How the TARDIS sees the Doctor.
Disclaimer: *Pats empty pockets.* Does it look like I own a successful TV show?
They say the Doctor is a Great man, and they are correct. They say he is mad and unpredictable; oh, that is only the beginning. He is fire and ice and rage. Yes. He is kind. Yes. He is old so very, very old. Yes.
The humans know these things. But most of them are like children at a zoo with their noses pressed against the glass to see a lion. They see the magnificence, they see the strength. They see what they want. They don't think that the lion is caged; they don't think that he has turned meek due to their presence. But if they saw the same lion let loose in the plains of Africa, I doubt they would recognize it.
Just as they would not recognize the Doctor if they saw him in the way I do.
With me, there are no bounds. I see the extent of my thief's greatness, madness, rage, age and kindness almost every day. And with nine-hundred years of experience, I believe I am quite entitled to say that humans have gotten one thing wrong.
The Doctor is old. Yes. But, is he really?
What is that human saying: 'Age is but a number?' I am more than convinced that the saying was made specifically with the Doctor in mind.
For despite his thousand and some years of age, my thief is really just a boy. A silly, mad and wonderful boy; nevertheless, still a boy.
My reasoning is simple:
An old weary man that the humans describe would have long given up hope, would have long ago left them to suffer. But a boy, with so much hopes and dreams and hidden wisdom, wouldn't. Couldn't.
An old man would have become bitter. An old man would find it hard to forgive. But a boy? Boys punch and shout, and the next day they are best friends. Naturally, some bitterness will linger for certain people but they will still try.
And the Doctor does try so very much.
Old men become numb to wounds that are constantly opened and sloppily closed. Boys weep and grieve over each new scar while trying to gather their broken hearts. Old wounds always reopen with my thief. He never stops grieving; silently in the night as most boys would.
They don't want people to see their pain, to see that they are not as indestructible as they thought they were.
The Doctor is indestructible. Some say. I have to tell them: No, he isn't.
Old men know that they cannot fix everything. Accept it even. Boys don't; stubbornly refusing to give up until they have accomplished something. My thief sometimes pretends that he accepts it in front of humans, but I see him work himself to exhaustion until he finds a solution. I see him scream with rage before falling to the ground, crying in denial when he can't.
Old men long for peace. Boys want excitement. The Doctor is practically the embodiment of excitement. Always moving; always seeing the stars.
My Doctor loves like boys do. From a distance, nervously dancing around his girl of interest because he truly believes she is too good for him. This is why I like River Song. She invaded his space and joined in his dance; refusing to take anything less than 'yes' for an answer. The Doctor couldn't possibly resist.
His body is young. Yes. I believe his past two regenerations were trying to show what was inside and finally got it right on his last. A young man, hardly more than a boy dressing as his grandfather. It is so fitting that I would smile if I could.
He is tired. Sometimes, but aren't we all? Despite what he says, I doubt the Doctor will ever grow tired of seeing the Universe; especially with those companions of his. He has too much wonder. Too many questions of 'what if…' Old men would not have these questions. Boys do.
They say the Doctor is a Great man. And they are correct. They say he travels the Universe through Time and Space. Yes he does.
What they don't know about the Doctor however, is that he those adventures began with a silly, wonderful boy who longed for the stars in the sky. And they will end with a silly, wonderful boy who has stars in his eyes.
And that boy is all the Universe needs.
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