Flashbacks written in Italics.
"Haley, please come out of the closet"
Lucas squinted his eyes and knocked on the closet door.
"Not until you say you're sorry"
Lucas smirked at her stubborn voice and then shrugged.
"Hales, I really am sorry"
He could hear her move inside of the closet and then the door opened slightly. He could see a streak of her face in the dark closet and held back a chuckle.
" Do the dance", she commanded.
"No…Haley we are 13 now we can't do that anymore"
" Well", she said and shut the door, " then I guess I am staying in here for a while".
" Okay okay Hales, I guess…I guess I could do it"
"YES!"
She opened the door almost all the way and then looked at him with a huge grin.
"Do it Luke, I don't have all day"
" Fine, if that's the only way you can forgive me" He gave her a pleading look.
" It is the only way" She said firmly and held back a smile.
Lucas smiled at the memory. He didn't remember why she was angry with him in the first place, he just remembered the way she had laughed when he did his "forgiveness dance" and how much fun they used to have. How she was his best friend and at times his only friend. She was his confidante, sister and supporter. Then she moved away, disappeared out of his life without a word.
No one in Tree Hill knew about the move. It was the gossip of the week. Month even. People talked and gossiped and talked some more. Was it financial troubles? Divorce?
Had anybody heard from them? Where did they move?
But people never found out and after a while they stopped caring. They knew that the James's family was somewhat eccentric, by Tree Hill standards, and settled down with the fact that they just wanted to start fresh someplace else.
But Lucas never stopped caring. Haley was his best friend. She must have left some sort of clue of where she had moved. A sign or a note scribbled down on a piece of paper. Something. He searched through the minigolf court on the top of his mothers café and in their box of predictions. But he found nothing. He went into the empty house before the new buyers moved in and looked in her room. Nothing. He asked the new family that moved in there if they knew anything about the previous owners but…nothing.
After a month of looking and hoping he sat down on the roof of Karen's café and cried.
He felt like a baby for crying but he couldn't stop.
But the worst part was that he felt in every fiber of his being that there was something seriously wrong. Haley's parents would never leave unexpected like that and Haley would have told him if she knew about it. Hell she would've cried and yelled about if for weeks.
But even though he searched through his mind to find a figment of an explanation he couldn't figure it out. He would talk to his mother about it and to the guys at the river court. But eventually they all told him the same thing. They told him to get over it. Even though it hurt and it was a loss, he just had to. Haley was gone. And he had to accept it.
That was why the letter in his hands burned like fire. It opened up a closed wound with only a few sentences written with a vaguely familiar handwriting.
" Hey Luke! It's been four years. I just really need someplace to crash for the summer before college and I don't really have anywhere to go. I'm coming back. I'm really sorry".
It was a weird letter, more than weird. It was written on a folded napkin and sent to his house. The handwriting looked rushed and anxious. Lucas remembered Haley's old letters that she used to send on summer holidays. They were usually long and decorative. With stickers and different colored pencils and exclamation marks everywhere. This was nothing like those. But she was coming back.
" Broody" Lucas snapped his head around and saw a dimpled beauty in front of him with a worried expression.
"Where on god's green earth or whatever you say have you been? I've called you like a billion times" Brooke pouted and crossed her arms.
" Sorry, pretty girl but um…you know Haley right?" Brooke smiled.
" Yeah since she is like your most brooding subject of discussion! Is that why you are up here on the roof again? Remembering kinky balloon fights?"
Lucas chuckled lightly.
" She sent me a letter saying she's coming back"
" No way"
" Yes way"
"Give me the letter, I need to see this. Disappearing-girl is coming back!"
She winked.
He looked at her and felt relieved. She always made him feel better. Who knew that the always perky, pretty and sometimes quite slutty girl was girlfriend material made in heaven? Lucas hadn't known that but he had learned quickly. When Brooke Davis had stormed into his life, half naked in his backseat, he had no idea that she would mean so much to him. And here she was making him all cheery.
"Hello? Earth to Broody, I repeat earth to Broody!"
" Sorry, just got caught up in your beauty"
" Aww, that's really sweet Luke. Now give me that letter!"
He smirked and handed it to her.
