a/n: New story from me. It's kind of weirdly written but I wanted to be more in Katie's thoughts so everything in the Italics is her direct thought straight from her mind.


When you have about no self-confidence, you're terrified of almost everything, and you have serious commitment issues it's just generally not a good thing for you to be taking part in a war with like basically you're entire world. So then I'm sure you're wondering, because I know that I am; why in the world would I, Katherine Elizabeth Bell, possibly be prancing around Hogwarts castle while there is possibly the worst war in the history of history (which is quite a long history so you know) is taking place. Well person in my head its simple….I'm here because my long time boyfriend (of only two years but that's a long time for me) and my greatest friend of all time are around here risking their lives.

Oliver I'm not so worried about because he's terrified of death but he's just here to look like the hero and the super star quidditch player that will get all of the publicity when this is all over….god hoping that this ever does end. Now George on the other hand, that kid never knows when to shut up. Always saying too much and getting himself in bad positions these days. I suppose with his little brother being best friends with the protagonist of this war he has some reason to be supportive and run around with Fred basically trying to get themselves into trouble. His whole family is here. I love the Weasleys…my family are all at home hiding hoping that it will all be over soon and no one will ask them too many questions.

"AH!" I think someone just died next to me….

"Katie are you alright?" Alicia called back to me.

"Is…is….is that person dead?" I hate death, I hate dead people, I hate dying, I hate anything that starts with the letter d and has to do with the end of someone's life. I mean I don't even know that person…what they did, who they were, if they had a family, and I'm just supposed to walk right on by their dead carcass like it's nothing new?!

"Yeah Kates I don't know if you noticed but we are in a war right now…so commonly there are a lot of those around here" She screamed flailing her arms about trying to get me to keep running.

"I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this…." I'm officially freaking out right now….god damn my caring for people….I swear if George gets himself killed in this I'm going to kill him……or something….I'll mess up his funeral! HA!

"KATIE PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!" She screamed and grabbed my arm to get me to run at her pace. Damn she's basically just dragging me in the wind right now…

"I can't do this I can't I can't I just can't!" I tend to freak out in times like these.

"Alicia!"

"AH!" I'M GONNA DIE!

"KATES RELAX IT'S JUST ME!" Lee Jordan popped out of nowhere….I almost hit him with a curse.

"Well don't pop out on people like that in the middle of a battle!"

"I didn't pop out of anywhere I fully called Alicia's name ahead of time hoping not to scare either of you" Yeah well it didn't work.

"Katie is basically having a break down right now…I don't know why you guys let her come I knew she would be like this" I am not breaking down….okay so I am but I can still help I think!

"Because George figures she'd be better here where she knows what's going on verse being at home having a worse melt down because she thinks we're all dead" I would not do that……oh wait yeah I would.

"I guess that's true but she's going to get us both killed if she is out in the battling area" Crap I knew I should have paid attention in defense against the dark arts…or at least during the whole DA thing. I really need to work on that whole paying attention thing. OH CRAP IS THAT A DEATH EATER?!

"KATIE COME ON!!!" SHIT ALICIA IS ALREADY RUNNING!

OH SHIT!

EW did I really just trip over a dead person? Oh yeah I'm running.

"You really need to pay more attention to your surroundings!" Alicia yelled at me once we got into the great hall. It's weird how different this castle is now that it's like a giant battleground.

"How was I to know that there was a death eater coming and to look out for dead people while I'm running trying not to become one?!" It sounded smarter in my head.

"KATIE! We are in a war! God you're going to get yourself killed here!" I told her I couldn't do this.

"I'm sorry I'm not good at these kinds of things anymore you know that!" It's sad how I used to be brave. I mean I was in Gryffindor so I was brave…but things change and I'm anything but these days. I wish sometime I that I still was but it just doesn't work anymore.

"Kates….I'm sorry I'm just freaking out too." Alicia said giving me a hug.

"Maybe you two should stay in here and hide out for a bit until it's necessary for you to fight again….to be safe" Lee said.

"What so just sit in here and blast anyone who comes close?" that doesn't seem very fun.

"Katie I think right now that would be the best thing. I'll trying to get back in here every once in awhile to give you updates" He said and ran out the door.

"Well so now what?" Alicia half smiled.

"This sucks 'lic"

"Yeah I know but I need to stay with you and we are both way too stress to have our and other peoples lives depend on us right now so maybe Lee is right and this will be best" She said swinging her arms around a bit.

"Yeah…..I guess. I wish I knew where my boys where though" Stupid boys going out and having to be all brave and leaving me behind to freak out and wonder if they are even still alive.

"Oh I know…I wish I knew where everyone was. I keep trying so hard not to look at all the dead bodies in case I'll see someone that I won't want to see ya know….so far it's only been a few people I recognize and then a bunch of people I didn't even really know….I saw Claire I think….made me feel kind of bad about all the bad things we said about her." Claire was this girl in Hufflepuff, Alicia's year, that annoyed the crap out of us so we both despised and always said mean things…it's weird to think how many times we would say that she needs to just die or something like that….it's awkward now that she really is.

