Disclaimer: I don't even own a hair from these characters, thus they are not and will never be mine because they belong to Joss.
Summary: Spike fancies a certain Watcher…slash S/W
Spoilers: nothing specific but set in Season 5 of Angel
Feedback: As of now I consider this complete, but if you want more let me know. Reviews would be nice. Please no flames.
Thanks: Constant Comment Tea, thanks for helping out with the little grammar details and all!
Authors Notes: This is my first fanfic online. I didn't write this story as much as it wrote itself. I just typed on the keyboard and this is what happened.
When I originally posted this online part of a line from the story made its way to the top of the story. If it's on here you will see what mean. Just ignore it. If it's not here then I guess the problem was magically solved.
Part One
Spike has been in L.A. for almost six months helping Angel help the helpless (or the stupid gits with no common sense if one dared to view it from Spike's point of view). When Spike became a solid vampire again he had the choice to leave Wolfram & Hart, but chose to stick around because there were comfy leather chairs to sit on. This weekend he decided to drive down to Sunnydale and visit the Scoobies. Even though he and Buffy had become good friends since the day he sacrificed himself, it wasn't Buffy he wanted to see. He had called Willow earlier that day and told her to meet him the cemetery. She was a little perplexed that Spike couldn't meet her at Buffy's house, but he insisted that they speak in private. Willow sat by a tree and waited. When Spike finally arrived he told her what had been on his mind the past few weeks.
Spike: I never thought of myself as a girly man— (Spike paused a moment). Well, vampire. I liked big boobs, although can't say I still don't from time to time; now I find myself thinking about other things that get big…you know …like a man's Christmas tree and jingle bells. (Spike rolled his eyes in frustration) O balls, now I just ruined the image of Christmas for myself.
Wait a tic, I know what you're thinking: me and Angel, what we had and all. Well, he was my sire, wasn't like I didn't have the choice not to please him, anyway I had Dru and he had Darla, and sometimes we had each other—never when the girls were around…well actually...never mind.
After Angel got his soul and become a goody boy, he left our little gang in search of I'll never understand what—redemption or something like that. I was mad at him because he left me alone in a very dark world where I had to fend for myself. Can't say I've ever forgiven him completely, but with my soul now, I think about it, but I'll never do it mind you. Spike waved his finger extremely close to Willow's face to emphasize his point. She moved her head back a little to avoid losing an eye. That's why each time I see him I beat the hell out of his face: cause he deserves it. Plus, it's the only way that I can technically hold him, but you don't go tellin' people that I told you that.
My point of this little speech is to say that…well, actually….hmmm, well…errr (Spike scratched the back of his head) it was phrased easier in my noggin, and it's kinda embarrassing to tell, but…I think I like men. There I said it, I'm a gay vampire. (He stretched his arm in open invitation) World, did you hear that? I like bouncy balls, you know, and your right, there's nothing wrong with it, it's just the way I am. And I'll have you know it's not easy, especially when I have a thing for…o never mind, you wouldn't want to know. Ok fine don't get your panties in a twist, I'll tell you, but you have to swear across your heart and your eye and all that other stuff that you won't tell. Ok: I think Wesley is a nice a man. And I think he has some nice features inside and out. Sheesh I like to stare at his crotch when he's talking for Christ's sake! Yea that area is nice, too.
No, I haven't talked to him about it yet because each time I try I get all nervous and he just stares at me so I normally tell him to sod off, but I don't want him too, but I've told him too and so he walks away in his prissy little manner…it's so hot. Gaaa…this is so hard, why does having a soul make things so difficult? My stomach feels like it's been smashed by a giant. Spike propped his arms up on his knees and thumped his chin down into his hands. And you know what? I'm actually more nervous for him than for me, because I want him to like me. I hate souls, and people with souls. Yeah I know, a soul is complicated and I will never fully understand it.
What should I do? He put one hand down and titled his head into the other hand. Maybe I'll just pin him up against a wall in a dark ally and kiss him till he can't stand it anymore. You're right, that only works in the B rated movies. O I know, I'll invite him to dinner, and it will be fancy and all, then I'll tell him how I feel. Yeah, sounds like a good idea to me too. I'll call Lorne he can help me plan for my date. Here's a tip, never unknowingly sing in front of him cause he can read your mind.
