In the Year of the Dog
Disclaimer: The idea and characters belong to the brilliant Natsuki Takaya. I own nothing, and I'm not making any money with this story. This disclaimer applies to all chapters of this story. (I'm way too lazy write this again at the beginning of every chapter.)
A new Beginning
Inuko sank to his knees, pressing his forehead against the rough hardwood floor, almost sobbing with relief. This was what he had been searching for, longing for, praying for. It was the silver line on the horizon, the light at the end of the tunnel: A new beginning.
From: "In the Year of the Dog" by Shigure Souma, chapter 15
"Oh, Gure-saan!" Ayame Souma wailed unhappily and stopped to untangle a few strands of his long, silver hair from a bush. "You know you have my utter and unconditional trust, but are you quite positive that this is the right way?"
His cousin, who had just been about to squeeze through a gap between two young oak trees, looked back and immediately hurried to Ayame's assistance.
"Aya!" he cried, gently picking a small branch out of his hair. "I am terribly sorry! I should have warned you of the perils of the underbrush! Now I shoulder the blame for you loosing some of your precious hair!"
He tearily eyed the single silver hair that clung to the braches of the bush. The third member of the group just rolled his eyes.
"Stop making a big fuss, you two!" he said sternly. "Ayame has more than enough hair on his head."
"But Tori-san!" Ayame protested.
Hatori raised a hand to silence one of his cousins and looked at the other inquiringly. "Seriously, Shigure. This forest is getting nastier by the minute. Is it far yet?"
"Not at all!" Shigure assured him. "Just a few more steps and you can already see it!" He smiled happily at his cousins and added: "And you know what's best? We are already on my property!" He gestured enthusiastically with both hands to indicate their surroundings. "The whole area belongs to the house! It's huge! Well… the ground's a bit unstable in places, and of course the woods are a wilderness – that's why it was so cheap! Isn't it wonderful?"
A geologically unstable jungle wasn't exactly Hatori's idea of "wonderful", but since he knew from experience that it was useless to argue with Shigure, he decided to save his breath and just said: "Let's go on, alright?!"
Shigure hadn't lied – technically. After they had scrambled through the brush of oaks, they could see the house. Or, at least, the tip of its roof, peeking out from the valley below them. To reach the valley floor and make their way to the doorstep, they needed another half an hour.
"You are aware of the fact that you're going to have to make that journey every time you want to go into town?" Hatori asked, brushing leaves out of his hair and clothes.
"Oh, it's not really that far, you know." Shigure beamed. "We only needed so long because there are a few trees in the way. Once I've cleared the path, it's going to be no farther than five minutes away from the main road."
"A few trees." Hatori muttered under his breath. His cousin had an amazing ability to interpret reality the way it suited him.
He didn't pursue the topic, however, because now Shigure stepped up on the front porch, turned around and spread his arms in a dramatic gesture: "My friends! Welcome to my new home! What do you think of it?"
Hatori gave the building in front of his eyes a long, scrutinizing look, before commenting with his usual honesty: "It's a ruin."
Ayame however eyed the house with a dreamy expression while absently braiding his hair over his left shoulder.
"A house in the woods," he gushed, "forgotten by the world… oh Gure-san, it is so romantic!" Now that he was standing safely on the porch, his ordeals in the woods were forgotten.
"Isn't it?" Shigure agreed amiably, threw open the door – or rather, the tattered wooden frame that once might have been a door – and ushered them in.
"It needs some renovating, of course, but I had Hideki-san – you remember, Ha-san, that architecture student with the glasses, who's always wearing those weird plaid shirts – take a look at it and he said the basic structures and the roof are all sound. It just needs some new doors and windows and it'll be perfect!"
"And some new floors… and stairs… and furniture," Hatori added, letting his eyes wander through the room.
"Now, Ha-san, don't be such a spoilsport!" Shigure complained. "It might not be a palace, but at least it's my own!"
Suddenly realizing the impact of his own words, Shigure leaned against the wooden doorframe and closed his eyes. "I have a home again," he whispered. "I belong somewhere…"
Detecting a slight tremor in his cousin's voice, Hatori turned around and was shocked to see a single tear escape from under Shigure's closed eyelid and roll silently down his cheek.
