He drives me mad.
Why does he hate me so? He has no real reason.
Yes, yes, I killed Euphemia. I admit that, and I feel awful about it, of course I do! She was my sister, for God's sake! I knew her much better than he did! And still he sees himself as the victim in all of this.
How pathetic.
I could apologize to him, I guess, but he's just so stubborn! He wouldn't accept an apology, I'm sure!
I don't particularly mind being nothing more than the evil, mysterious leader of a group of terrorists, but... I kind of liked it when I was Suzaku's friend as well. Perhaps more. God knows I wanted to be. Not that he ever knew.
The ignorant jerk.
I mean, if it were me, I would have figured it out right away! How useless can a person get? So, that's how I know that he felt – and feels – nothing for me. I would've noticed.
Sometimes I wonder if he did know after all, and just didn't say anything, out of respect or whatever. That would be even more foolish.
I really can't believe him. I'm not a bad guy, you know; he has his goals, and I've got mine. His are very different from mine. I am fine with that; he, however, is obviously not. Oh, yes, right, I wanted my best friend since childhood to survive, so I used my Geass on him. How very selfish of me. I should be locked up.
That's real loyalty, wouldn't you say? Finding out your best friend is also your worst enemy, and still wanting him to live on. That's the kind of loyal and honest person I am. And what about him? Is he loyal? No. No, he runs off with the first little princess he can find, and she takes my place beside him in the flower fields of happiness. Stupid, beautiful Euphemia; even in death she gets all the attention. I'm not bad looking, no, I've had too many (not so) secret admirers to think that, but apparently that isn't enough for him. No, to suit Mister Kururugi's tastes, you also need pink hair, a high-pitched voice, and a conscience clean enough to put any given nun to shame. In other words: be boring as hell.
Yes, I mean, I'm clearly the more interesting choice. Just imagine the conversations at dinner!
"Darling, how was your day?"
"Just lovely, honey! I led a few hundred terrorists into battle, shot three nobles, and bought pizza for an immortal witch! What about you?"
But, to be perfectly honest, I can see why he doesn't want me.
I don't even know if I'm human anymore.
Surely there's a limit to how much blood you can soak your hands in before you cease to be a man and turn into a demon. Surely it cannot be healthy to no longer be disgusted by the sight of thirty people shooting themselves simply because you told them to.
There are so many people I should apologize to, but cannot. Euphemia, for example. Shirley. Rolo. Suzaku is the one person I still have the opportunity to talk to – but the idiot won't let me!
Fine, whatever. He can do as he pleases. It would just be nice to have him back.
I'm clearly going to hell.
I had just hoped to go to hell without my beloved's hate upon my shoulders.