" This is not a letter, this is like a napkin with some words scribbled down."
Brooke frowned.
" Yeah I guess so, but she's coming back"
" Wow, Broody, this summer just got so much more…exciting"
Haley fidgeted. She bit her lip and felt the piercing ache. She didn't know why she pierced her lip when she always bit it, but now it was too late.
She was hiding behind a tree outside Lucas Scotts house. When she looked at the familiar, homey house she felt another ache, but this time in her heart. Being here in Tree Hill made her feel panic at a whole new level. Every single bush or house had a memory attached to it. Happy memories. She had missed it so much, cried over it so much that when she now was here she was emotionless.
Everything here had stayed the same, but she had changed. It made her feel misplaced.
Tree Hill was idyllic, a beautiful small town filled with normal happy people. She was broken and she felt like a stain on Tree Hill's perfectly clean appearance. She had tried to change herself as much as possible. Not being Haley James was the only way to survive. So she had dyed her honey blonde hair dark brown, pierced her face and adopted a sulking attitude. But she couldn't stay away from school. It was still her passion, a passion that got her into college. But now standing here looking like someone she wasn't made her feel fake. She could feel the town looking right through her, calling her bluff.
She slowly built up the courage to walk up to the front door.
She knocked quietly and she felt her heart pounding through her chest, hammering on her ribcage.
Lucas. She saw him standing in front of her with a shocked expression and wide eyes.
" Hales." His voice trembled, and he just stood there watching her like she was an alien.
She walked to him and hugged him.
" Luke."
They just stood there hugging until she felt her eyes water. She couldn't stop the tears from falling and before she realized it she was crying. Loud sniffles and she saw her tears forming wet patches on Lucas' grey hoodie.
" Hales its ok." He whispered.
" Luke." She said in between sniffles.
" What happened Haley?" She didn't know what he meant. Did he wonder why they moved? Why she was here? Why she was crying? Or maybe why she had three piercings on her face? But she realized that he meant all of it. He couldn't understand. He would never fully understand. She felt the protective wall she built for four years rise in her chest and she stopped crying.
" Could we just go inside or something?"
" Yeah, um…sure. Mom's coming home soon, she was really excited when I told her you were coming. She made me move out of my room to make place for you, geek. Not that we really knew when we expected you. You surely kept us on our toes"
She could see that he was trying to lighten up the mood. There were so many things in between them. So many years and questions. But Lucas being the nice guy she knew him to be tried to make her comfortable.
" Yeah"
" Do you have any bags or something with you?" He looked around.
" Not really just my backpack"
"Okay"
"Okay"
They walked inside and Haley felt her heart constrict. It looked like old times.
Later that night, Haley finally started to breath normally. She was in Lucas' room, laying in his bed and snuggled into his freshly washed sheets. Meeting Karen again had been the best. With Lucas everything felt so…hard, but with Karen everything just went perfectly. Karen had of course glared at the piercings and quietly mumbled "about it being a shame on such a pretty face" but other then that she had been as welcoming and normal as ever. She knew that they both noticed that she was different. She rambled less, glared more and seemed more distant than before. But they couldn't say anything about it yet, it was too soon. She just had to be prepared for when they would ambush her with questions she didn't want to answer.
After eating and enjoying a quiet dinner Karen had offered her a job as a waitress, something Haley was very happy about. God knows she needed the money. She gulped at the thought of something she had pushed so far back in her brain as possible. The waitressing money wasn't enough and she knew it. But it had to do. For now. Now all she needed to do was sleep. She could feel the exhaustion in her body, numbing her senses. But she couldn't sleep. Just like many nights before Haley James lay awake until the early morning.
" Rise and shine, geek!" Lucas said and chuckled as he entered his own room the next day. He could hear Haley's muffled groans and his smirk grew. Usually Haley would be the chipper morning person but he guessed that the roles were now reversed. He felt the power and decided to give her a morning to remember. He went into the kitchen and found two pans. He knew that things weren't like before but that didn't mean he couldn't pretend. He smiled at himself, content with his plan.
" Wakey, wakey Hales." He said and started crashing the pans against each other.