"That's weird to think about" I said…it's weird to be able and stop and just think about what's going on.

"Hey wanna go sit in the big chairs?" She smiled at me.

"Alicia Lynnette we are at a time of war and the only thing you can think about is sitting in the big chairs?!" I'm actually laughing right now…leave it to Alicia to have it so that I'm standing with blast and screams all around me a few dead bodies in view and she can actually make me laugh.

"Well we have nothing better to do, they'd be big enough to hide behind if anyone came in, and we have never and will never again have a chance to do that" She smiled

"Mkay" I just giggled….and I'm running and laughing…..we are the weirdest people in the world.

"I think this is more terrifying then being out there fighting"

"What is?"

"Just sitting here listening to people screaming"

"Yeah I think it's getting bad that I'm getting used to it."

"Do you think it will ever be over?"

"God I hope so…Harry is trying really hard though so as long as he is alive we are free to go I think"

"Yeah I guess…it's weird ya know…to think like what happens if he loose…will what's-his-face kill all of us or what?"

"Yeah I don't know I haven't even thought about that"

"I guess its better that way"

"Shit I think I here someone coming"

Damn these really are big chairs.

"FRED! PERCY!" Alicia squealed as she was peering over the top of her chair.

"Oh my god it's good to see you guys!" Where's the other one, George never goes anywhere without Fred or Me. Oh shit oh shit oh shit….

"What are you two doing in here?" Fred asked.

"Kates was freaking out and I was freaking out so Lee told us that it would be safer for everyone if we just hide out here" Alicia explained

"Where's George?!" Who cares why we are here why isn't George here.

"He went with Dad somewhere I'm sure he's fine though" Fred said giving me a comforting look. He's always been so kind to me. I mean I am his twin's best friend, next to him, so I'm assuming he knows everything George knows about me and always seems to be sympathetic for me…knowing that I easily freak out.

"Okay…"I said sounding a bit too unsure.

"It will be okay Kates don't worry" He said giving me a half hug.

"Alright Fred we need to get going" Percy said.

"Yeah…. right" Fred said after looking me straight in the eyes.

"BE CAREFUL YOU TWO!" I yelled as they left the great hall.

"Ya wanna just stay back here?" Alicia asked

"Yeah we got to sit in the big chairs long enough" I'm leaving that happier place that I was in earlier.

"Shit someone else is coming" Alicia said.

"Girls! Girls where are you?!" Lee screamed.

"Back here Lee! We were hiding because we didn't know who you were" Alicia explained.

"Oh…well good." He smiled.

"Did you see George?!" I asked him.

"Yeah, upstairs, and he's okay and said that he would come down here and try to get to talk to you as soon as he could." He explained.

"Shit gotta run though I'll come back in a bit" He said and ran out the door near were we could see someone fighting.

"Oliver's okay too" He yelled from the doorway with a chuckle. Why that's chuckle worthy I'll never know….

Suddenly four people ran into the room blasting spells all over the place. I couldn't see who they were being that I was playing dead and hiding and it was dark except for the flashes of spells. The room lit up green, there was a scream, and then a yell, and then three people left the room.

"Kates…Kates…did we just hear someone die?" Alicia asked me.

"I think so…." I said and reached out to hug her.

"I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this…" I was whispering to myself.

"Katie not the time" Alicia said. I have this weird thing when I'm freaking out lately were I say can't a lot. My mom thinks that I some what believe that if I accept that I can't do something it will magically change and I won't have to. So this leaves me saying can't over and over and over again hoping that things will change…is only a little true…because I don't do it on purpose.

"Sorry" Maybe if I close my eyes it will be better.

I just lay there for god only knows how long with my eyes closed not paying attention to any of the people who were running in and out of the great hall. I think I heard Alicia crying a few times. I tried to comfort her by rubbing her back but it wasn't working very well. I suck at comforting people.

Suddenly in the mix of the screams there was this loud voice, Voldermort's I guess but I don't really know. We heard it earlier and it was back now. Basically telling the death eaters to stop and Harry to give himself up. I didn't know how likely it would be for him to do that but I was hopeful that it was over.

"It's over…just like that?" Alicia asked me as we were standing up.

"For now at least." I said and sighed. People were gathering in the hall to count the dead and see who is still alive. This was indeed an awkward event but one that had to come eventually.

I spotted red and hair and naturally went right towards it.

"Kates!" I heard Oliver's voice from the crowds of crying people.

"Oliver!" Thank god he is okay!

"Okay so I just wanted to let you know that I was okay and now I'm going to go help bring some of the bodies down here" Ew I would never be able to pick up anyone's dead and bleeding bodies…but by the look of him blood is not a problem. Oh gross and I hugged him! Well at least I'm fine with blood….as long as those bleeding aren't like dying or dead.

