The Greatest Assasin
Ever
You've heard of the JFK assasination and MLK and Hitler "dying" and John Lennon and let's not forget Abe Lincoln. So many assasinations so little time. It all started in with an idea of mine, a time machine, the idea came to me after my friend Shannon came over and did nasty stuff, you'll know later on. As she got off the reverse cowgirl and left I hit my head, I woke up hours later with the thought of building a time machine so I got to work. I tried making by using a Ferrari motor and a jet engine with a high grade military computer chip, it just blew up. Then I thought the simpler it is the more likely it'll work, so I used a paper plate, paper clip, and a quantom reacter, the quantom reacter is easy to build, all you need is a plastic cup a lighter and 100 pounds of uranium. So I got to work. It worked perfectly, everything was going accordingly to plan, I was gonna go meet Atila the hun to kick his ass but some terrorist caught wind of what I built and wanted it folr their own. Apperantly osama wanted to do the same thing. So I hear the doorbell ring and I thought it was Shannon again but it was osama and his men, they find my plans and build their own. Then osama goes back in time, I had a chance to get to my time machine and I take it. So I head back a well, osama didn't know how to work it so he was heading back slowly through the time rift. Then I use my 9mm to get his ass but instead I just the time machine on November 22nd, 1963 in Dallas, texas (JFK). Since osama does listen to safety percausions he didn't put on his seat belt, he flew off the time machine so I stop as well and go after him because he pissed me off. I see him next to the president running next to the car, and then I thought, im the best motha fuckin shot in the fuckin universe, so I bring out the ol' lucy and shot it as many times as I could to tear the turbin wearing son of bitch a new asshole, so I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger but the gun only had three bullets and I shot gov. connally once and you can perobably tell where the other two went. Damn I had to blame someone; good thing was that Oswald was there. Then I chased osama, he got in his time machine and I got in mine.