" NO! Not again, no please." Haley said with panic evident in her voice. Lucas dropped the pans immediately and sat down next to her.
"Sorry Hales, it's only me, sorry. I just wanted to prank you back, like old times."
" Oh." Haley said dumbfounded. " What the actual fuck Luke do you think you are doing? Dude waking up people like that is just… wrong!" She quickly stood up and started walking.
" Haley James are you cussing?" He stood in complete chock.
" I'm not Haley James anymore, Luke." She said before storming out of his room.
" Apparently not" He mumbled to himself. It was going to take time and he knew that but Haley James would be Haley James again. Lucas Scott would make sure of it.
"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck" Haley paced. She could not and would not cave in and walk back up to Lucas. How dare he wake her up like that. But then again he didn't know. And he was trying to be funny. Haley realized that she was still in her sweats and sighed. She reluctantly walked up the stairs.
" Well, well, well fancy seeing you here Haley" Lucas chuckled and then gave her a sweet smile. He hoped that if he pretended like nothing happened she would play along.
" No more morning surprises?" She gave him a small smile.
" None, but maybe we can go to the rivercourt and meet the gang and…wecanalsomeetmygirlfriendBrooke" He mumbled.
" Girlfriend? Brooke? WAIT A SECOND, BROOKE DAVIS? She giggled at the thought. Brooke and Lucas. She started to laugh. Lucas narrowed his eyes.
"But you're a loser, Luke." She said in between giggles.
" HEY! Brooke happen to think that I am very handsome and non losery, thank you very much" Lucas said with mock hurt and pouted.
" Haha, Luke…wait dude, what happened with Peyton? You know, the love of your life and Brooke's best friend forever?" Haley asked and wiped away the tears from her eyes. She tried to stop laughing, but then an image of Brooke and Lucas appeared in her mind and she started again.
" Long brooding story. And stop laughing at me, it's rude" He said and crossed his arms over his chest.
" Sulk, sulk, I wanna go and meet the sassy girlfriend." Haley swatted him on the arm.
"Ow, see I've just forgotten how much of a pain you are Hales." She glared at him.
"Dude don't even go there if you want to keep your body intact." She nudged him playfully. Lucas sighed of relief, the Haley James he knew and loved started to creep out of her shell.
" Get out of here, I have to get dressed. See ya later, loser" She said and pushed a smiling Lucas out of the room.
" Hey, IT IS MY ROOM HALES" He yelled from the outside the closed door.
" Well, do you want to see me change?" Haley chuckled.
" Ew, never mind, meet you downstairs."
It's always hard when you lose a friend. When you can see them slipping away, it's in their eyes. You can see them getting bored or pull away and then before you realize it all you've got left are the memories of happier and easier times. Lucas couldn't help but feel that way when he quietly studied Haley as she sat on his sofa. She was so close but still out of reach. He sighed and she looked up from her book with a faint smile on her lips.
" Is it hard figuring me out?" She said and raised her eyebrow.
" Yeah." He admitted.
" Brooke was nice. I mean she was a little too curious but I have to admit it she seems to like you." Haley said in an attempt to change the subject. She quickly put her hair behind ears.
" Yeah. She's always been waiting on your return. You know meet the best friend thing."
" How did you know that I would come back, Luke?" She said coldly.
" I don't know what happened Haley, and it seems to me like you don't want to talk about it, but no matter what Tree Hill is your home. I am your family. And family always reunites." She had to smile at him. He was a total sap, just like always. She loved that about him, his sensibility. He was never afraid to come off as less masculine just because he expressed feelings. She realized that she had to give him a chance, after all he was pretty much all she had.
" I know what you mean." She mumbled quietly.
" Hales, I've missed you so much." Lucas' voice was full of emotions and she couldn't look at him. It hurt too much.
" I'm not sure I can be your Hales again. Promise not to be disappointed."
" You could never disappoint me Haley." He said convincingly and shrugged.
" So what's been going on in your life while I was away?" She asked and closed her book.
" I met Brooke and I've got a brother." He said and grinned.
" Brother?"
