Apologize- narration
"Apologize"- dialogue
Apologize- sung lyrics
Apologize- thought lyrics
Apologize- other thoughts
Fourteen spitballs, three lugies to the eye, seven to the hair on his head, nine "Frenchies", and four "fart-boys". He sighed as he exited the school building, making his way through the mountains of snow only Colorado could bring.
Just another normal day.
"See ya tomorrow, Frenchy!" The fattest kid in the class screamed at him across the courtyard. Eric Cartman. His friends giggled at his stupid un-orignal joke. Americans.
He tried calmly, "I'm not French, I'm Brit-"
"Yeah whatever faggot." He interrupted. They all roared with laughter at his humor once again and sauntered off.
He missed one looking back apologetically.
"Stupid Americans!" He fumed as he rushed home. "I hate this! They aren't nice, they do not effective advice, and I am done dealing with them!"
"Aw, look at poor little, Frenchy!" Another boy guffawed with his friends; O repitition, how you burn me! I looked over the boys, snickering and acting like fools, and felt my heart soar. There, in the middle of this group of gorrillas, stood him.
"D-Damien?" I gasped. Could he really be back? Perhaps we could just hang out together, or maybe we could play video games at my house, or-
My thoughts of friendship diminished when he glanced around his friends and answered my unspoken questions. "I don't hang around queers anymore, Pip." I heard only the sound of cruel mocking laughter, and feet not fleeing fast enough as I turned and ran from them. I felt as Caesar must have when Brutus stabbed him. Betrayed. Without reason, without the justice of a new day.
I'm holding on your rope;
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearing what you say
But I just can't make a sound
"Pip! Pip, wait!" An all too familiar to me from behind.
"Yes, what is it you want, Damien?"
"I'm not used to this but..." He trailed off, glaring to the sky, at God, the way he does every five minutes.
I rolled my eyes impatiently and asked (or, perhaps, more demanded), "What?"
"Well, I...uh...just wanted to say...um...that..." I started to walk away, hoping it would force him to stop wasting my time; it was limited after all.
"I'm sorry!"
I stopped dead in my tracks.
"I'm sorry, Pip. I-I didn't want to ever hurt you, I mean, I want to be friends with you, I just..."
"Just what, Damien? Just don't care about our friendship enough to give two shits about me? Just want to fit in with your other "friends" and think that I'll forgive you just like that? You always had me right in the palm of your hand, but not anymore.
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down
But wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around
And say
That it's too late to apologize,
It's too late."
"I'm sorry, Pip!"
"I said, it's too late to apologize
It's too late."
With that last thought, I left Damien standing on the sidewalk as I rushed home once more. As I made it to my house, anger and depression at my school life raged war with my other emotions and took over. Furious, I ran into the kitchen and opened the knife drawer, picking up the biggest one I had seen.
Afterword, I entered the bathroom and brought out a pill bottle from the medicine cabinet.
I set all of my supplies on top of the bathroom sink as I began to fill the tub. I burst into song once more as I thought of him.
"I'd take another chance
Take a fall, take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothing new
I loved you with a fire red
Now it's turning blue
And you say
Sorry like the angel
Heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid
That's it's too late too apologize
It's too late, too late."
As I stepped into the burning fire-water and gathered my only "friends," I began to wonder about who would miss me if I did not go to school tomorrow.
Cartman and his friends? Hell no. My other classmates, spewing insults, pursuing random pranks throughout the day to remind me of my place? Wouldn't even notice; they'd only move on to Butters.
Butters. He might notice. Would he care? Perhaps. In fact, Butters would probably would- at first. Then he would want to be accepted and would probably treat my memory horridly, eventually forgetting we were ever friends. (A/N: Pip's so OOC right now, isn't he? Emo...)
Well. Et tu, Brute? Then fall Caesar!
No one would care. Slashes. Physical pain to march my emotional pains. A pill forced down my burning throat. Another one. Another...
My vision turns red as I descend into bloody water. One last escapes my lips as a dark abyss becomes my world. Bubbles bursting silently above me.
"I'm holding on your rope;
Got me ten feet off the ground."
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A/N: Wow...after writing that, I had to ask my friend Alexis for a cookie (really). I want to know what you think: was it too sad? Should I quit talking and let you review? Perhaps... Oh and you will find out who looked back apologetically in the next chapter. If you don't figure it out, I'll tell you. The song is "Apologize", Artist: OneRepublic.
(1): (I said,it's...) For a few laughs in an otherwise emo story
(2): Sorry like the...) Sorry had to add the irony...