AN- Hello everyone! GameFreak and MuseLover here bringing you a bunch of drabbles that might not make much sense. :D

Seriously... Don't take some of these seriously.

Anyways... This first Drabble is gonna be a 4-shot and is called:

2 Men and a Chocobo.

This was inspired by dissidiaproject, they make videos on YouTube that are parodies of Final Fantasy:Dissidia Project (obviously). The genre of this will hopefully be funny and stupid.

Disclaimer: We definitely don't own Final Fantasy. Trust us.

Warning: Swearing.

Part 1: Unexpected Visitor.

"Boko, now you be good to these people." Bartz walked off, humming a bit before suddenly turning around to give Boko a stern look.

"And no raping!"

Boko gave a sad chirp and bowed his head in disappointment. Bartz continued to walk again, waving and saying "Tata!" before closing the door.

20 minutes earlier.

Bartz entered the apartment door and waltzed in like he owned the place with a baby blue grocery bag in hand. Stan looked up from his Ps2, having to pause in the middle of a fight with the final boss, Fepirothel. "Uh...how did you get in here?" He spotted the blue bag, "And what's that?" Bartz payed no mine to Stan's questions and threw the bag towards the couch.

Right were Squall was sitting and 'chilling' at.

Squall blinked and shook his head wondering if someone had a deathwish today. "What the hell!?" Squall was pretty pissed since he and his conscience were interrupted of their very serious discussion.

About the existence of unicorns.

He snatched the bag that sat on his lap and promptly dropped it to the floor, next to the trash. He sat back and crossed his arms against the back of his head, and continued to talk to his British inner voice, who'd been given the name Conner.

'I'm telling you, Squall. Unicorns ARE real!"

Squall facepalmed.

'Conner, I SWEAR to Cosmos, if you say that again, I WILL torture you with mental images.'

'Go ahead, lad-'

'Of Kuja.'

Conner was silent. Until...

'Thats it! If Kuja is real then unicorns MUST be real too!'

Stan and Bartz jumped a bit when Squall suddenly sat up, yelling, "Will you please! Shut. The. FUCK. UP!" They both stood there awkwardly before Stan sighed and shrugged, "Don't worry... This happens all the time." Bartz nodded, still looking warily at Squall (who was muttering now) before looking at Stan. (who started to chuckle weirdly) 'Maybe I should've left Boko at Cecil's.' Bartz shook his head, 'But he's having a family reunion... And he's the host!' Bartz mentally started to cry. Just then, a medium-sized Chocobo ran into the room, flapping his wings and chirping wildly. Bartz, hearing the chirps, turned towards the flailing Chocobo, bad mood suddenly lifted.

"Boko!"

Bartz ran towards Boko and hugged the bird as if he hadn't seen him in years. Stan and Squall stopped their chuckling and muttering and they both looked over at Bartz and the bird that toward above him by 2-inches.

The grocery bag started to make sense now.

"Uh... Bartz... What the hell is that bird doing here?" Squall asked, even though he probably knew the answer. Bartz grinned stupidly, "You guys are birdsitting!" Stan spoke up, his slight Australian accent trembling. "W..what do you mean? 'Birdsitting.'" Bartz grinned again, "You guys are gonna watch Boko today," Bartz threw his arms in the air, "Don't you feel special!" Boko flapped his wings and hopped on to Squalls lap, effectively smothering him. Bartz started walking away with a skip to his step. "Boko, now you be good to these people." Bartz walked off, humming a bit before suddenly turning around to give Boko a stern look.

"And no raping!"

Boko gave a sad chirp and bowed his head in disappointment. Bartz coninued to walk again waving and saying "Tata!" before closing the door.

"Get off of me!"

Squall pushed the Chocobo off his lap and greedily sucked in the air.