" Nathan. He and I kind of bonded this year. And I would say that he's one of the best dudes I've ever met, a little rough around the edges but he's cool. I mean Dan pretty much fucked him up and still he rose above it. He hangs out here a lot; Mom makes him dinner because he can't cook for shit. It's actually pretty funny. He's hosting this party at his place on Saturday. You should come with me. It will be pretty rad." He rambled.
It was a lot to take in. As long as Haley could remember Dan and his family was the scum of the earth. She could still recall all those nights when Lucas would come home and just cry because of something Nathan had said. Haley suddenly felt like the outsider. She had no idea what was going on with her best friend. A couple of tears welled up in her eyes and she blinked them away.
The rest of the week flew by much to Haley's relief. She kept to herself, working at Karens café and trying to keep all conversation light and easy. Complication was the last thing she needed. She was actually looking forward to the party, she just wanted to forget about everything and Lucas would see that she enjoyed having fun and he could finally stop worrying. He was walking on eggshells around her and it was starting to piss her off. And Brooke kept coming over to "chat" but it felt more like an interview session each time. She just wanted to be left alone. But this was Tree Hill, she realized, where gossiping was the ultimate pastime.
" Hey sugar-pie. You're new here." A man said and gave her an appreciative look. She snorted and let out a quick sigh. She had no time for perverts.
" Yeah but that doesn't mean that you've got a right to stare at my ass, asshole." She bit out. Karen looked at her with wide eyes before quickly approaching them. The man looked at her weirdly before returning to his pie.
" Haley." Karen said in a light whisper before leading Haley away to the counter.
" Yeah?" Haley said visibly irritated.
" That was just Hank. He calls everyone sugar-pie and I can assure you he wasn't staring at your uhm behind. He has a lovely wife and wonderful kids. You need to be nice to my regulars. I love having you here but this is a small business and I'll take all the customers I can get. And you've been snappy all week and I'm sorry but that's not acceptable. I let you stay at my house, and trust me I enjoy having you here, but I need you to be nice at work." Haley's expressive eyes visibly darkened and she bit her lip so hard she could almost taste blood.
" Well I'll find some other place. I don't want to be a burden." Karen looked at her desperately.
" Haley, sweetie, that is not what I meant. Please stay."
" I'm not a charity-case. So don't sweat it. I'll be nice and I'll move out when my shift ends." Karen didn't know what to say. This was nothing like the levelheaded and considerate Haley she knew and loved. This was a lost and sad girl and Karen's heart broke at the sight.
" I want you to stay." Karen said once again and carefully put a hand on Haley's tense shoulder.
" I don't want to. Thanks for having me. I'm sorry if I was trouble." Haley said and shook her shoulder causing Karen's hand to drop.
" Where are you going to live then? And Lucas will be so upset." Karen tried to reason.
" I'll rent something and I think Lucas will do alright. He managed four years without me and became be happier then ever before." She snapped.
" Haley you are being absolutely ridiculous. He missed you every second of every day. I don't know what has happened to you but right now you are being downright disrespectful." Karen's hair bounced as she shook her head.
" Whatever. I promise to serve every pervert with kind smile and I'll see you tomorrow." Haley said and ran a tired hand trough her dark hair. She grabbed her purse and walked urgently towards the door. She needed a break. And alcohol. Thank god for Nathan's party.
She looked around the scruffy apartment and scrunched her nose. This place looked like shit but at least it wasn't moldy like the last place she lived in. A familiar man walked in and she smiled.
" Hello gorgeous. I've missed you this past week so I'm happy to be here. Just for you." He smirked and let his eyes roam over her petite body. She was dressed in a black dress that was just appropriate enough to make her look equally innocent and at the same time mysteriously sexy. Her piercings made her look even more appealing.
" Shut up Felix. I know why you're here. To deal and gamble so don't try to flatter me. But I really appreciate you letting me stay here. I don't feel like living in the backseat of your car again." She applied a little more lip gloss and kinked her eyebrow.
" So you're going out without me? Little miss homebody partying. I'm shocked." He said with mock hurt and put his warm hand on the small of her back.
" Oh Felix . You can come if you want. I honestly don't care about what Lucas and his stuck up friends think about me anymore." She muttered. Truth was she did care. The way Lucas had looked at her when she packed her backpack last night was enough to make her cry. But she had warned him. She couldn't be his Hales anymore. Haley had thought that coming to Tree Hill would fix her but she just felt more left out. She was not that kind of perky person anymore.
