So, it's been SO long since I posted here that I forgot how the document manager worked. Maybe it's different now. I'm not sure.
Anyway, those of you that keep track of me know that I'm retired from the SVM fic writing world. I made the decision when I hit 29 that I needed to start moving on my plan to publish a book by the time I was 30, and I've spent the last year dedicated to that task, and I have to say, once I pushed myself into it, I knew it was the right decision. Not to say I don't miss Eric and Sookie from time to time, but honestly, the source material hasn't been as inspirational as it once was (I didn't read the last book), and I found myself pretty passionately invested in my own characters, so much in fact that I've written two and a half full-length novels, the first of which I published today.
This community has been extremely important to me, not only in the development of me as a writer, but also me as a person over the past 5 years. I've made some amazing friends, rekindled my love of writing (which I'd stopped doing in my teens), and you've given me the confidence to pursue my own stories (see, reviews do matter! I'm not sure I would have gotten past my first chapter without them).
I wanted to let you all know that I'd published a book, in the hopes that even if you don't buy it or have any interest in reading it, that you'll share it with your friends. Word of mouth is crucial to my success, and I know you guys are great at spreading the word! I know a lot of you have enjoyed my writing over the years, and even if it's not fic, it's still me, and I think and hope you'll like it.
If you can't afford to buy it, and would like to read it, please drop me a PM and we'll work something out. I didn't write well over a million words of fic for money. I genuinely love the community that come with writing online, and I look forward to building a new one (hopefully with some familiar names) with this new project.
Anyway, I've created links on my profile to my author blog, my Goodreads and Facebook author pages, and the link to purchase on Amazon and Smashwords, who distribute to B&N, iBooks, and Kobo.
If you've read through this author's note and you're still reading, all is not lost and this isn't just the longest author note in history. I thought the best way to introduce my new book to you was through fic. I may not have read Dead Ever After, but I was thoroughly spoiled, and here's my ending, with a little tease for Campbell.
Ten years after Dead Ever After...
"Do you think she can fix it?" Eric whispered, peering out from the dusty cubby in the dim morning light. "We've made a real mess of things, Lover."
"I don't know," Sookie said wistfully, remembering how simple things had been before, when he'd forgotten who he was and all his obligations. "If anyone can, it's her."
He looked up at her, his impossibly blue eyes searching her face, the slightest hint of insecurity behind them. "I'll…see you at first dark."
"I'll be here," she murmured, unable to resist stroking his perfect cheekbones before closing the door and bolting it.
It wasn't until a few minutes before dawn when Eric started growing lethargic that she'd remembered Desmond Cataliades passing on her card. It was a long shot, she knew, but it was all they had. Sookie wasn't sure what to expect from the fixer. She'd heard stories about her; a mythical figure, that, with a few jots in her notebook could reframe almost anything in a completely different light. Eric hiding out at her house was stupid. They both knew it. A decade had passed since they'd last been in any sort of close proximity, but when she'd opened the door and saw him standing there, sopping wet from the rain and beautiful as always, there was no way she couldn't invite him in, and it wasn't just because of her unwavering southern hospitality.
The spell Eric had commissioned froze everything for twenty-four hours. It wasn't long enough to fix anything, but he seemed hellbound on coming up with something as he paced her back porch; imagining a corner of the earth where they could hide away, some way they could become someone else. Sookie found it flattering, having someone so hellbent on them being together that she hadn't even stopped to think of why until after she'd tucked him in.
She wasn't sure she'd ever know what had triggered Eric's leaving Freyda and seeking such drastic measures. Maybe it had been the distance she forced between he and Pam. Perhaps the constraints she'd put on his freedom. Like her, Eric wasn't terribly complicated when you broke it down, and being forced into anything was pretty high on Sookie's list of things that didn't work too well for her. She doubted Freyda was as bad as Appius had been, but a master was a master under whatever title you wanted to throw on it. Maker, wife.
