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Adult Content Warning… Rating - Strong T (please tell me if you think it should be an M rating)
I was wondering how two people like Booth and Brennan could have a whoopsie pregnancy. I was going through different scenarios and this popped into my head.
Before you throw rotten tomatoes, Google it… it's an actual thing… my husband used to do it. I enjoyed teasing him about it too but I'm not going to give anymore away so here it is...
As the camera fades out on the final scene in The Hole in the Heart (6x22)
…
Booth wriggled Brennan around so that they were under the sheets and held her as the sobbing subsided; gently and evenly stroking up and down her back in a comforting rhythm. When the tears finally stopped, he grabbed a tissue from his side table and passed it to her. She pulled herself up on her elbow, still leaning over him, sniffed and wiped her nose with a small smile of appreciation, "Thank you, Booth. I'm sorry. I'm just. It's just so sad, you know?"
He lifted her face and looked intently into her eyes, "I know, it's okay Bones, that's what I'm here for, okay? That's why I wanted you to stay here with me tonight."
Brennan's eyes began to well again, "Booth, that bullet was meant for you… I keep seeing your blood seeping through my hands again… the life draining from your eyes. Just like Vincent's. I just… I can't lose you again, Booth. I know it's entirely sentimental and foolish but when you died… when Pam Noonan shot you… it was like a part of me died too. I'm only just strong enough to admit that now and if Broadsky gets to you before I…"
"Hey, hey, shhh, shhh… he's not getting to me Bones, okay, I promise."
Tears splashed to his chest again as she shook her head, "No, Booth, you can't make promises like that, you can't."
He cupped her cheek to stop her shaking and caught her eyes with his, "Temperance, listen to me. We'll get him. Just like we always do. Trust me, okay? He's going to pay for what he did to Vincent."
She nodded and took a deep shuddering breath, "I… I love you, Booth… very, very much and it's... frightening."
Booth gave a light laugh and tears sprung to his eyes as he brought her face up to his, "Hey, listen… I love you too, Bones. More than I ever thought possible."
Unable to hold back a smile, Brennan whispered, "Then come back to me tomorrow… Get Broadsky then come back to me."
He nodded, "I will." Then he claimed her lips in a long kiss full of promise before tucking her into his side, lulling her to sleep with gentle strokes over her back.
…
Booth's consciousness floated contentedly to the surface and his body, fully rested, became aware of the warm, naked skin of his partner spread across his bare chest; the sun casting a golden slice of heaven across her sleeping face. He ran an inquiring hand from her back, past her breasts and down and over her smooth arse before stopping; entirely awake; his traitorous manhood standing to attention.
With no memory of anything more than a kiss shared between them the night before, his heart began pounding guiltily and he cursed under his breath, "Shit, shit, shit…"
Brennan stirred, "Mmmhm… Booth?" pushing herself up off his chest slightly, her eyes squeezed shut at the light; she lifted the sheet to peek curiously at their naked bodies, "Did we? ...Did you?"
Booth held his arm in place around her torso, praying for her not to bolt, "Now Bones, don't freak out on me, okay, I'm…"
She smiled tiredly and rested her head back onto his chest, "I'm not freaking out, Booth… I'm just a little hazy on the details, but…" She laughed as a memory came to her, "I seem to recall you ordering me in no uncertain terms to take my panties off and then… wow, Booth, I never imagined you to be so assertive…" her nose scrunched up, "…and bossy…"
Booth groaned, "Oh, God, Bones, this is not how I imagined our first time to be." He scruffed his face and groaned some more, "Oh, God, I can't believe this is happening."
Brennan pushed herself up on his chest and looked at him, bed hair poking adorably out in all directions, "What's wrong? I liked it."
Booth grimaced, "Ah, Bones, you see, I have this… thing… that happens sometimes when I'm asleep… Jeez, this is awkward…"
She smiled teasingly, "You mean sexsomnia?"
His eyebrows shot up, "Huh?"
Brennan laughed throatily, pointing him playfully in the chest, "You sleep sexed me!"
He grabbed a pillow and squeezed it over his head. A muffled groan escaped, "Ahhh… I can't believe this is happening!"
Brennan pulled the pillow from his grasp and brought his face up to look at him seriously, "Cut it out, Booth, it's fine… from what I remember of it, you were very, very sexy… like a regular alpha male cave man."
She pecked him on the lips and he twined his fingers through the hair at the back of her neck, pulling her in for a deeper kiss, "I'm sorry, baby, I'll make it up to you, I promise."
Smiling, she nodded, "I know you will." After kissing him a bit more, Brennan pulled back and enquired, "So, has this… thing happened much before?"
Booth rolled his eyes before reluctantly answering, "Yeah… remember Tessa?"
Nodding, she hummed, "Ah hm."
"Yeah, well, that's how we ended."
Brennan's eyebrows furrowed in shock, "Why, just because you had sexual intercourse with her in your sleep?"
He shook his head guiltily, "No, because I had sex with her in my sleep, calling out your name."
She laughed loudly, "No way!"
"Yes, way!" peeking out from one eye he made a further confession, "…And Cam… same thing… probably why she didn't take to you so well at the start there."
Rolling onto her back Brennan chuckled heartily, "Oh my God, that's… that's really amusing, Booth! Haha! What about Hannah?"
He lifted himself up onto his elbow, tickling her lightly in the ribs, "Yeah, once… in Afghanistan before I told her your nick name so she didn't know what I meant when I called out,Bones! Probably figured it out later though, I don't know. If she did, she didn't say anything."
Her laughing died down and she looked up at him smiling, "I read that approximately 1 -2 percent of the general population has experienced sexsomnia. In fact there was a sleep study conducted in Toronto a couple of years ago and 8 percent of the participating patients reported engaging in sleep sex… it's quite fascinating really."
His hand slipped over her belly absently, "And how come you know all that huh?"
She smiled mischievously, "Why do you think Sully was so insistent on dragging me across the country away from you? I think the sailing invitation was just subterfuge."
Booth chuckled and his eyes widened, "No way! You too?"
Brennan giggled, "Yes there were a few awkward morning conversations that I'd rather not have again."
He dropped back down to the bed, snuggled up to her and sighed; fingers slipping adoringly over her face, "Why don't we ever do things normally like normal couples huh?"
She smiled sadly, the events of the day before coming back in a rush of emotions, tears pricking at her eyes, "Because then we'd just be a normal, boring couple… and we're not…"
He smiled warmly and slipped a kiss over her lips, "No, we're not are we, Bones… we're pretty damn extraordinary, you and me."
She looked deeply into his eyes and pulled him close, a tear rolling quietly down the side of her face, "Yeah… So… you said before that you've imagined our first time together… can you show me how you imagined that, Booth?"
He smiled and with eyes wide open, Booth showed Temperance that they were merely two parts of a complete whole, occupying the same space, time and sweet pleasures… alive, awake and extraordinarily perfect.
…
So, have you heard of sexsomnia?
