AN one shot fanfic. No flamers or haters. Please make sure to leave a review.
Today I was very happy about da swag machine at hugwhats s'cool of smartass mages. Hi my name is Swaggy Swig and I went to hugwhats to see my best friend bobby I travalled by train to and met a few friend called Bobster and Bobbie who were pre rad. We did some random stuff lik punching da little kid named Blub and bullying this dude named blob. I hate blob vry much he is a dick-tionary
When we arrive I punched the hat of the choosing thingymajig and was chosen into the weakling stuffy house slytherin I had to punch him again to be chosen to the class I want hufflepuff. I love rainbows and unicorns. They are the best animals but no-one must know that if they do ill punch them into next year.
First we had magic lessons. I smashed four swagggy sticks called wands until one of them listened and obeyed me so I aced that class but acing classes are for the weak and I punch the teachers face to get a 0. Next we had some plant classes thing and I smashed all the useless plants until the teacher, Madam Annoyingface had to stop me and in the end I punched her too. I was sent to dudedore and was given a lecture which I escaped by jumping out the window and using my rainbow unicorn flying machine.
At recess I was hanging around with Bobby McBob and was busy smashing their little faces and dragging them along the wall. Mr Poohead just had to see and give me restrain me and send me to dulldore which I escaped as well.
Later when everyone was asleep in the rooms I went to the girls rooms and chucked a giant evil unicorn which they call Nightcorn. And I sneaked up on them and chucked a stinkbomb causing absolute mayhem and mr ****head had to fix things up.