Maybe he just wanted a partner. They'd been close to that for a time, with her telepathy evening the playing field the tiniest bit. Probably as close as he'd been to anyone. After a thousand years, he was pretty much on his own when it came to his life experiences and skill set.
It wasn't that Sookie had spent the past decade pining for Eric; quite the opposite. She'd married Sam Merlotte, ignoring the gnawing in her gut that told her they were better off as friends for a good five years before she was diagnosed with a stomach ulcer. It had been painful, their split. He couldn't understand why she'd throw away something perfectly acceptable, respectable, even, with no reason other than it didn't feel right.
The problem was always that she had something to compare it to. She'd know true passion, and settling for Sam was like eating Jason's steak when you'd had filet mignon. Even with Bill, years earlier, with all the betrayal and the fighting, she'd had that fire. Maybe it wasn't sustainable, at least not with Bill, but it was better than looking forward to a life of twin beds and sex with the lights out, combined with dull conversation, the constant smell of wet dog, and bad cooking.
She'd rarely allowed herself to think of Eric. He'd broken her heart, in a fucked-up, round-about way. A way she'd never imagined being rational or logical, or in keeping with his character.
The twilight slowly turned into a bright, clear morning, and Sookie found herself pacing on the front porch. She knew, at least with the dawn, that there was no way Freyda would come kill her, because she knew she'd want to do it personally if she thought for a minute she'd stolen her husband. If the spell held, which she optimistically presumed it would, they had a good eighteen hours before anyone noticed Eric was gone.
She wasn't sure why she'd let him in. Once he was there though, in her house, it was like he'd always belonged there. Sookie had no idea what their relationship would have brought as she'd aged, and it had terrified her for most of her twenties, even imagining it. She'd had nightmares about Eric falling in love with someone more beautiful, someone smarter, someone less complicated, but if she'd stopped, even for a minute to really think about the man behind the bravado and good looks, she knew that wouldn't have been the case. Maybe their relationship would have evolved. Maybe it wouldn't have been traditional. Maybe they would have come to their natural end at some point, but with him there, in her house, she knew one thing for certain.
He would have opened the door for her too.
It was around ten in the morning when a shiny blue new generation VW Beetle crunched up her driveway. Sookie rose from the swing on her porch and narrowed her eyes, eager to get a look at the only person on the planet that might have had a shot in hell to put things to right.
She wasn't what Sookie expected; not that most magical creatures were. The fixer had long, dark hair and wore blue jeans, topped with a bright yellow drapey shirt that drew attention to her tanned skin and curvy figure. Her eyes were a vibrant, almost impossible shade of blue, and if Sookie had to guess, she looked about thirty in human years.
"You look just like your gran!" she called out cheerfully, waving from the driveway. "I'm the Fixer."
Sookie let out a sigh of relief and headed down to meet her, surprised when the woman embraced her tightly. "Sookie Stackhouse. What should I call you?"
The fixer looked at her sheepishly. "The Fixer. Your mouth is incapable of making the sounds required to pronounce anything close to my real name. Call me Fix, if you want to call me something."
"Fix," she said with a nod. "Thanks…for coming. I know you said we'd figure out payment, but I don't—"
"I won't require traditional payment. We'll discuss it later." She gestured towards the house. "Now. Tell me about your problem."
Sookie blathered on for the better part of three hours, starting at the very beginning. She made sure to mention how out of character Eric had been acting before they'd finally broken up, and how she knew the old Eric, her Eric would never have begrudged her for saving Sam's life, a decision she still didn't regret. She told her how lonely she'd been, and that he'd left a huge vampire viking shaped hole in her heart for the past decade, and really, before that even.
"So you really love him."
She nodded. "I wish I'd had the chance to love him more, and with less complications."
"And what does he wish?"
"He told me he wishes we had a second chance, away from all the politics."
The fixer nodded thoughtfully. "These aren't unreasonable things."
"They are in my life," Sookie drawled. "Every minute seems more complicated than the last when the two of us are involved."
