Title: Chipped or De-Chipped, That's the Question - Chapter 1
Author: Gisele
Date: 08/18/2002
Censor: General
Spoilers: none
Distribution: If you want this fanfic on your web site, let me know first.
Feedback: Appreciated.
E-mail: gisele56@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Buffy, The Vampire Slayer, along with all the Buffyverse, are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox, UPN and so on. Just using the characters for fun. Please, don't sue me.
Summary: The Initiative is back and wants to get Spike de-chipped, to see what happens... (An alternative universe for Season 6). SPUFFY>>> If you don't like Spike and Buffy together, don't read!
Sunnydale, January 2002

Buffy and Spike were in his crypt, having a conversation:

"It's the Initiative, Spike. They know that you are in love with me, they know you've changed since the chip was implanted, and now they are after you to complete the experience! You're just their guinea pig!"

"Yeah, because to you and your beloved friends I'm much more then just a sodding guinea pig, isn't that right?" Spike said ironically.

Buffy didn't say anything, she just lowered her head, a little ashamed, a little annoyed at the vampire impertinence. Yes, her friends — or her friend Xander — although all good things Spike had done in the last few months, still doubt that he had feelings, that he was more than just an evil soulless thing. Now, The Initiative, the organization which had implanted the chip in Spike — Hostile 17 — as a way of neutralizing him as a vampire, wanted to reverse the process: take the chip out of his brain in order to see what would happen: would Spike return to be what he was before the operation, a dangerous and mean demon, without any consideration for human life, or would the changes he had passed through be permanent, and the vampire would continue on the path of redemption, against his own nature?

In Spike's crypt, the discussion went on. Buffy had found out the Initiative's plans and had just told her boyfriend Spike about them — yeah, the Slayer had finally admitted she loved that soulless being and had told her friends and little sis Dawn they were together.

"You're dying to be de-chipped, aren't you, Spikey? To come back to your old ways, to the Happy Meal With Legs?" Buffy asked, her voice tone showing a little bit of sadness and apprehension.

"That's not the point, luv. Don't you trust me? Don't you love me? Bloody hell, I've changed!"

"Then why do you want the chip to be removed?"

"I didn't say that I want the bloody chip to be removed!" Spike said with exasperation.

"But you didn't say you didn't want to-"

"Buffy, luv, it isn't about the vampirism, anymore! Look, I'm complete defenseless against humans, I feel like a fly. If Warren or any of the other two idiots come after me, what am I supposed to do? Throw migraines at them, scream till you come to help me?"

"You want the chip to be removed, I knew!" yelled Buffy, disappointed.

"And if I wanted, what'd be the problem? You don't trust me, really."

"Spike... answer me... How about you, are you sure that if the chip is removed, you won't come back to the killing?"

Spike stayed in silence for a while, what seemed hours to his girlfriend Buffy.

"Luv, I'd love to say "yes", to say I'm sure. But I can't. Can't. I don't feel like drinking from a living person anymore, I don't miss it, indeed... I've never wanted to hurt you, and I could, you know. But, being honest, I don't know how it would be with other people, without the chip."

"Then, why risk everything? Let's get the hell out of here, let's go to a place where the Initiative can't find us!" replied Buffy, almost desperate.

"Buffy, listen to yourself! Never would you walk out on your friends, Dawn, Sunnydale! Even for me! We can't get away from the Initiative."

"OK, OK, you're right, I couldn't quit everything and live on the lam... But they'll catch you, Spike, they won't give up..." Buffy said.

"Maybe they've appeared in the right time, pet. We can't live with this doubt about the chip between us. And I, like I said, don't feel myself complete, I'm fragile before a human being."

Spike was right, Buffy knew that, but in her heart she feared that, without the chip, the vampire would return to the evil ways and she would lose her true love. Eventually, she had to capitulate and accept Spike's decision of turning himself in to the Initiative, for the chip to be removed.

"Remember, pet: whatever happened, I love you. And never, never would I hurt you, Dawn or any of your friends — not even Xander."

"I love you, too, Spikey. It was very hard for me to accept I loved you... But you understood how hard was for a person whose job is to kill vampires to fall for one... And even now, I must confess... Yes, I'm afraid, afraid that without the chip you-"

"It's why we need to do that, Buffy. Let's clear our way. We'll never be completely happy together with this doubt in our heads" Spike concluded. "And don't forget: I love you. Promise?"

