LAMP HALO

A seto joey fic. For fun not profit. Yugioh belongs to takehashi.

Wrensbloodredriver

{lamp halo - zeromancer }

There's something inside that's freaking me out, please don't, leave me alone

Something inside me is wearing me out, please don't, don't do it again.

These lyrics always spoke to me and reminded me of falling in love when that's the absolute last thing in the world you want.

prolouge

Pretty fucking sure that neither of us ever saw this comin, ever wanted it to be comin, and neither of us knew what ta do when it clawed a hole into us and implanted it's roots, starting the parasitic existence. Don't know fer sure when it happened either. And i don't really wanna know when. But i know. I know, cuz i see it in the fucker every time, he's got the same disease i do.

He wants it gone too.

And his is impossible to get rid of just like mine.

Because it's the same exact thing as mine.

We fucking fell in love with each other.

Never have we wanted to end each other more than we do now.

And we cant.

Cuz we want to. Wanna wring each other's necks. But we cant.

Cuz as much as we want the other gone, we don't wan 'im dead.

… i'm assuming too much aint i?

He doesn't care, the look im seeing is the same look he always has. Im just full of it.

I gotta be. Cuz if im not it doesnt make sense.

Geuss i am jelous.

He's me but better.

He protected his sibling. Took care of 'im.

Im lucky if i see her every year or so.

And he got that fucker out of his life. I dont envy being an orphan twice over but gozaburo ...doesnt count as a dad as far as im concerned.

Mine… cant do nothing about him. Gotta deal however i can. He's still got some human in 'im even if i doesnt show any more.

That's been my life lately if im bein honest. Trying to keep my broken father alive.

Mom hates me more than ever now and i am not completely sure why. It's killin me. Can't see serenity anymore.

Not that i have time. Being out here in early morning or the late night is the only time i can really steal from myself to try and breathe and think and ...be alive really. Take the letters from the guys out here sometimes. Yug is on tour. Tea is in run for valedictorian at her school. (neither surprize me). Tristan works like i do. and 'kura...god only knows. Last i heard he went with his dad on an expedition in egypt and ran into marik. But that was a couple months ago. To be honest i haven't gotten a letter in a while. Yug sends things from where ever he is at the moment, but hasn't actually written for a while. He sent this really nice hoodie from somewhere in brittain last time. Really soft, and warm on the inside, sturdy on the inside. Im wearin it now. Thats all really, just leaning on a lamp post outside in the late summer night chill (or is it morning now?) and just kind of staring at the clouds through this weird halo thing the lamp is making in the fog. Hands in my pocket, one on my phone, and it buzzed. And who the hell knows time in the dead of night. Curiosity got me and i pulled the bugger out. I didn't recognize the number, but mr nobody sent a text.

'Can't sleep'

Um. same bud, so? How the hell did you get my number?. I didnt answer it. I dont know the guy and i know what you are thinking yeah? "' what if it's kaiba, answer it numbskull'". Kaiba has my number, and i have his so unless this is a new phone, it aint him. It's just mr nobody.

And mr nobody can't take a hint.

'A little help?'

I knew it wasnt a good idea.

'Don't know how. I am in the same boat guy.'

'I figured :)'

… honestly. Don't do what i did.

'Uhh. excuse me?'

'Otherwise you wouldn't have answered.'

Right...get over it joey.

'Oh..'

'So yeah.'

'Okay…'

'I am sorry i'm bothering you. Just. night hurts you know. You think about things you don't want to and can normally ignore'

'..i have been punching random numbers all night. I just needed someone to talk to.'

… just...mixed emotions about this.

'Ya shouldn't talk to strangers…'

'I'm not. But you are joey. :)'

I dropped the fucking phone.