"Shigure-" he started.
Shigure snapped out of his reverie and hastily forced a smile on his face. "Besides," he said, "this house perfectly suits my objective!"
Hatori refused to swallow the bait.
"Those last two years were hard for you, weren't they?" he asked calmly.
They still didn't know why Shigure had so abruptly left Souma Estate almost two years ago. What they did know was that he'd dropped out of university the very next day and vanished on a six-months-long backpacking trip all around Japan. It had seemed like he was running from something, but whatever that something was – if it wasn't the general misery of life within the Souma family – they couldn't fathom.
He returned with his hair much longer and messier than before and with a hard determination in his eyes that Hatori had never seen there before. Instead of returning to Souma Estate, as everybody had expected him to, he moved into a filthy little apartment in one of the worst neighbourhoods in town and began to work in an almost maniacal manner; writing for three different newspapers at a time and having half a dozen other jobs in restaurants, bars and factories throughout town. Hatori, remembering the lazy, happy-go-lucky youth his cousin had been, worried, but didn't ask – and Shigure didn't explain.
To be sure, his manners didn't seem to change all that much: Whenever they saw him, he laughed and joked and flirted with Ayame, just like he ever had. But Hatori couldn't help but notice that he dropped a lot of weight, and smoked a lot more cigarettes. And didn't his jokes seem a little forced, his flirtations just a little desperate?
Still, Hatori didn't ask, and Shigure didn't explain. Until two days ago, when he had suddenly called them at the main house to announce that he'd bought a house.
Seeing him now, trying so very hard to regain his composure, his trademark light-heartedness all but shattered, Hatori decided this still wasn't the time to start asking questions. Stepping up to Shigure, he lightly laid hand on his elbow.
"Don't worry," he said. "We'll help you make this place habitable." In a rare gesture of affection, he brushed a few much-too-long bangs out of his cousin's face and added: "You should really cut your hair."
Ayame chose that moment to return from his stroll around the house and Hatori hastily stepped back as the silver-haired man flung his arms around Shigure and cried: "Gure-san! What's wrong, love?"
Shigure smiled at him a bit shakily. "I'm fine, Aya. Don't worry."
After a moment, the smile turned into a grin and he added: "Breathing is not optional, you know."
"Huh?" Ayame looked puzzled for a moment, then, with an answering grin, he released his smothering hold on his cousin.
"Sorry, Gure-san. I got carried away in my endless love and care for you!"
"And how lucky a man I am to possess the love of somebody as noble and generous as you!"
"You'll have my love to the end of the world!" Ayame assured him dramatically, taking both his hands.
"And I'll never stop loving you in return; not even when hell freezes over and the seven seas burn to ashes!"
They gave each other thumps-up, yelled "ALRIGHT!" in unison, and dissolved into laughter.
Hatori sighed and rolled his eyes, secretly relieved to see Shigure back to his usual self. Thank God for Ayame being always able to brighten the mood in moments like this!
Hatori fished his cigarettes out of his pocket, stuck one between his lips and offered another one to Shigure, who gratefully accepted.
"So…," Hatori started, giving first Shigure and then himself fire, "what is the objective you mentioned earlier?"
Shigure took a long drag on his cigarette and exhaled the smoke together with an irritated huff. "Now you want to know…," he said accusingly.
"Gure-san has an objective?" Ayame chimed in, curiously. "Quick, tell us all about it!"
Shigure pouted for another few moments, and when he finally opened his mouth, what came out was so unexpected that Hatori wasn't sure whether he was answering their question or creating another distraction.
"You know," Shigure began, dropping to the floor and lazily stretching his arms over his head, "this place isn't too far away from the main house, but far enough to be out of immediate reach. It is tranquil and secluded, with lots of space to breathe. It'll be the perfect place for Yuki to recuperate."
"Yuki?" Hatori repeated, not sure if he'd heard right. He sat down next to Shigure.
Ayame followed their example, looking back and forth between them, confusion showing in his gold eyes. "Yuki," he mumbled vaguely. "He's one of our cousins, isn't he?"
