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A/N:
Just a little one shot I jotted down on my dinosaur of a phone on Valentine's Day and procrastinated uploading until now.
This is my first forage into the world of humour (or humor for all ye Americans), and I agree it's a bit of a pathetic attempt, but oh well – who doesn't like some Percabeth (and that was a rhetorical question, Pertemis/Perlia/Perico/Person/Perachel/Pestia etc. etc. etc. shippers).
And without further ado, please read and review etc.
Disclaimer: Nope, do I – a British teenage girl still in Secondary school – look like I am Rick Riordan? Therefore I do not own the world of PJO.
Disclaimer the second: I have no Beta, and grammar is quite possibly my worst enemy (along with page formatting), so please don't murder me with your choice of Greek weapon for any mistakes I've made… Feel free to rant at me for it in a review though ;)
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Percy and Annabeth sat on the grassy bank by the beach of Camp Half Blood, sharing a picnic as they watched the autumn sun sink slowly down beneath the calm waters of Long Island Sound. The scene looked like the sort of watercolour you see in waiting rooms – fierce oranges, reds and yellows painting the sky, and reflected in the soft blues and greys of the water.
They had been quiet, listening to the gentle waves lapping the shore, and watching the sunset, until Annabeth unwrapped the pizza, and the rare moment of tranquillity for the pair of demigods was shattered by Percy:
'Hey Wise Girl, we never did finish that debate.' he remarked, eyeing an olive as if it had personally offended him.
'What, the one about Athens from years ago?' Annabeth, being the daughter of Athena, had naturally caught on quickly - although she had probably just noticed Percy glaring at the vegetable in question.
'Yeah... I mean why did the Athenians choose the olive tree? In my opinion, the salt water spring would be much better.' Percy announced.
Annabeth rolled her eyes, called Percy a 'seaweed brain' and endeavoured to explain that 'there was no use for a spring of salty water in a coastal city.'
At that, Percy pouted somewhat and retaliated -
'But the salt water spring could be very useful, while olives are dangerous.' When Annabeth raised an eyebrow, he continued.
'Well, look at it... You can use a salt water spring to produce distilled water and salt and wash clothes in it and... um... season food with it? But anyway, anything would be superior to olives.' Annabeth raised her other eyebrow and gestured for Percy to continue.
'First, olives contain heavy metals like lead which are poisonous and can kill you if you have too many. Also, olives are naturally bitter and disgusting and are out of season half the time. Some people are really allergic to olives, and back in Ancient Athens they wouldn't have had a way to stop allergies as they had no way of using epinefr – epinepeph – well, adrenaline like we do now.. Even Daedalus couldn't have created the EpiPen.' Having finished his text-book perfect speech, Percy lounged back and grinned at Annabeth, almost daring her to retaliate.
'You really are a Seaweed brain.' She pointed out, sighing. 'Olives are a super food packed full of vitamins and minerals, and easily grown, especially in the climate of Athens. Allergies were much less prevalent in those days, and the quantity of heavy metal is such that you'd need to eat thousands of olives simultaneously for any effect. Olives provide food, oil, wood and money from trade. So really, Seaweed Brain, olives beat a trickle of salty water that you can't even drink. Oh, and Kelp Head? Daedalus invented the EpiPen.'
Percy flushed an interesting shade of red and quickly changed tack:b
'You're just a know it all.' he announced petulantly.
'And you're a Seaweed brain.' retaliated Annabeth, sensing victory.
'Owl head.' came Percy's retort.
'Barnacle brain.'
'Olive girl.'
'Sea squirt.'
'Pellet face. You know, because owl pellets?' Percy quickly explained.
'That's the best you could come up with?' teased Annabeth. The next thing she knew, she was spluttering for breath and floundering in the shallows of the sea.
'PERCY JACKSON!' she yelled furiously scrambling to her feet.
'Just a trickle of salty water, eh?' he asked grinning.
'I'll get you for that.' Annabeth threatened, as she charged out of the sea and towards her boyfriend, who began sprinting away as soon as she got near.
And that was how, on the evening of Valentine's Day you could see an irate Annabeth Chase chasing a madly chuckling Percy Jackson around Camp, intercepted every few seconds by blasts of salty water.
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