only a matter of time. Even a mummy couldn't keep a vampire under wraps for long. Being an immortal she had the mental capacity to eventually throw off his mental tethers, all she needed was the will and some time. She had the will, even as he gave her body orders her mind was racing through the maze of his mind control looking for escape, and being undead she certainly had the time. But she didn't want to spend the decade or so she knew it would take to free herself as this creature's slave. Any other mummy, absolutely any other mummy, could have been her master and she'd have been willing to bide her time. But not with this callous beast. Takelot would cut a swath through the country if he could to set himself up as ruler, which would certainly expose the magical world and throw it into chaos, and all of it just so he could spend his unlife in leisure. She threw herself against her mental cage and howled her anger, though her body gave no sign, she would fight until she could fight no more.
They had stopped for the night, just before dawn broke, sheltering in an abandoned mine shaft complex. Takelot sent his minions out to fetch his cookie dough ice cream and then lay himself in his sarcophagus. Juliet didn't know where they were, and she didn't care, all she wanted was to free herself and take her revenge. Not vengeance just for herself though. Vengeance for each person Takelot had enslaved, for each person he'd had Juliet slaughter, for their families and friends, and for all the distress he's caused them all.
He slept while Juliet watched. Once more he'd forgotten, or ignored, his minions' need to rest. He'd already worked several mind-slaves into death from exhaustion, others from dehydration, and at least one from starvation. Juliet counted herself lucky that she was immortal; while she may be hungry she would not starve and her body could function much longer than a mortal's so she would not exhaust herself, although if he had her fan him with her wings while he walked, she may just try to die to spite him.
He slumbered the day away, only waking when his minions returned in reduced numbers bearing his frozen treat. Juliet could hear the humans' bellies grumbling, she could see the marks of exhaustion and dehydration on their bodies, they would die soon and he would have to collect more.
He must have noticed some of his minions were missing for he ordered them to march into town citing his need to have "a proper retinue befitting of his divine Pharaoh being."
Juliet would have gagged had she control over her body.
They had reached the town and Takelot had begun enslaving random pedestrians when a bright flash of purple light commanded all their attention and a human shape formed within it.
The human shape held a stick in its right hand, some cloth in its left, and wore large reflective goggles over its eyes. The sentient Juliet within her shell managed to look closer and discerned the human shape was a female. And not just any female, a wizard. One Juliet knew very well. Alex. Her soul sang as she recognized the young wizard, knowing she had come to help. Instinctively she searched for Justin beside or behind his sister and realized he wasn't there. It was just Alex. Maybe she had rejoiced prematurely.
"Hey, Rootentootin!" Alex shouted as the light faded, "I've got a bone to pick with you!" Three Stooges, Alex, really? Why was she not surprised? Slapstick was right up Alex's alley.
"Insolent wretch," Takelot thundered, "you dare defy me? Your Pharaoh?!"
Alex scoffed, "Psht! You don't rule me, Mumm-Ra. You've got a friend of mine. I want her back."
'Alex's bravado is going to get her killed one day,' Juliet thought, then prayed, 'just please, please don't let today be that day.'
"I am the Morning and the Evening Star! All you see before you belongs to me. You shall have nothing but a life of servitude as my slave!" Takelot bellowed at the slip of a girl daring to defy him.
He stalked towards her, eyes glowing ominously red. Juliet frantically tried to break his hold on her. If he got to Alex, she'd be done for. He'd enslave her and there would be no hope for her, wizard or no she just wouldn't have the mental power to fight him, she was still mortal. She couldn't let Alex fall to him, she'd never forgive herself. But even as she came to this conclusion, she realized she could never break free in time, and it was too late anyway, Takelot was staring directly at Alex…all was lost.
Only she wasn't turning into a mindless drone. Alex just smirked as the surface of her goggles caught and reflected the light right back into Takelot's eyes. He roared in pain and slapped his hands over his eyes and suddenly Juliet realized she had control over her body once more. Alex had somehow managed to break his hold!
Juliet wasted no time.
Her fangs popped out of their own volition and she launched herself towards her hated foe. Her nails grew into claws and an animalistic shriek tore from her throat. Then she was on him, rending and tearing, pulling him apart limb by desiccated limb until all that was left was shreds of filthy linen and dust.
When she was done, fighting to master her primal urges before she turned on the town and on the girl who'd saved her, she turned her eyes to Alex and couldn't help but ask with a grin, "ThunderCats, Alex?"
Alex blushed and growled, "You ever tell Justin any of his nerd-talk actually sank in and I'll never buy you jelly donuts again."
Juliet put her hands up in surrender, before walking to Alex and gripping her in a fierce hug. "Thank you for freeing me."
"No problem," Alex squeaked. Juliet could hug a lot harder than Harper, and Harper gave some pretty strong hugs. Even Frankie Stein hadn't hugged at this bone creaking level.
"How'd you do it, Alex?" Juliet finally released Alex so she could breathe and answer.
Alex cocked an eyebrow, "Do what?"
Juliet stared at her dumbly for a moment before waving her hands in exasperation, "Oh, I don't know. All of it! How'd you find me? How'd you get here? How'd you break the mind control?" She took a good look at Alex and noticed the cloth still in her left hand, "Is that my shirt?"
"Oh, that." Alex smirked when Juliet huffed. "Easy. I found you by using this," she waved Juliet's pink shirt under the vampire's nose, "to track you. I used a transport spell to get here. There were no spells to stop a mummy, because you know you kind of have to look at them to aim a spell at them and if you look you're enslaved, so I was just kinda winging it there at the end. But I figured goggles would keep his gaze off and it turned out they totally created a feedback loop in his power which broke his hold over all of you guys."
"…" Juliet just looked at Alex's smug face for a moment, then burst out, "You faced a deadly magical mummy, one of the most powerful beings of the undead, with no plan and a pair of goggles?! Are you insane?!"
"Hey, winging it is totally a plan for me!" Alex shouted back defensively. "And look," she flapped her hand at the small pile of linen behind Juliet, "it totally worked." Victorious Alex crossed her arms, canted her hip, and smirked at the vampire.
Juliet grabbed Alex's face suddenly and yanked her forward to kiss her, startling the young wizard. "You are absolutely crazy," she said when she broke the kiss, "and it's amazing."
Alex blushed darkly and said, "Right, well. Time to go home."
"What about all these others?"
"Right. I've got a spell for that…I think." Alex hooked Juliet's shirt over her shoulder then took the vampire's hand with her now free one. She started waving her wand as she chanted, "All those that the mummy took/against their will, with just one look/return them now to their places/well and whole and without traces/let their mortal memories be clean/of the mummy's taint and all it means!"
Suddenly Alex and Juliet were standing in the Russo's lair still holding hands.
"I guess it worked," Juliet said softly, feeling the warmth of Alex's hand.
Alex shot her an offended look, "Of course it worked. I'm Alex Russo, and I was on it!"
Juliet could only laugh.
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A/N: All right, my ducks, that's it for this one. Accolades? Objections? Let me know what you thought.