"Yet you still choose to be involved with him?" Fix asked curiously. "I mean, isn't there an easier way?"
Sookie sighed loudly. "I mean, maybe, but I've tried, and I was pretty sure I was over him, and then he showed up here a decade later, and I'm letting him in, and tucking him for the day in a hole that hasn't seen a vampire in a decade."
Fix snorted. "That's what she said."
Gaping, Sookie took in the fixer, and for the first time, doubted her abilities. She was too goofy to be so omnipresent. "Are you sure you take care of this?"
"I took care of Stalin, didn't I?" She raised her eyebrows. "And Hannibal?"
"I…don't know," Sookie stammered. "Can…would you like some sweet tea?"
"I'd like mine with no sweet," she said dryly. "Honestly, I don't know how you people drink that."
Sookie wasn't sure how to make not sweet tea, but she gave it a shot, and when she presented Fix with her mug, she seemed pleased.
"How…does this work?" Sookie asked, concerned about offending her if she sounded too skeptical. "I mean, what—"
"Once I start writing, what I come up with cannot be undone. You must be willing to live with the circumstances I create. There are no second fixes." She stared deeply into Sookie's eyes, penetrating her soul. "You will never see me again."
"Oh. Okay," Sookie replied thoughtfully. "So we have to live with whatever reality you create for us?"
"That's it, exactly," she said brightly. "Do you have any pie? Your gran used to make the most wonderful pie."
Six hours later, Sookie had prepared the fixer two pecan pies, a turkey, a box of hot pockets, and four pots of coffee. She'd stopped talking after the first pie, and while Sookie was preparing the hot pockets, she'd pulled out a very fancy looking leather bound notebook, which she was gazing at thoughtfully.
"Do you know what you're going to do for us?" Sookie asked, sitting across from her.
"Some ideas are percolating." She narrowed her eyes at Sookie. "Do you like elephants?"
Sookie's jaw gaped. "Um, I'm not-"
"Not crazy about them," she nodded. "I thought not. Lemurs are okay though?"
"They're the little monkey things?"
Fix nodded. "Long tails. Good at hanging. They're pretty much my favourite animal. Tigers?"
"Not really into tigers," Sookie said thoughtfully, remembering Quinn. "Eric either, as far as I recall."
"He's good at sex, Eric," Fix stated. "I slept with him once. The year was 1762, and it was memorable, as I recall."
"You…slept with Eric?" Sookie questioned. "Really?"
Fix leaned in. "I've slept with almost everyone."
Sookie wasn't sure if she was joking or who she meant by everyone, so she laughed nervously. "Oh, okay."
"Everyone worth sleeping with." She tapped her book. "I'll make sure to include a specific mention about the sexing. It's pretty important, especially if I'm writing an Eric story."
"I haven't had sex since my divorce," Sookie sighed.
"Eric's going to break your vagina," Fix said thoughtfully. "Maybe I'll make you younger. You're not as young as you used to be."
"Thanks for reminding me," Sookie muttered.
The fixer grinned. "I could make you young again. Make your breasts look like they did when you were twenty-five. Would you like that?"
"I would," Sookie said, smiling at her, as she pulled a pen out of her bag.
"It can't be all good though. That wouldn't be realistic." Fix shook her head. "The best stories are realistic, at least in part."
"I've had my share of realism."
"Have you ever had malaria?" Fix tapped her book with her pen. "What about lice? Head lice. Not pubic lice."
"No…to both. You're not going to give me—"
"You could survive both. Especially if you were twenty-three. Have you ever wanted to be a vampire?"
Though she'd thought more about it in recent years, Sookie shook her head. "I don't think so."
"A demon?"
"No."
"What about a were meerkat? Or a were panda? What if you were were pandas together?" She nodded thoughtfully, presumably pleased with her creativity. "They're very rare."