"Oh shit!" Alicia said clapping her hand to her mouth. I have no desirer what so ever to see what it is that she is gasping about but I know I have to eventually.

The Weasleys are all standing around crying…first sign bad…..I'm too far away. WHY CAN"T MY LEGS GO FASTER! I see Molly, oh god she's bawling…., Arthur is there holding up Molly, Ginny, Bill, Charlie, and Percy….oh god oh god oh god where are the other two!?!?!?!?!?!

My legs stopped moving as I came upon the sight of a lifeless Fred lying in the mix of the group.

"Fred…." I said quietly

"It's Fred what's wrong is he okay?!" Alicia was asking frantically. She's too short to see over the people and I'm blocking her because I can't move and now I can't see because this blurry crap just took over my eyes.

"Oh god Kates can you see what happened" Alicia now basically trampling me.

"Katherine!" Molly sobbed out to me.

I can't believe this it can't be true…where is George?!? Molly reached out to hug me now both of us bawling and I looked down at Fred lying completely lifeless except he still had that slight smile and joy in his eye that made him one of the twins that I love so much.

"George?" I finally got out in between sobs.

"He doesn't know yet" Arthur told me while patting me and Molly on the shoulders.

"Where is he?" I can't bear thinking what this will be like for him.

"There" Charlie pointed to the beginning of the crowd in the room as George stumbled in with a smile on his face not having any idea of what he was about to find out. He spotted his family and started over shortly realizing that something horrible happened as all of his us had our bawling eyes on him as he crossed the room.

He began running and I could tell when he saw. He stopped and all of the happiness and joy that has ALWAYS been on George's face left and looked like it would never come back again.

He ran to his brother's side and stared into his lifeless eyes, George's now seeming deader then Fred's.

"He's….he's…." George kept saying unable to say the next word that could quite possibly make it official that half of his life was now dead. I can't even imagine…it feels like one fourth of my life is dead just because half of my life is George…

I knelt down next to him, tears on the edges of his eyes.

"Kates…...is he really gone?" He asked me quietly while the rest of his family members weren't paying attention anymore.

This kills me. I might as well be dead. I think it would hurt less if I was sitting here next to both of their bodies then seeing just George left here alone to suffer. His whole life was with Fred. From birth on there was never a moment he was without his brother by his side. And now never again will he be there. Ever….for the rest of George's life he will not have Fred. These things all going threw my mind as I knew they are going threw his and all I can do is stare at him and cry. I'm the worst best friend ever…….

George and I sat there staring at Fred for most of the commotion. When Voldermort said that Harry was dead I think we were both hoping at that moment that he would just kill us. George never spoke. He just stared at me or the body. When the fight broke out again I had no idea what George would do. For awhile he just sat there listening to the fighting around us and I just sat there staring at him waiting for his next move. Then suddenly he let out at deep terrifying scream stood up and ran out the door. I ran after him to make sure he wouldn't do anything stupid.

"Perce who did it?!" George screamed to his brother.

"What?" Percy yelled.

"Who killed him" George yelled with more rage then I ever thought possible for a Weasley.

"George come with me!" Lee yelled and George took off running with me still running faster then I ever have before in my life behind him.

George was on a rampage blasting over any death eater in site as he ran. A death eater was running at George and Lee that they didn't see him and I blasted him with more power then I ever have before in my life. Lee froze and looked at me astonished that I actually still can use my wand. George kept running and I ran after him.

I blasted down at least seven more after that just because I saw them. At one point George and I were dueling with three of them and Lee had one of his own. George and I got all of ours down and Lee's.

"Kates where was this earlier" Lee asked. I just glared at him. I looked at George and he was panting with more fury in his eyes then I've ever seen in anyone's before. It scared me to see him like that but I completely agreed with his fury as we ran around together. Lee had to calm us down a bit because he was afraid we were getting too carried away.

Molly was dueling Bellatrix with what until this point I thought was impossible but she actually had a more raging look about her then George and I combined. I wanted so badly to help her but she was screaming at everyone to back off. Bellatrix fell to the floor and her life left her. Molly smiled a terrifying victorious smile and George smiled one better.

There was some commotion and Harry was back. He put up some spell and everyone stopped fighting to watch him and Voldermort duel. George had no interest in who won anymore.

He ran back to Fred's body and I followed.

"Fred…" He said as he collapsed to the ground next to the body and began to cry. His fury and rage now completely gone and nothing was left but a mass amount of tears.

I walked over and sat down next to him.

"He can't be gone Kate…he just can't….he's going to wake up! It's just a prank! Fred this is fantastic I wish I thought of it but you can wake up now!" George was screaming and hugging his brother. This is more painful to watch then someone shooting puppies.

"George…" I said weakly. He looked up at me with all of the blood and grime now separated into three parts on his face by the tears. At that moment he leapt up and hugged me so hard I couldn't even breathe…..