Author's note: The idea for this little story came from listening (obsessively) to the Zelda-themed album Songs of Time by Nathan Sharp. So this is probably as much a poem based on that album as much as it is on Zelda. Enjoy!
The Legend of Zelda
-Gather children, let me tell you
My father told me this story
When I was a child,
Ill and dumb,
He told me this story.
Long have I yearned
To tell this to me kids,
Then you were born and I have waited,
So sit my children-
Put a log on the fire! I tell you!-
This is the Legend,
The story my father would tell,
Yarning in his old age,
I tell you,
The Legend of Zelda.
-Long ago,
Or so the story goes,
The kingdom of Hyrule thrived
And it thrived for it had a Princess,
Zelda, they say her name was.
-Zelda the Princess kept the kingdom grown,
For she had the Triforce of Wisdom,
A golden triangle with magical power,
And the world was peaceful.
-There was a wizard named Ganon,
A beast of a man with magical power,
Who kept a twin called the Triforce of Power,
And Ganon was greedy,
So he sought the other Piece
And came one day-
It might have been night-
And captured the Princess.
-But Zelda was cunning and wise
And before he could attack,
She split the Triforce into eight pieces
And scattered them across the land,
Concealing a piece in each of Hyrule's eight labyrinths.
-When Ganon came,
Zelda sent her maid Impa out
Into the land of harsh adventure
And told her to find a hero to unite the Pieces.
-And so Impa set,
But was eventually attacked by Moblins-
Beasts in Ganon's army-
And she feared the worst,
But save! for a hero appeared,
A boy in the green of a child
Who scared away the monsters,
And Impa thanked him and,
Remembering Zelda's request,
Told him of the Princess and Ganon,
The fate of Hyrule and begged
Link- that's the hero's name- to accept.
-Link, being the hero and all,
accepted the quest
And so he went out and began his journey.
-First on his journey,
He needed a sword to defend,
And so he reached a cave in which an old man-
No, not me, I'm not that old!- dwelt
And told the man of his quest,
And so the man gave him a wooden sword,
Old and worn and green,
My father always said.
-Thanking the man,
Link began his journey again,
This time, sword in hand.
-He fought many creatures,
As he set out on his quest,
And he killed many a creature-
Octoroks and Moblins and Gorriyas,
Zolas, Armos, and Leevers-
And found the first labyrinth.
-The Eagle labyrinth,
Known to some as Level 1-
No idea why, or what it means, don't ask-
Housed within a first piece,
But it was enshrined.
-Room by room, Link did kill,
Creatures of evil,
The dastardly Keese-bats,
The children of Stal,
The Gels of indeterminate means,
Growing strength in his heart and mind,
And he reached the end of the labyrinth.
-From the void it came,
A giant creature of infernal cast
A dragon! hear a dragon!
The greened wyrm, Aquamentus,
The one they speak of only in legend and campfire tales.
-The greened wyrm attacked,
A guardian of the Triforce piece,
And many a time sent raging fire,
But the troubled the hero not,
For he simply blocked it aside-
Did I tell you his shield was magic?-
And within time slew
And the greened wyrm's head rolled on the labyrinth floor.
-And in the next chamber,
The hero found a piece of glowing gold,
A shard of the Triforce of Wisdom,
The relic shattered by Zelda-
Did I mention the Princess enough?-
And so he took the piece
And was spirited out and away
And he continued his quest again.
-Not to bore or bog the story,
And you kidders don't care,
So I'll skip out the rest.
-Link killed the guardians of the other labyrinths,
Dodongo the Lizard who disliked smoke,
Manhandla the Plant who had four hands,
Gleeok the Hydra with hid many red heads,
Digdogger the Eye who hates certain kinds of sound,
And Gohma the Arthropod- Aim at the eyes!
-And finally Link came,
With new weapons and a magical sword,
To Death Mountain Level 9-
Why do you kids keep asking what that means?-
Where the beast Ganon dwelled.
-A tremendous journey ensued,
For Death Mountain was huge,
And after ever a long quest,
Link reached the end
And opened a door into Ganon's lair.
-A wizard so vile,
And repulsive at that,
Ganon began,
And Link began back.
-The two began to spar,
Ganon with spear,
Into the night the fought far,
But Link was sans fear.
-Ganon's power was waning
And Link's heart was too,
And on his chest grew a staining,
For Link had shot true.
-With little a scream
Ganon fell down,
Link's heart was gleam
And Ganon's ashes hit the ground.
-The Triforce of Power,
Shining and gold,
Stood bright at the hour,
And its magic he did behold.
-With both Triforces in hand
Link continued to press
And in the next chamber
He freed the Princess of her duress.
-So there it is children,
I'm finished my yarning,
Go on and play now,
Unless you want to know,
The other stories my Father Link told.