"I…think I had enough weres in my life to last me a lifetime," Sookie said, hoping Fix wouldn't choose that path, but surprised that she'd considered it an option. "So you can really make anything happen?"
"I could make you both bricks in the wall next to each other if that's what I decided."
"Wow," Sookie rasped nervously. "Do…you want some more pie?"
"I'll take another pie, yes," Fix replied. "All this thinking is making me hungry. Cook for me. I haven't eaten in years."
Sookie made two more pies, just to be on the safe side, and Fix ate both of them. It was about six when she heard some stirring upstairs, which she took to be Eric rising for the day. She excused herself and opened the cubby for him, standing back as he climbed out.
"I thought it might have all been a dream," he said, unnecessarily stretching before smiling warmly at Sookie. "But here you are."
"She's downstairs. Fix." Sookie lowered her voice. "You should have mentioned that you slept with her."
"I slept with her?" he replied with genuine surprise. "When?"
"1762?"
He shrugged. "It was a long time ago. Maybe I'll remember when I see her."
"You're sure you want to go through with this? She was talking were pandas and head lice."
"Being a were panda might be kind of cool," Eric said thoughtfully. "And head lice is far more treatable than a psycho wife that you're not allowed to divorce on punishment of final death."
Sookie looked at him wistfully. "Sorry."
"It's been a swell decade," he muttered. "I was just lucky to happen by that witch a few days ago. I wasn't sure you'd want to see me, but I had to take the chance."
"I'm…glad you did."
Eric looked at her, his eyes scanning her figure, a little wider and lumpier than it had been the last time he'd seen it. Sookie self-consciously pulled her sweater around her.
"Don't be like that," he murmured, moving a step closer, stepping into her personal space.
"I've been around long enough to appreciate a little wisdom on one's figure."
"Not much wisdom here. A smarter woman would have drank less following her divorce." She blushed, as she had the night before, not used to the way he looked at her.
She'd forgotten what it was like to be admired. She stood on her tiptoes as he lay a hell of a kiss on her, warming her body, despite his own challenges in that area, and curling her toes in a matter of seconds.
"If she can't fix this, I want to at least take you to bed before I go back." He sighed. "I think we'd both enjoy it."
"You'll go back?" Sookie rasped, her voice cracking with ache. "I…I don't want—"
"Neither do I," he said simply. "I couldn't want anything less."
"She said she'd fix it."
"So whatever happens happens?" Eric asked, his fingers lingering on her collarbone. "You'd be giving up more than me. I've already lived well over ten lifetimes."
"Maybe it won't be so bad."
"Do we get to set any parameters?"
"She seems to be amenable to a conversation about it. She's been asking a lot of weird questions."
"Fixers will do that."
"There are other fixers?" Sookie asked, surprised. "I never knew."
"How do you think anything gets fixed?" he asked, his eyes gleaming. "We're just lucky you got her card. They're hard to pin down."
Fix barely looked up when Eric and Sookie walked down the stairs and joined her in the kitchen. She was fixated on her notebook, head down, scrawling away. She slammed it shut tightly when they took a seat at the table.
"I cannot write with all this pressure!" she announced boisterously. "You're both so loud. Go. Get out of here!"
Sookie and Eric exchanged a confused look. "Okay, Fix. I wasn't sure—"
She glared at them both, tucking her pen behind her ear. "Go for a walk or something. I need to concentrate."
Sookie hadn't realized that the spell Eric had paid out the ass for didn't just freeze time. It froze everything. She hadn't noticed earlier in the day, but the world was full of things incomplete; leaves in mid-air, bees unable to make their way back to their hives, frozen on their journeys.
"I'm not sure when things went wrong with us," Eric said, as they walked down Hummingbird Lane. "Maybe when Appius came back. That was…a particularly low point for me."
"We never talked about it," Sookie said, remembering back. "I wanted us to talk about it. After that…there was a weight. Like an elephant in the room."