" Party. Are you sure you don't want some pre-party fun? I could show you a good time." He slowly dragged his hand over her ass. She turned around and rolled her eyes. Felix and her would just be a train wreck. But that guy was seriously hornier than any other boy she had ever met.
" Down boy. Do you have some liquor in this craphole?" She giggled.
" You bet your cute ass I have." He said and walked over to the cabinet and pulled out two large bottles of clear liquid. She couldn't help but notice his tanned skin and taut muscle that peaked trough when he lifted his arms. She smiled to herself and blushed.
" Here." He said and gave her a bottle.
" Bottoms up." She giggled as raised their bottles and started chugging. This night was going to be fun, fun, fun.
Lucas was upset, that much was clear to Brooke. He kept pacing all over the place and it was starting to get on her nerves. She was trying to get into party-mode but he seemed reluctant to follow her lead.
" Talk to me." She demanded. She had to smile when she saw him squint his gorgeous baby-blue eyes. Brooke had never been in love before but she had to say that it was the best thing ever. The way he looked at her, the way he kissed her. Small notes on her bedside table and holding hands. Making out in his room and praying that his mother wouldn't peek in. She loved all of it. The only downside was that she could feel his pain. It was like they were one, and that they shared all emotions. And now she could feel his sour mood affecting her happy one.
" Haley. She is just so different. She is hard to reach, and she yelled at my mom last night and I just hate it. She is my best friend but right now I'm not even sure I recognize her." He put his head in his hands.
" You have to let her breathe. You told me to talk to here this past week and all it made her do was close up even more. She just needs time. Obviously life hasn't been fair to her and she just has to catch up with it all. But deep down she is still the same." Brooke said and smiled gently. He looked at her with admiration and the constant swarm of butterflies in her stomach intensified.
" I like you so much." Lucas said and gave her a peck.
" Mhm, you too." She mumbled as she started to place kisses on his jawline.
" We don't have to be early to this party right?" Lucas said with eyes shut.
" Definitely not." She grinned.
Haley was buzzed. Buzzed to the point that her vision was a little bit blurry and the ground wobbly. She giggled and leaned further into Felix's warm body. He wrapped one arm around her and smiled when he felt her soft body against the contours of his hard one.
" Where is this beach house?" He said and tried to suppress a chuckle.
" Keep on walking lazy." She whined and pushed him forward.
" I can't believe you drank so much. Of our bunch you're usually Miss Responsible." He laughed as she burped loudly.
" Drinking is fun. Oh there it is. Isn't that a pretty house, so pretty. " She said and giggled.
She stumbled on the lawn and walked towards the entrance. A tall boy she recognized as Nathan stood in the doorway and she climbed up the stairs. She had to admit that he looked hot.
" Who are you?" He said as he took in her drunken appearance.
" I'm Haley. The girl of your dreams." She laughed at herself. He looked at her half-amused and half-irritated. She was cute, that he could give her. Her petite body was curvy in all the right places and her lips we're supple and pink. But when Nathan looked into her eyes he could see the haziness and the sadness. She was clearly a mess and besides; he hated girls with piercings.
" I don't know you and this is a small get together. Could you please leave?" He asked tiredly. Party crashers were the last thing he needed and the girl was seriously drunk.
" Man don't be such a bore." A tall cheesy looking guy said with a smirk.
" Hey. I know you. I am Lucas's best friend." Haley interrupted and smiled triumphantly.
" Oh." Nathan stood there dumbfounded and Haley took her chance and slipped inside. She gave him a sloppy wink and disappeared into the room.
" You are not getting in here." Nathan told Felix and sighed.
" Whatever. Keep an eye on her. And tell her to call me. I'll pick her up." Felix said.
" Yeah dump your drunk girlfriend on me." Nathan scoffed.
" She is not my girlfriend. Although I wish sometimes." Felix mumbled before walking away. Nathan raised his eyebrows. He was looking forward to score but with this crazy girl in his household he was suddenly on babysitting duty. He was going to kill Lucas when he arrived.