"I promise, Spikey. And you, don't forget I love you, too."

Spike took Buffy in his arms and kissed her tenderly.

***

Spike was laying on the operating table, dressed all in black, sleeping tight. Around him, not only were two surgeons and nurses, but also several other people, men with sinister faces, part of the high staff of the Initiative.

The surgery to remove the chip from Spike's brain took almost 4 hours and ended successfully. Afterwards, Spike was taken to a bedroom, unconscious yet, and put in a hospital bed; Buffy was there. The relationship with the Initiative guys was cold, even rude — she knew that Spike was just a lab rat for those people and she herself was a part of the experience, too — she was the element for whom the vampire had fallen in love with and for whom he, apparently, had quit evil. It would be very interesting to know how would be the vampire's reaction to the woman he claimed to love, without the chip.

One hour went by, until Spike finally woke up. Buffy approached him and put his left hand between her hands.

"Hi, luv. Is it done?" asked Spike, still groggy due to the anesthesia.

"Yeah, it's done. Are you feeling well, Spikey?" asked Buffy, a little apprehensive.

"Good. Very good."

"?"

"Pet, come here, closer..." whispered Spike.

Even not sure if it would be the right thing to do, Buffy approached her face to Spike's. He lovingly caressed her hair, the hair he so much liked, and said:

"I love you, Buffy."

Buffy stopped fighting back the tears; sobbing, she grabbed Spike's head, caressed his bleached hair, and kissed him with passion.

***

Night came and, although already recovered from the surgery (very normal, since he was a vampire), Spike still stayed in the Initiative's secret quarters. Buffy had left to patrol — the Scoobies had called and told her that some demons were causing trouble downtown. Spike stayed under the "care" of the organization, because its staff wanted to perform some psychological tests on him. Only the next day, he was allowed to leave, and he and Buffy were told they would be monitored closely. Neither Spike (bugger it!, he had said), nor Buffy was pleased, but that was the price to pay to the only people who were able to perform such a complicated neurological procedure — on a vampire.

Sunnydale, February 2002

Weeks went by. Spike and Buffy were happy and seeing each other frequently — sometimes in his crypt, sometimes in her house, where Dawn, Willow and Tara treated him fairly well. Then, the problems began.

Several times Buffy dropped by Spike's crypt, late at night (after patrolling) and didn't find the vampire there. There were several excuses — "I was patrolling in the other side of the town", "I was visiting Clem, who lives outside Sunnydale", "I was looking for a rare herb to mix it with the pig's blood I drink" — all them not much convincing. Besides, Spike seemed far away, he was melancholic and laconic. Even his irony, his sharp tongue, were gone. Doubts arose in Buffy's mind, she thought that, maybe, his love for her hadn't survived the surgery.

Spike's mysterious escapades didn't take long to be disclosed. There was a night that Buffy had to go on patrol far away from her house and his crypt — Xander and Willow had collected a piece of information about a vampire that had been making its meal in the other side of the town: two prostitutes were found dead, with bite marks on their necks.

As soon as Buffy got out of the cab that had took her to the place where the bodies had been found, she sensed vampire vibes coming from an alley. She paid the taxi driver and rushed to the place. There, she had to face one of the most painful scenes of her entire life: Spike had a girl in his arms, and he was drinking from her neck. Paralyzed by shock and disbelief, the Slayer didn't do anything. She just stood there, looking, as if she was watching a terror movie on TV, it wasn't real, it was just a nightmare. Spike, at first, didn't notice her presence, so absorbed he was by that delicious meal. And when he did, he left the girl fall onto the dirty floor, dead. His face didn't show defiance, surprise, there wasn't a bit of evil in those blue eyes. What one saw in them was a deep sadness, that crossed Buffy's heart like the sharpest knife. And then Spike spoke:

"Sorry, luv, I'm really sorry... I swear I didn't want this... I tried, I tried so hard, but my vampire nature was stronger... I love you, I've never stopped loving you, and I'll love you forever... Now, I think you must do what you come to do-"

Spike said nothing more. He simply walked towards Buffy and leaned against the wall. Buffy, who had finally come to her senses, in tears, took a wooden stake from her pocket and threw herself towards Spike's heart.

TO BE CONTINUED