They stared at him, disbelieve in one's eyes, sadness and a trace of anger in the other's.
"Yuki is our cousin," Hatori said pointedly. "But he's your little brother!"
"Oh… right." Ayame averted his gaze and began to trace silly patterns in the dust on the floor.
Hatori sighed and turned to face Shigure again. "What brought that up all of a sudden?" he asked. "You haven't seen Yuki in two years, have you?"
"No," Shigure admitted. "But I had a little talk with Hatsuharu the other day. He asked me to take Yuki away from the main house."
He hesitated and cast an uncertain glance in Ayame's direction, then he continued: "From what he said, Haru seemed to think Yuki was dying."
Ayame's head shot up. "Dying?!" The horror in his voice was genuine. "But why?"
"To say he was dying might be a little exaggerated," Hatori tried to calm him. He took a long drag on his cigarette and closed his eyes, thinking of his latest visit to his father's office. Then again, maybe it wasn't…
"Yuki is very unwell indeed," he said reluctantly. "His asthma has gotten a lot worse, he's underweight, and lately – he is refusing to speak."
"But… why…?" Ayame whispered, shaking his head in denial and bringing his hands up to his ears as if trying to block out the words. They all knew why, of course.
Still Hatori continued, forcing himself to say the words, forcing Ayame to hear them. "My father says there's no physical reason for it. It's psychological. If he isn't removed from - "
He hesitated. Even though they all knew from whom Yuki had to be removed, it was something that couldn't be said. Ever.
"If he isn't removed from the main house soon…" He left the sentence unfinished, hanging threateningly in the air between them.
"And I'm the only one who can remove him from the main house," Shigure said after a moment, stating the obvious.
"Akito won't allow it," Hatori said.
Shigure shrugged. "I wasn't planning on asking her permission."
Hatori gave him a long, calculating look. Not that long ago, he would have sworn that his cousin would never burden himself with the responsibility for a child. But then, Shigure had changed.
Hatori made his decision. "If you are really serious about this, I'll help you convince Akito."
To his surprise, Shigure shook his head. "No, Ha-san. Don't do that!"
"Why not?"
Shigure ground his cigarette into the floor and gazed at Hatori intensely. "In a few more years, you will be Akito's doctor. She will need you. She needs to be able to trust you. Therefore, you should try not to oppose her in any major way."
Hatori returned his gaze numbly. He knew his responsibility. He had to agree with Shigure. But he didn't have to like it.
He followed his cousin's example in grinding his cigarette on the floor – Shigure would have to change the floorboards anyway – and stood.
"I have to get back. I'm doing a practical at the hospital this month, and I have to be there at five in the morning. Are you coming, Ayame?"
"Yes." The other man didn't follow him straight away though, but reached out and gingerly touched Shigure's knee to attract his attention in an unusually subdued manner. Shigure looked at him.
"Are you going to help Yuki, Gure-san?"
"Yes, I'm going to help him," Shigure answered calmly. Getting to his feet, he offered a hand to Ayame.
Ayame pulled himself up; then, standing, he brought Shigure's hand up to his face to press it against his cheek for a second. Then he dropped it and hastily walked out the door.
Hatori suddenly had to swallow.
"You're… sure you're going to be comfortable here?" he asked, just to fill the silence.
"Yes." Shigure smiled. "I have my sleeping bag, my camping stove, …"
Hatori looked around the house once more and for the first time saw it as Shigure must see it.
As a sanctuary.
"It's going to be beautiful," he said quickly, before he could change his mind again.
His eyes met with Shigure's, he saw the understanding and kindness in them – mixed with just a little amusement – and thought again how much his friend had matured.
He would have liked to give him a hug for farewell, but didn't really know how to do it. He had never been good at expressing his feelings physically.
In the end, he just lightly touched Shigure's elbow again and said: "You've worked hard for this. Be sure to get some rest now."
Shigure nodded and walked him to the door. Outside, Hatori met up with Ayame, who seemed to have regained his composure, and started on the long scramble through the woods, back to the road, where they had left the car. Before the underbrush swallowed them completely, Hatori looked back once again and saw Shigure smiling and waving on the porch of his new home.
"Be safe," he whispered.
tbc