You know thanks for listening to me rant about this, you're the only one I feel comfortable around, you understand me. Can I have a big hug, Red?
Willow: Well sure, I mean you just opened yourself up and spilled your guts out to me, I mean not literally because…eww. Spike wrapped his muscular arms around her and held her close, his grip was uncomfortably tight. Willow thought she might pass out but Spike let go just as she became dizzy. You'll have to let me know how everything works out for you. Go get 'em or him…hehe...a little joke at the end there to get you going. Now go back to L.A., but don't drive too fast.
The next morning Spike knocked on Lorne's magenta office door.
Lorne: "No, I did not order thirty elephants for the party…well send them back!...Then you tell my clients they have to pack thirty tons of animal into their not-so-spacious cave-home. What do you mean you can't? Wait elephants can do that? If you put it like that then…hey I have someone at my door, I've give you a ring later sweets…ciao. Lorne hung up the phone, tapped something in his spiffy new Palm Pilot organizer, and motioned Spike into his office. "Well hey Bleach Peach! Come on in and tell papa what's on your mind, or better yet let me do it for you. Haha…Just hum a little ding bugger for me. Spike rolled his eyes and sang a line from an Alice Cooper song. Lorne put up his hand to stop Spike. Whoa, I'm sensing some big new swirly vibes from you buddy, sit down" Lorne pointed to the purple shag chair across from his desk. Spike shut the door behind him and sat down.
Spike: I got some things that I've been thinking about and I figured you would be the one to see about this, 'cause…I mean..."
Lorne: Listen hot pocket I can tell just by looking at you that you are going through some major changes in your life, and Babes it's nothing to be ashamed of, and thoughts are very different then actions.
Spike: But that's just it. I don't want this to be a thought. I want it to be real, but I don't know how. Here's where you come in, Jolly Green.
Lorne: Hey, I'm the one who does the name calling around here sugar cube. Just to be clear: what is it that you want to make a reality? I mean I think I know what it is that you want, 'cause you're a walking sun beam, relatively speaking--the kind that doesn't turn you into dust. So spill my peroxide friend, tell papa what it is.
Spike: Ummm, do I have to? Don't you know already because of your…Spike gestured aimlessly, trying to get his point across…mind reading stuff?
Lorne: Well yes, sweet pea, I do, but I need to hear you say it. Look, it's part of the process, alright? If you don't say it then I can't help you.
Spike: Bullocks. But I already talked to Willow about this: she was much more understanding. Plus she gave me a hug (just wanted you to know that before I spill my feelings to you). So ummm…I'm not really into girls anymore…I've crossed over to the other side. So to speak.
Lorne: You're gay now?
Spike: Are you deaf? Yeah, that's what I just told you! Spike quickly stood up almost knocking the chair over. He began to pace back and forth. It helped to keep his temper down. Well yeah I guess, I've switched back and forth a few a times over the years, you know: Dru, Angel, Buffy, Angel, and now…well he doesn't know--but that's why I wanted your help. What do I do to get him to notice me?
Lorne: Stop the Waltz and rewind. Let me get this straight, you and Angel were once an item? I knew it! Lorne clapped his hands in delight. I can always sense the sexual tension between you two, it's all coming together now. Anywho, who wants to talk about Angel when we can talk about good old Wesley.
Spike: Finally! Wait, how did you--I never gave a peep about that!
Lorne: That hair dye has really gotten to your brain…I read minds! Hello I've been reading your mind since you stepped into my office. So first I need to figure out how Wes feels about things. And by things I mean men or vampires—well, vampire men with bleached blond hair. So I'll talk to him and let you know the results of our little big chat. In fact I'll do it right now. Honey Buns, go tell Wes that he needs to see me in my office pronto.
Spike: Ummm well I…
Lorne: Plum cake, you want to talk to him, start out by doing this.
Spike: O bullocks! Fine, whatever.
Spike left the room, he walked down the hall and made his way towards Wesley's office. If he had a beating heart it would be jumping through his shirt right now, but since he didn't he had to settle for butterflies in his stomach. He stood outside Wesley's door, took a deep breath of non-air, and knocked.
