TIGERS AND TOADS DO NOT MIX
Author: Linda J. Email: back: is all ways nice.
Permission to Archive: Just let me know so I can tell my friends.
Category: General Humor Rating PG for language
Disclaimer: All these characters belong to Marvel comics and Fox. I only get to take them out once in a while and play with them if I promise I won't break them.
Summery: Sabretooth and Toad never could stand each other.
"There you are!" Toad angrily grumbled once he reached the cliff where Sabretooth had perched himself. Of course the cat-like mutant had once again pickedthe hardest place to reach in order to avoid the rest of brotherhood. He had been there sense morning, quietly laying on his back with his arms folded under his head looking dreamily up into the sky. What pissed Toad off most about this situation was that once again Magneto sent him out to find the shaggy beast very much the same way a boy is sent out to fetch the family pet that had once again strayed from the yard.
"Why did you turn your phone off again mate? You know that puts the ol' man's panties in a bunch every time you do that." Toad huffed as he made his way toward the catatonic cat-man but Sabretooth offered no reply. Instead, he continued to gaze at the fluffy clouds which floated by. Toad rolled his eyes in disgust. Where in hell did Magneto find this rocket scientist, he could only imagine. "He sent me to get you," Toad continued, "He has another job for you." Still, Sabretooth pretended to hear nothing.
Toad came close enough to Sabretooth to lean over his head, blocking the felinoid's view. "Magneto..." he spoke slowly. He hoped that if he spoke slowly and clearly that maybe even this big dumb jack ass would understand. "…wants…you…to report to him...so…he…can explain…what he…wants…you to do…next."
'Now surely even this numb-nuts can understand THAT.' Mortimer thought to himself. But once more the felinoid said nothing. "Vic-tor...Vic-tor Cr-e-e-d..." The amphibinoid started to teasingly sing just to annoy him. "It's ti-i-me to go-o work-e-e work now-w-w!" Toad paused another moment or two waiting to see if his obtuse counterpart would at least finally acknowledge he was there. But instead, Toad found himself staring into a pair of black blank eyes which seemed to be concentrating on another plane of reality perhaps. Toad groaned but was not about to give up. Even though Magneto had made it clear that under no circumstance was a member of the brotherhood allowed to kill another member, tormenting, teasing, shooting vicious verbal attacks and cutting each other down, was not only tolerated but highly encouraged; and it so happened tormenting, teasing, shooting vicious attacks, and cutting Sabretooth down was one of Toad's favorite pass times mostly because Sabretooth usually did little more than growl and snarl at his rude insulting comments. But in reality Sabretooth did have his own way of getting even. He knew just how to piss this little green bastard off, just like he knew how to piss off Mags and Mystique for that matter. He had his own style, his own way of reminding these people that they didn't really control him at all. True, he was willing to cooperate, but only if and when it suited him. So he let the game continue. Sabretooth waited a good minute or so before he seemed to come out of his trance looking directly into Toad's eyes.
"Hay Wart...Do ya believe in destiny? I mean...do ya think there is a purpose to all this?" Toad was shocked. He straightened his posture as best as he could while Sabretooth went back to cloud watching.
"I don't know mate, maybe." Mortimer finally spoke in a timid voice. Creed took a deep breath and spoke thoughtfully, "I believe that there is somethin' to this destiny crap. I, I don't see how we just happen to come up this way and it all be fer nothin'."
"You mean our mutation." Toad offered. Victor shook his head and continued.
"Yeah kinda; but also how we all ended up here together." His words trailed off as the apparent gentle giant once more looked up in the sky with a deep and solemn look on his face. "I mean," the cat-man explained. "Think about it, if we weren't mutants, we wouldn't be the ones being persecuted. And if we weren't being persecuted none of us would be fightin' fer the 'cause." Toad now found himself pondering as well. Not so much on what Victor had said, but on the fact that Victor was the one who had said it!
"Is this what you do, in your spare time Sabretooth?" Toad's British accent gave his conversation a touch of class. "Spend all day pondering the mysteries of life?" Sabretooth slowly nodded his head as if to say, 'Yeah...Why wouldn't I'
"All the time, Wart. Don't you?" He confessed to his smaller and younger partner in crime. Toad was now beginning to feel somewhat shallow.
"Not...really." he quietly muttered. The two men were silent for a few awkward moments, taking turns looking at each other and their surroundings. Then Sabretooth added one last thing.
"Oh, by the way Wart..." and with astonishing speed Sabretooth grabbed Toad's leg and flung him over the edge of the cliff.
"That's fer disturbing me!" Creed could hear the little green man yelling and cussing all the down. When Sabretooth finally got up to stretch, he looked over the edge and saw that Toad was dangling from the branch of a tree by his tongue. 'Guess I'll go see what the ol' man wants.' He stretched once more and yawned a lazy lion like roar. 'No point in biting the hand that feeds me.' He noticed that Toad had made it to the bottom without harm. 'Damn. Well maybe I'll have better luck next time.'
-THE END