"It's not a relationship easily discussed. Even a decade later. I guess it did last a thousand years. What's Pam's rule? A week to every month for a breakup?" He slowed down so Sookie could easily keep up. "I don't know. I sometimes think I can't remember what it's like to think and feel like a human, even when I try. I used to pay particular attention to you and your reactions, because I think, of all the people I've known, you reminded me most of what I was like, before. People are so complicated now. In my day, there was none of that. It was all about surviving, with the occasional bright spot, like eating and sex thrown in for good measure." He stopped. "My whole life, I've been under someone's thumb. My father, who forced me to marry my brother's wife, then Appius, and finally Freyda. A thousand years."
"I can't imagine."
"I never wanted you to have to." He smiled down at her. "There were a lot of conditions to my marriage."
Sookie had suspected as much for a long time. "I never wanted—"
"You made your loyalties known with the shifter. Someone had to be the better person and cut it off," he half joked, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Here's the thing though, Sookie. I can't get out without you, because I wouldn't be able to live with myself, knowing what would happen to you."
Sookie felt her heart clench uncomfortably. "I...thought you'd get out of it. I didn't think you needed it as much as Sam did."
"I know that now, since I've had ten years to reflect on it," he murmured. "But at the time, you may as well have shoved that cluvial dor through my cold, dead, heart."
"Eric..." Sookie stopped and looked up at him. "We were terrible at communicating. I don't know. I guess after a thousand years, I thought you'd be better at it."
"And I thought you'd be better at it too," he said, raising his eyebrows at her. "Maybe we'll have to work on that next time."
"She's really into lemurs. I'm a little nervous," Sookie giggled.
"Whatever she comes up with, it's fine."
"Really? Even were pandas?"
"Grasshoppers. Gnats. Whatever." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "I'm ready for something new. The politics finally did me in. A thousand years, and this has by far been the worst decade."
Sookie ached, knowing in a thousand years, that meant something. The prior decade had been shit for her too, but it was a matter of scale. "Does whatever Fix decides affect other people?"
"Of course," he replied. "Though they didn't agree to be fixed, so most fixers will create work arounds."
"Work arounds?" Sookie raised her eyebrows suspiciously.
Eric shrugged. "They'll be fine. Better off without us."
Sookie gasped loudly as the fixer appeared in front of them, out of thin air.
"Okay, I've got it!" she exclaimed, her hair frazzled, in a messy bun. "I've figured it out."
Eric smiled at her. "I do remember you. The—"
"Hut in Thailand." she smiled coyly. "Hey."
Sookie cleared her throat. "So…what's the plan?"
She sat down in the middle of the road, swatting a leaf out of her line of vision as she pulled out her notebook. "It's been ten years since a virus wiped out the entire adult population. Across the world, opportunistic kids worked to reestablish order through the creation of uneasy, fractured territories."
"So…wouldn't we be dead?" Sookie asked, trying to imagine this world she spoke of.
"No," she shook her head. "You'd be someone else entirely."
"Oh," she replied, glancing at Eric. "Okay?"
"It's a decade later, so everyone's like twenty-two or younger. The rules are changing as kids age. You're the leader of a large northern territory called Campbell. But you've got dark hair. And a twin. And an older brother. You're pretty badass. But hot. You're hot. Great rack. Not big like yours, but great all the same. And you're badass, and well-loved, but despite the confident exterior and all your successes, you're a little lost." She whipped around and turned to Eric, her eyes bright. "And you're the money guy in a mid-sized western territory that eats up most of the Pacific coast, run by your oldest friend. You're kind of complacent, but that's because it seems like too big of a job to make any real change happen. Long story short, you both end up in a really horrible situation where you're forced to depend on each other to survive. It changes everything. There's a great cast of diverse side characters too that I think you'd really like." She closed her book. "I mean, there's a lot more, but I don't want to give too much away."
"It sounds like a good story, but I'm not sure it's us," Eric finally said, reaching for Sookie's hand. "I mean, I'd read it, probably late into the morning hours with one of those fancy e-reader things, but I can't imagine myself the money guy. I'm terrible with money, I just have a lot of it. The money guy, that's really more of a Bill Compton thing."
