Laura: Here's fanfic number 2, peoples!
Fullmetalshadowwolf: I helped out with this one. Woohoo!
Laura: Yeah, my friend here, fullmetalshadowwolf, did help me with this fanfic. Although I wouldn't really call it a fanfic, it's more like a spoof…
Fullmetalshadowwolf:Actually it's a one-shot.
Laura: Oh, whatever! Point is, it's my second story! It's supposed to be a funny guide to what NOT to do when you meet a character from InuYasha.
Fullmetalshadowwolf: Yeah. I enjoyed the part when we came up with things that would annoy the hell out of InuYasha. (evil laughter)
Laura: Ignore her. She's an evil and twisted soul.
Fullmetalshadowwolf: Only on the inside. Mwahahahaha! Go Fullmetal Alchemist!
Laura: Oi! Remember this is an InuYasha fic, not an FMA one!
Fullmetalshadowwolf: B-b-but…I love FMA! Especially Edward…(blushes)
Laura:…What was that?
Fullmetalshadowwolf: Umm, aah…(blushes harder) Forget you ever heard that!
Laura: O-kaaaaaaaaaay…I'll try to. Anyway, read on and enjoy!
Fullmetalshadowwolf: Or Edward Elric will come into your room at night and beat you up!
Laura: I'm warning you…
Fullmetalshadowwolf: Gah! I'm sorry! I mean InuYasha will come and beat you up!
Laura: That's better.
1. If you ever meet InuYasha, for the love of God, DON'T EVER…
2. Pull on his ears.
3. Squeal like a fangirl.
4. Dye his hair pink while he sleeps.
5. Pierce his ears while he sleeps.
6. Give him a manicure while he sleeps.
7. Ask him how Kikyo is doing.
8. Ask him if he's killed Naraku yet.
9. If he hasn't, recommended Sesshomaru for the job.
10. Tell him Totosai called and that he wants his sword back.
11. Buy him a pair of shoes.
12. Ask him if he wears underwear.
13. If not, give him a pair of boxers with imprints of Sesshomaru, Naraku and Koga on them.
14. Ask him to play fetch.
15. Insist that cats are better than dogs.
that wolves are better than dogs.
17. Steal his Tetsuaiga.
18. Play with his Tetsuaiga.
19. Hit him on the head with his Tetsuaiga.
20. Say 'Wind Scar' whilst holding his Tetsuaiga.
21. Tie a bright pink, frilly bow onto the Tetsuaiga.
22. Point behind him and shout, "Look! It's Naraku!"
23. Ask him if he's got the hots for Sango.
24. Say his kimono makes him look fat.
25. Say that Koga makes a better partner for Kagome.
26. Insist that Sesshomaru has a better sword than him.
27. Insist that Sesshomaru is the true wielder of the Tetsuaiga.
28. Give Naraku the Tetsuaiga.
29. Steal his clothes while he's at the hot springs.
30. Sell his stolen clothes on E-Bay.
31. When he's human, poke him constantly.
32. Call him a half-breed.
33. Every time Naraku appears, grab him and squeal "Save me, InuYasha!"
34. Ask him if he likes Scooby Snacks.
35. Say he'd look way cooler with a tail.
36. Try to make him cross dress.
37. Yell out, "SIT!" at every opportunity.
38. Ask him to come to your school for show and tell.
39. Offer him spicy curry.
40. Eat Ramen while he eats the curry.
41. Ask him to go full-demon and kill all your enemies.
42. Insult Kagome in front of him.
43. When 'nature calls' to him, hide in the bushes and spy on him.
44. Ask him if he's proposed to Kagome yet.
45. Insult him by telling him over and over that Naraku has lots more jewel shards than him.
46. Say that Shippo's a better fighter than him.
47. Ask him whether he likes Kagome or Kikyo better.
48. Show him InuxSess yaoi fanfics.
49. Show him InuxSess yaoi pictures.
50. Show him KagxSess fanfics.
51. Show him KagxSess pictures.
52. Ask him to be a live model for a game of 'Pin the Anger Mark on the pissed Half-Demon.'
53. Spray 15 different types of perfume in the room that he's in to see if his nose will explode.
54. Ask him to take a bath.
55. Show him pictures of cosplayers.
56. Super glue his Tetsuaiga to the inside of its sheath.
57. Insist that he can't use his sword properly and that he needs more practice.
58. Emphasise 57 by pointing out that he can't even take his sword out of the sheath (see 56).
59. Get him to watch the anime series 'InuYasha.'
60. Tell him that Miroku's been making out with Kagome.
61. Ask him if you can have a piggyback.
62. If you manage that, pull on his ears and insist that he's not running fast enough.
63. Tell him that you know how to get the Beads of Subirrigation off (when you actually don't).
64. Offer to teach him how to ride Kagome's bike.
65. Jump up and down on top of him if Kagome makes him sit.
66. All of the above.
Laura: (laughing so hard she's crying)
Fullmetalshadowwolf:Finally, it's over! Thank god…
Laura: It's not over yet! We still have to do Kagome and Miroku and Sango and Shippo and Naraku and Kikyo and Koga and…
Fullmetalshadowwolf: No! My brain hurts! Gah…
Laura: Btw, my favourites are numbers 56, 57, 58, 61 and 62! Please come back next time!
Fullmetalshadowwolf: Or else Edwa- I mean InuYasha will getchu!!!!!!!!!!!!