Wesley: Yes, come in.
Spike slowly opened the door and popped his head in.
Spike: Lorne wants to see you in his office...Something he wants to speak to you about...I mean he has something to speak with you about something...So yea. I guess you should go now. His office is down the hall and to the left.
Wes: Yes, I am well aware of where Lorne's quite magenta office is, thank you Spike.
Wesley stood up from his desk that was sprawled over with books.
Spike: You're welcome, mate (Spike said shyly, staring at the floor)
Wesley walked out the door staring at Spike. He had never heard him say "you're welcome" to anyone before. Wesley knocked on the already half-open door.
Lorne: Hey Pumpkin, come on in take a seat. I've got some things I need to discuss with you. Lorne folded his hands on the desk. And these are going to be some personal questions. Why don't you sing me a little ditty to get the balls I mean ball rolling? Wesley sang a line from "Singing in the Rain". Thanks chap. Now, there's no easy for me to ask this, so I'm going to dive off the board and hope my horns stay intact. Are you gay?
Wesley: Erm…Excuse me? (He squirmed in his chair)
Lorne: Let's phrase it this way. Do you like men, or do have an obsession with bananas?
Wesley: Ah I see, well, I don't think I consider myself to be a homosexual if that's what you mean, but that's not to say that I haven't stared at men and admired their bodies.
Lorne: So you've been turned on by men then?
Wesley: You could phrase it like that, I suppose. Lorne, what is this all about? I really don't see the need to be discussing a topic like this during business hours.
Lorne: Eh…right you are, I'm only asking because there is someone else in this office who has an adorable little crush on you, and well I guess I've sorta got myself into the role of matchmaker.
Wesley: Hmmm, and how long has Spike had a crush on me?
Lorne: Well, I don't exactly know a while I guess...How did you figure it out?
Wesley: Well it's not hard to tell, really. He's been excessively nice to me, makes small talk and always seems very shy around me--he seems quite at a loss for words when we speak. Correct me if I'm wrong but that is how one acts when he or she, or he in this case, has a crush.
Lorne: So will you go on a date with him?
Wesely: You're being quite blunt and to the point, Lorne.
Lorne: Well I've never done anything like this, ok well there was that once but aside from that, no. And your not answering my question.
Wesley: Hmmm, well I guess I could, but only if this doesn't get out around the office: that means no telling about this. This is just a date between, well it's just a date.
Lorne: You got it, Sugar.
Later that night Wesley and Spike met up at Don Pablo's in L.A. Spike had arrived earlier then Wesley and was sitting at a table in the smoker's section, sipping on a strawberry daiquiri. Wesley spotted him from the entrance and made his way toward Spike. When he reached the table, Spike stood up and pulled out a chair for Wesley.
Wesley: Thank you Spike.
Spike: You're welcome.
Wesley: That's the second time you've said that to me today.
Spike: Spike stared downward into his glass, slightly embarrassed. He said quietly, I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it--especially to you.
Wesley: Wesley cleared his throat somewhat awkwardly. Yes of course. Look, before we continue, I think we should discuss what our date is about. What are you hoping to get out of this?
Spike: I dunno, I want to get to know you better, I want to have a nice chat with you, and I guess have fun tonight. You?
Wesley: Wesley pondered his answer for a moment. The same for me I guess. Another pause. So when or have you come out?
Spike: Well, I've known for quite some time and when Willow came out to us all, I figured she'd be the one to talk to, so I did.
Wesley: Wesley looked up, surprised. Willow is gay?
Spike: Yeah, everyone knows that…except you I guess.
Wesley: Apparently so. Well, I'm glad for her for finding herself. Spike nodded in agreement an awkward silence fell over the table. Searching for another conversation-starter, Wesley said, What are you having to eat?
Spike: I was going to have a rare stake with some refried beans and lots of cheese. I like Cheese. You?
Wesley: I think I will try the four cheese taco with chicken.
Soon a young man of about twenty-five with black hair and green eyes served the vampire and ex watcher their food.
Spike: He turned around in his chair and watched the waiter leave. That waiter was cute, if I didn't have a soul he would be my main meal. But now I think twice about my actions because I'm nice. Plus blood and cheese don't mix very well, trust me.