"Oh, he's not Bill Compton," the fixer insisted. "He's a good guy. Just a little mislead. I mean, Bill's a total douche. This guy isn't. He's a good guy. They're all a little mislead on account of not having any adult supervision or guidance."
"Do…you have anything else?" Eric carefully asked. "I mean, if that's our only option, I'll take it, but—"
"You don't like it…" the fixer nodded, obviously unimpressed. "It might not be the right fit if you can't see yourself in it. Maybe I'll save it for another fix. It's a great story. I wrote a lot of it. Enough for three books."
"In ten minutes?"
"Time is an illusion, Sookie," Fix said, rolling her eyes. "Don't be stupid."
"Do…we still get a fix?" Sookie winced, afraid she'd lose her temper.
Fix looked up thoughtfully. "How about this. Sookie…you're an editor in New York. A book editor. It's not the most glamorous job, but-"
"I like this already," she said, brightening up.
"And Eric, you're a professor. A sex professor."
Eric chuckled. "I was a sex professor in the eighties."
"Sookie tries to convince you to write this textbook. A sex textbook. You're not really into it, because it's a lot of work, but she convinces you. And you fall in love, and have really hot sex, and eventually two cute kids and a great marriage." She started jotting notes. "I'll send Pam along. She'll be your sister."
"Pam can come in this one?" Eric said, a huge smile forming on his face. "Really?"
"Oh yeah," Fix nodded. "Absolutely. She'll have a great wardrobe and provide you with ample childcare so you can have great sex, even with small children."
"This sounds amazing," Sookie said, smiling at Fix. "You're…amazing."
"You leave tonight, and you won't remember anything." She looked at Eric. "The last thousand years won't have existed."
"That's okay," he agreed, smiling at Sookie warmly. "I haven't been myself for a long time."
"I'm ready too," Sookie replied, leaning into her former beau and future husband. "There's not much left for me here."
"Oh, you'll still be from here," Fix said. "You'll lose your telepathy though. It's not that kind of story."
"Fine by me," Sookie replied.
"And Eric, you won't be a vampire."
"But I'll be a sex professor?"
"World famous," Fix replied, waggling her eyebrows. "And for many reasons." She stood up and brushed the leaves off her pants. "Go about your day. When you wake up, everything will be different, and you won't remember any of this."
And with that, she vanished into thin air.
As Eric and Sookie walked back to her gran's house, Sookie could feel Eric buzzing with excitement through the remnants of their bond. She hadn't felt it in years.
"How will we find each other?" she said, wishing she'd thought to ask Fix.
He shrugged. "I guess we will. It's part of the story."
"And you're okay with not being a vampire?"
"A sex professor is a good consolation prize." He smiled to himself. "I think I'll be fine."
"I wonder how old I'll be," Sookie said, more to herself than to Eric.
Eric stopped Sookie and put his hands on her shoulders. "It never mattered how old you were, you know."
She blinked back a tear. "You never could have told me that. Never could have convinced me."
"I know," he replied, wrapping her up in his arms. "I guess I won't have to now."
They walked up to the steps of the only home Sookie had ever known. She paid attention to the creaking steps, smelled the cool Louisiana air, and, for the first time in a decade, she remembered what it felt like to hold hands with a vampire.
"How do you want to spend your last night as a vampire?" she thought to ask as he locked the door behind them.
His eyes gleamed in the dim light. "Oh, I have a few ideas."
If you liked where this is going and want to read The Expert (my most favourite of fics I wrote), it's posted on my fanfiction blog: seastarr08 dot wordpress dot com. You have to request access by clicking the tiny little "register" link at the bottom, and I'll grant you access. There's a bunch of other stories there too, a lot of which were never posted on fanfic dot net.
I hope you'll check out Campbell, and I hope you'll be in touch!
Seastarr08