Wesley: He ignored Spike's last comment. Yes that young man did have rather good looks. You're cutting your steak into very small pieces and chewing fully. I didn't know you had such refined manners. Wesley took another bite of his chicken.
Spike: Well I was brought up in the Victorian era, and manners are essential for life. If you want something to go your way, use manners.
Wesley: That's an interesting remark, Spike. I didn't know you felt that way. Yes I think manners are crucial too. Wesley dabbed delicately at the side of his mouth with his napkin.
Spike: Well no one ever talks to me about manners. Plus I want something.
Wesley: And what is that you want Spike? He raised his eyebrows in anticipation.
Spike: You. Wesley let a grin fall across his face. Spike put down his fork and reached across the table for Wesley's hand. He took hold of it, and stared into Wesley's eyes. Silence fell over both men, and they softly massaged each other's hand.
Wesley: Let's finish our meal and then head back to my apartment, we agreed that we wanted to have fun tonight, correct?
Spike: He coughed caught off guard by Wesley's invitation. Yes, please was all Spike managed to say.
Part Two
Wesley unlocked his apartment door and walked inside. Spike stood outside in the hall, waiting for Wesley's invitation. "I almost forgot, come in Spike." He stepped through the door and wiped his boots on the welcome matt.
Spike:So what are we going to do now? Play a game of Parcheesi?
Wesley: If you want, but I had something else in mind, something like this. Wesley grabbed Spike by his belt and pulled him close. He gently placed his warm lips on Spike's cold mouth. The kiss was only momentary.
Spike: I like your game better.
Wesley: yes me too.
Spike: can we play some more?
This time Spike wrapped his arms around Wesley's waist and leaned into to kiss him. As they kissed Spike had to remind himself to let Wesley breathe. The kiss became more passionate and both men explored each other's mouths with their tongues. They fell onto the couch; Spike was on top of Wesley. As Spike tasted Wesley's mouth with his tongue he began to unbutton Wesley's shirt. Wesley flinched at the cold hands on his chest, but moaned as Spike delicately caressed his nipples. Wesley pulled Spikes tight black shirt off and threw it to the floor. He ran his fingers over Spike's nipples and down to his abs, ending at his belt. Spike nodded and the sound of a zipper slowly being pulled down was heard. Spike did the same to Wesley and pulled his kakis down to his thighs. Wesley managed to shove them off. Spike undid his belt and slid his black jeans down to his ankles. Wesley used his feet to push them to the carpet. Now only in their underwear Spike seductively lowered himself to Wesley's waist. He could sense Wesley's excitement and slowly pulled the undergarment off. He kissed Wesley's throbbing member and then proceeded to please the ex-watcher in ways that even porn couldn't provide. When Wesley released himself into Spike's mouth, he sighed with ecstasy. "My turn" Wesley demanded and flipped himself on top of Spike. He was much gentler than Spike. Wesley took his time and sucked on each of Spike's nipples while stroking Spike's pulsating manhood. Eventually Wesley made his way down to Spike's hips and massaged his manhood with his tongue. Spike let out a low purr and liberated himself into Wesley's mouth. Wesley swallowed and crawled back up to Spike kissing him on the lips. They both smiled got up and went into the bedroom.
Spike: Good morning Luv. Have a nice sleep?
Wesley: As you might recall there was very little sleep to be had. But what little I did have was much needed.
Spike: Wore you out did I?
Wesley: I certainly enjoyed myself last night.
Spike: Yea. I had a good time too.
Wesley: Time? What time is it?
Spike: He glanced at the clock on the dresser. It's almost 9.
Wesley: Shit. We an hour late to work. Don't give me that look. You are in the office just as much as I am.
Wesley jumped out of bed and threw on some clothes. He gave Spike his annoyed face, and Spike grudgingly got up as well. Wesley drove a red Porsche supplied by Wolfram & Hart, Spike couldn't talk his way out of going to the office because the windows were vampire safe. The drive was silent, but Wesley and Spike were holding hands. When they pulled into the garage and stepped out of the car Spike preceded to let go of Wesley's hand, but Wesley hardened his grip, and the two men walked into the building hand in hand. They knew they would need each other's support when they broke the news to Angel.